Everyone Has a Double Somewhere
by Reparata
Summary: Crazy fic about crazy people I love. Shenny with lots of Lemonade. Sheldon's govt involvement costs him his sight and Penny becomes his 'companion'. Pls enjoy. 'M' segments clearly marked. Chapter 28 is up for those of you who can remember the story line. Rep.
1. Chapter 1

This came to me while I dozed on my couch and 'listened' while my B/F watched some old Chuck DVD. It's kinda weird but I had to let the fingers talk. It's 5 chapters long and this is by far the longest for those of you with either short attention spans or limited time to read. Rating may change for the final chapter but it's not finished yet.

This is my first BBT attempt. I make no money from this and damn little from my regular job but that's my problem.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 1<p>

She stepped out of the cab and sighed. Another assignment that wasted her talents and moved her further and further from her goal: an international assignment where she could gain recognition and acceptance. She paid the driver and took her single suitcase from the seat and walked into the apartment building. She glanced at the mailboxes and noted the apartment number and sighed again.

The elevator was out of order and she dreaded walking up four flights of stairs in 4-inch heels but she was already a day late in arriving in Pasadena. _'At least it's not Burbank'._ A part of her mind registered the lingering after odor of hydrazine and she filed it away for later study.

To the casual observer she would appear to be dressed for a night of clubbing even though it was 5pm. Her sleeveless red silk dress hugged her curves and ended about 3 inches above the knee but was cut very low and displayed sufficient skin to catch the eye of any red-blooded male with a pulse. Her lipstick, nail polish and shoulder bag were all the exact same color as her dress and her naturally wavy blonde hair was cut shorter than usual and barely touched the collar of her dress but framed her face in a sunburst of blonde.

The only thing that might seem unusual about her was the color of her eyes – light gray with flecks of gold surrounding the irises, giving them definition. She'd been told once or twice that her eyes were creepy, beautiful, bottomless, and other adjectives, but she never thought much about it. Her eyes were her eyes, period. They enabled her to see and process images and act upon those images.

The blonde extended the handle on her suitcase and mounted the staircase.

'_Well, I'll be able to skip the StairMaster in rotation at the gym if I stay more than a week or two.'_

Finally reaching the fourth floor, she quickly spotted the apartment she needed and knocked on the door. Several times. Impatient, she made a fist and pounded on the door.

* * *

><p>The door opposite 4A opened and she whirled around, surprised, and fought down the trained impulse to assume a defensive stance. She forced herself to relax and 'smile' at the young blonde woman who'd walked out of 4B. She was wearing a waitress uniform and a nametag that read 'Penny'. She was bare footed so she must have just returned from work.<p>

"Hi, I'm looking for Dr. Sheldon Cooper. I'm here to see about subletting his apartment." She lied. She was only there to sublet a bedroom made available by the sudden departure of Dr. Leonard Hofstadter for 'parts unknown'.

"Oh, well, Sheldon's still at work but you can wait in my apartment if you like. I was just going down to check the mail but it can wait. I'm Penny," she rambled on.

"I'm Alexandra but my friends just call me Alex," _or Barbara, Tanya, Lois or any of the myriad of other aliases I've used but 'Alex' is close enough to the truth._

"He should be home within thirty minutes. Since Leonard…left, he either takes the bus or catches a ride home with Raj or," and here she shuddered visibly, "or with Kripke."

"He doesn't own a car?" She wasn't surprised but she did have to work her cover.

"No! Sheldon doesn't drive. Well, he has a learner's permit but except for driving me to the ER when I fell in the shower and dislocated my shoulder, he doesn't drive."

"Well, perhaps he and I could carpool? My car is in transit from the East Coast and unless the idiots can't find Pasadena, it should be here in two days although for the life of me I cannot abide with people who cannot keep to a schedule."

'_Oh, she's exactly like my whack-a-doodle…this will be so much fun to watch…'_

* * *

><p>She and Penny talked for a while in generalities and then they heard the arrival of Raj and Sheldon. They were arguing at length about some minute detail of the work they'd been doing and Sheldon was biting with his comments about Raj's competence.<p>

"We lost valuable time today, Rajesh, due to your math error. I suppose it was my fault since I failed to properly supervise you." To Alex he sounded haughty and superior, things she detested but had to endure for the Greater Good.

Penny leaned over and tapped Alex's shoulder to get her attention. She was visibly surprised when Alex whirled on her and glared.

"I do not like people touching me, Penny. Please refrain in the future – assuming I agree to sublet."

"I was just going to say that Sheldon got Raj a position with him when Raj's funding dried up and he was in danger of being deported. He's really a nice guy underneath all those layers of shirts and those disgusting plaids he's addicted to…despite what you heard."

Alex stood and thanked Penny for allowing her to wait in her apartment. "I suppose I've wasted enough time here. I don't like wasting time, especially mine. Thank you for the hospitality. I'm sure I'll see you again, Penny." She turned and walked away leaving Penny wondering if Sheldon might have lied to her or forgotten to mention that he had _another_ sister…just like him?

* * *

><p>Alexandra walked out into the hallway, dragging her suitcase along behind her.<p>

"Which of you is Dr. Sheldon Cooper?" She knew damned well which one was her mark but had to work her cover.

"I…" Sheldon's eyes got big and his face paled even more as he looked at the tall blonde in the red…red everything…

Raj looked at her and mirrored Sheldon's actions and backed up to Sheldon's door all the while making sounds that resembled some form of speech and might have been 'Seex, Seex, Shiva save me…'

"I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper. And you are?" Number Six was mere fiction. Still, science fiction was future science fact…

"Dr. Alexandra Forrest. I'm here about subletting the apartment. Dr. Hofstadter mentioned it before leaving for his new posting. Is the room still vacant?" Her eyes never left his. She was gauging his response and reaction to her presence – and laughing inside.

"Yes, it is. Raj, I'll see you tomorrow. Please don't be late. Dr. Forrest, please come in." He unlocked the door and walked into the apartment and took a stance she knew was his attempt to control his encounter. He was uncomfortable with change and she was certainly a change.

Alex took control right from the start. "I assume you are willing to sign an agreement outlining specific stipulations as to comportment, common areas and rules and conditions, are you not, Dr. Cooper?"

Sheldon was pleasantly surprised when she reached down and retrieved a bound document entitled 'Roommate Agreement between Dr. Alexandra Forrest and Dr. Sheldon L. Cooper' from a pouch on the exterior of her suitcase and handed it to him along with a ball point pen.

Sheldon smiled and began reading the document while Alex quickly surveyed the room. It was orderly and furnished in a rigid sort of _Feng shui _that quietly stressed order and purpose. She wondered if he did _everything_ by the numbers but squelched the thought as totally inappropriate. _That's what got me into trouble in Burbank…someone's 'rigidity'._

"I find we are in agreement on many of the points that Leonard, my previous roommate, found himself at odds with. With the exception of Saturday, I am in complete agreement."

"And what about Saturdays do you find _disagreeable?" _Her voice became even calmer and colder and her eyes bored into his as if daring him to disagree.

"Saturday mornings I arise early and watch _Dr. Who_ and that violates your 'no TV before 8am on weekends' provision."

"Well, I suppose if you are in agreement with all the other codicils and sections that I can make an amendment for Saturday…if you promise to keep the volume low."

"I do. Should I draft – " He wanted to have something of his in the agreement.

"No, I'll bring it by for final signature. May I move in tomorrow? My vehicle is in transit. I prefer the train for long trips. Flying is so…confining and spending time in an aircraft with its recycled air and all those people with their germs and…and …is quite disgusting."

Sheldon gaped when she said 'train' and his opinion of Dr. Forrest skyrocketed. "Oh, I am so happy you prefer the train…I myself abhor air passage for all the reasons you stated. Of course, tomorrow? Excellent!"

Deciding to bring the conversation to an end and establish a rapport, she asked him if he was from Texas by chance.

"Why, yes, I am. Galveston. And you, Dr. Forrest?"

"I was raised outside Longview but spent the majority of my time going from oil rig to oil rig just about everywhere on Earth. My daddy was a driller and my mother…left us early on. I consider myself a Texan."

She took out her checkbook and wrote a check for the prorated amount of the monthly rent plus the next month's full amount. "I suppose I should make this out to you, Dr. Cooper, as the lease is in your name. Is that satisfactory?" she asked, holding out the completed check to him.

"Yes. That will be fine." He took the check and did the math. Amazing. Correctly prorated and from her handwriting, properly made out to 'Dr. S. Cooper, PhD' as was his preference.

"Well then, Dr. Cooper, until tomorrow." She turned to leave but stopped at the door when Sheldon asked if she had plans for the evening.

"I do not 'date', Dr. Cooper. My work is far too demanding of my time. Thank you anyways." She turned back to the door, smiling. _Gotcha!_

"Oh, please." The 'please' was drawn out and disdain showed in his voice for her assumption that he, Dr. Sheldon Cooper, was asking her for a 'date'.

"Dr. Forrest, I do not 'date' nor do I have time either to spend on such social pleasantries in which I have no interest. My research and managing of my assistant occupy almost all my waking hours. I was going to ask if you would like to meet the others whom you'll find occupying space here from time to time since tonight is Thai Food Night."

"I suppose getting the required social niceties out of the way early is more efficient than an unpredictable flow of introductory interruptions that will destroy my schedule. What time?"

"Seven. Please be punctual. It is – "

"Rude to be late. Yes. I hate people who have no respect for my time. Now, if our introductory phase is over, I need to find a hotel and unpack. I shall return at seven. Goodbye, Dr. Cooper."

Sheldon sat down in his spot and sighed. He'd always known that somewhere on the planet there was a female version of _Homo Novis_…and she'd just left his apartment.

* * *

><p>6:45pm<p>

Penny arrived first, dressed in casual clothes. She wore cut-off denim shorts and a t-shirt Leonard had given her and flip-flops. Her blonde hair was in a ponytail and she plopped down beside Sheldon and watched as he killed several of his enemies before Penny interrupted him and he got killed himself.

"Whatcha doin', Moonpie?" She loved ragging on Sheldon. He let her get away with so much more than he allowed the others. It was almost as if he knew that his 'strikes' were useless and that what she brought into the group dynamic was so much more than her absence would afford.

"Well, Penny, I was playing a campaign on Halo before I was jostled and then dragged into this inane conversation with you."

"Oh. Sorry, Moonpie." She wasn't. Not one bit and he knew it.

"Don't call me 'Moonpie', Penny. Only my mother and MeeMaw get to call me that."

She ruffled his hair and then leaned against him. She enjoyed getting within Sheldon's comfort bubble and watching him squirm.

"So, you gonna allow Number Six to take Leonard's room, sweetie?" She also noted the resemblance between Dr. Forrest and the actress who played the Cylon on BSG.

"Yes. She is exactly the kind of roommate I need. She doesn't require interaction and she believes in living her life according to logic and a schedule. She's coming for Thai this evening to get the 'social requirements' of moving in tomorrow out of the way. She's the epitome of efficient living. Why, she even had an agreement written that mirrored my own. Imagine that?"

"Yeah. Imagine that," Penny said, dryly. A Sheldon with boobs? Who ever would have imagined it? She couldn't but then she really hadn't given much thought to Sheldon having a female counterpart in her wildest imaginings. She wouldn't admit it but she was a little intimidated by Alexandra or 'Alex' to her friends. She tried to imagine what Alex's friends would be like but quit when she conjured up a female Walowitz and shuddered.

Howard and Raj appeared shortly after Penny and Raj 'eeped' when he saw Penny and whispered into Howard's ear.

"Cat still got your tongue, sweetie?" Penny asked and Raj nodded, smiling at her.

"Sheldon, Raj says that a woman came to ask about Leonard's room for sublet and that..."

Just then there was a knock at the door and Sheldon grinned after glancing at his watch and noting that she had knocked at precisely the agreed upon time.

"Howard, get the door and see for yourself," Sheldon smiled and gestured towards the door. He smiled evily.

_'This is going to be a great Bazinga!'_

* * *

><p>7PM Precisely<p>

Alex knocked at the door and waited…and waited. She glanced at her watch that she'd set after glancing at Sheldon's and gave a huffy breath.

The door opened and someone, still talking over his shoulder to someone in the living room, stepped into her and stumbled against her and then gave a shriek and ran back into the apartment and slammed the door. She heard a man's voice scream "It's Number Six! Save yourselves!"

Not more than 10 seconds later Sheldon opened the door and smiled his brief but goofiest smile. "Hello, Dr. Forrest. You were precisely on time and I apologize for MISTER Wolowitz' hysterical response to you and the subsequent delay in your arrival. He's much too invested in Battlestar Galactica."

Alex didn't understand the reference but understood the compliment on her punctuality and subsequent apology. She could see the Indian man she'd seen earlier in the afternoon whispering something to a man(?) wearing an outdated disco outfit and sporting a Peter Tork haircut who was staring at her while trying to catch his breath.

"Definitely Number Six. Poor Sheldon. She's going to gut him like a fish after she drains his mind of his intelligence."

Alex gave Wolowitz a glare and stage-whispered to Sheldon that she would not tolerate such disrespect and then turned to Wolowitz and declared, "That's a strike for you, MISTER Wolowitz. Two more and you're banned for 30 days. You have been warned."

Sheldon beamed a smile at the back of his new roommate while Howard glared but said nothing more. He was thinking, though, about how this beautiful woman was more fucked up than even Sheldon and sighed in pity and resignation.

Raj whispered something in Howard's ear and Howard dutifully parroted "Raj wants to know what discipline you're in and what you're going to do at Caltech. He doesn't speak in front of women. He doesn't mean any disrespect, he just has this inability…"

"Dr. Koothrappali, I'm here on a grant from the Department of Energy and my research is in finding ways to improve frakking. It is important to the very survival of our nation that we establish our own energy independence from Third World despots, no offense intended, Doctor."

Howard leered and practically oozed out "Frakking? As in…"

"That's another strike, Howard. Considering your world view it doesn't surprise me that you don't know the term in the real world. 'Frakking' is the method of reaching gas and oil deposits at extremely deep depths as well as efficiently extracting petroleum from tar sands."

Alex turned and smiled at Sheldon, a _real_ smile that softened the sharp planes of her face and made Sheldon blink and then return her smile with a weak copy.

"Dr. Cooper is absolutely correct, Mr. Wolowitz. 'Frakking' is not a euphemism for coitus but an engineering method as he so succinctly described but then one wouldn't expect the man who sent the International Space Station a toilet that flushed _up_ and is alleged to have lost the Mars Rover to comprehend an interdisciplinary term."

Sheldon giggled and was rewarded with another blazing smile from his new roommate. "Well, now that Dr. Forrest has established her bona fides, let's order dinner, shall we?"


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own my car and am working on my house but sadly I don't own TBBT or the characters but I do play with them in my world.

* * *

><p>Chapter 2<p>

Caltech Food Court  
>Four days later<p>

"So, Sheldon, has Number Six tried anything? Invaded your dreams, sat in your spot, tried to alter your perceptions of reality?" Wolowitz was on a roll and venting his ire with Alexandra Forrest on Sheldon. He'd been bested in front of his friends and it had left a definite welt.

"Howard, Howard, Howard", Sheldon began, wishing the engineer would simply shut up and allow him to eat his sandwich in peace. "You're still upset about Thai Food Night, aren't you? Well, she only told the truth and I, for one, am glad that she has adopted the same disciplinary methodology as I. It saves so much time in record keeping."

"She's done something to you, right? She has, hasn't she? A woman with a body like that and a face that could launch a thousand erections with a single smile…"

"Mr. Wolowitz, I see you're once again despoiling the luncheon atmosphere with your sexist drivel. For the life of me I fail to comprehend why Dr. Cooper tolerates your presence let alone your senseless and distracting comments." In actuality, Alex found Howard amusing sometimes. He was so insecure in his own sexuality.

Howard cringed and Raj squeaked when Alex set her tray down in the spot usually occupied by the missing Leonard.

"Hello, Dr. Koothrappali. I see the cat still has your tongue. Don't fret about it. I'm sure it's just a transitive condition." She glanced at Raj and he blushed at her comment and accompanying smile. She liked the quiet Indian and would like to get to know him better but it was not in her cover.

"Dr. Cooper, my car has finally arrived and since we cohabit the same apartment, I shall be more than pleased to provide transportation to and from Caltech assuming our schedules don't clash too often. I suppose one must be flexible to maintain the harmony of the hearth."

"That would be excellent, Dr. Forrest. Raj needs to leave early to attend to some family business and I abhor public transportation."

Alex smiled and nodded in agreement. "Yes, all those people crowded together in one metal frame are a veritable petri dish of potential infection. So, I shall meet you at your office at 4:45. Please be ready. I detest waiting in small rooms without windows, probably why I elected to pursue an 'outdoor' career path."

The rest of lunch passed in strained silence with Raj wishing he could ask the question he'd had since he'd first met Alexandra Cooper.

The silence was broken by the arrival of Leslie Winkle, who had worked with Leonard reproving the basic rules of physics over and over again, wasting valuable resources Sheldon felt could be better utilized in funding his research.

"Boys," she greeted Howard and Raj with a nod and then turned to Sheldon. "Dr. Dumbass. I don't suppose you've heard from Hofstadter, have you?"

"No, Dr. Winkler, and I'm vexed that he has not sent even a text message advising me of his activities. Whatever project he's working on must be highly classified if he's not permitted to even text his friends."

"Perhaps he's simply relishing your absence, Dr. Dimbulb. I know I would."

"Dr. Cooper, aren't you going to introduce me to your…associate?" Howard looked down at his plate and Raj made his 'Eep' sound again and leaned back to watch the show. He wished he had salted litchi nuts to enjoy when Alexandra crossed swords with Winkle.

"Alexandra, this is Dr. Leslie Winkle, an experimental physicist who worked with my former room mate. Leslie, this is Dr. Alexandra Cooper, my new room mate and a DOE-funded researcher on fossil fuel extraction methods also known as 'frakking' although Howard didn't know that but that comes as no great surprise."

"You must be made of stern stuff to tolerate the dumbass' antics. I'd have murdered him in his sleep and dissolved the body in acid and then the world would be a better place." Winkle's tone was caustic and Alex put a mental mark next to her name. She would bear watching.

"Dr. Cooper is an excellent room mate and I find his presence in my liferather comforting since my first urge is to beat the shit out of you for denigrating one of the greatest minds of our times but, as I said, his presence calms me – lucky for you!"

Raj gave out a characteristic 'Eep' and whispered something in Howard's ear.

"That's an excellent idea, Raj. Sheldon, why don't you invite Dr. Forrest to paintball on Sunday and we can stage a 'Death Duel' between her and Leslie. I think that would be a duel worth watching, like Han Solo versus – "

"Yeah, a Death Duel but let's make it interesting. I'll partner with Wolowitz and you and Dr. Dumbass can die together. Wolowitz, don't get any ideas. This is just paintball, nothing else." She knew how Howard's mind worked. She liked men and sex but even she had her standards.

Sheldon attempted to intervene. He knew Winkle was deadly even with the ball and chain Howard would present. He had no idea how Alexandra would fare.

"Ridiculous. Dr. Forrest is – "

"Game on, Tinkle. First team to five kills wins and the losers – well, we'll decide that after we decimate you and your 'partner'. Dr. Koothrapalli will be the judge and final arbiter…if that's okay with you, Rajeesh?" She smiled at him and reached over and gave his hand a friendly squeeze. He 'Eeped' excitedly and nodded his acceptance.

Sheldon was impressed with his roommate's behavior and defense of him. He also was sporting a hard on that made leaving the table after completing his meal on schedule impossible.

'_What is wrong with me? I am Homo Novis and as such, above the physical! One of the greatest minds of our times? Well, at least she got that right.'_

* * *

><p>The night before the paintball duel, Penny was over at Sheldon's getting tips on Age of Conan when Alexandra asked her if she would like to watch the 'Death Duel' and perhaps help Raj 'officiate'.<p>

"Really, Moonpie? A Death Duel with the Bitch? Oh, I gotta watch you kick her ass up around those skinny shoulders. Count me in, Dr. Forrest."

"Penny, how many times must I tell you that – " Sheldon began his usual response to being called 'Moonpie' but Penny interrupted him.

"I'm your best girl friend and if anyone in California gets to call you Moonpie it's gonna be me, so just admit you like it and move on, Sheldor."

"Sheldor?" Alexandra asked, curious.

"Yeah. It's his screen name in Age of Conan and he and I rule the game, isn't that right, Sheldor?"

"Yes, Queen P, of that I am certain. Now, tomorrow, well, that's a different scenario. You know that Winkle is deadly in paintball and will sacrifice Howard in order to win. I, on the other hand, do not desert my comrades in battle. The bond of friendship overcomes fear of loss, Alexandra. If we lose, we lose together although I would like, just once, to whip her scrawny butt." His Texas drawl came through loud and clear making Alex smile.

She glanced at Penny and wondered if Sheldon knew that she was in love with him? If this were a 49-B scenario, Penny would be sent packing in a heartbeat but it wasn't and Alex wished them both well. It was so obvious to her and she wondered if Sheldon Cooper was gay or just asexual?

* * *

><p>The morning of the paintball duel dawned sunny and clear and Alex had just returned from her morning run of 2 miles. Sheldon was sitting at the kitchen table eating his breakfast and ignoring the butterflies in his stomach. He knew they would lose and he hated losing – especially in front of Penny, although he was loathe to admit that her opinion of him mattered.<p>

"Morning, Sheldon. Is it too early to go over the equipment and strategy for today's match? I've never played paintball and I don't want to lose because I didn't know the equipment."

"Excellent idea, Alexandra. I'll assemble our equipment and we can go over it after you take a much needed shower. You can use Leonard's since he left it behind although the coveralls won't fit you."

"Oh, that's okay. I brought my work clothes and I think they'll fill the bill okay. They're not camouflaged but they blend in pretty well. I'll be right out."

While Alex showered and Sheldon assembled Leonard's equipment from the storage closet, Penny came in and made herself a coffee and then sat quietly waiting for the roommates to show up. She liked Alex but didn't like the way Sheldon's eyes followed her around the room or how well the two of them meshed. She hated to admit it, but she felt jealous of the blonde researcher.

_Sheldon's blue eyes should be following me around just like…shit…who am I kidding? She's…Sheldonette…his other half. I don't stand a chance so long as she's…_

Alex walked out into the living room wearing her operations fatigues that hugged her almost like a second skin. She saw Sheldon's eyes widen and felt a thrill of satisfaction until she saw the look on Penny's face…then she felt guilty.

"My word, Alex, why do you wear something like that to work on an oil rig? I expected jeans and a t-shirt. Perhaps…"

"Sheldon, I've been in some places, hazardous places, like the jungles of Borneo and places in the Philippine Islands where jeans and t-shirts would be torn and tattered in a few hours. This is made of special cloth that resists tears and snags. I also have used it to protect myself from bruising while spelunking."

Her answers satisfied Sheldon who then quickly reviewed the gear, how the paintball gun operated and the need for accuracy and daring.

"We face a known killer, Alex, and we'll probably die embarrassing deaths but pride is on the line. I just hate to think what Winkle will dream up as our penance."

* * *

><p>Paintball Park<p>

Penny rode with Raj to the Paintball Park and she handed him a wine cooler when they parked the car. "Here, Raj. It's a wine cooler but the alcohol will enable you to do your judge thing without whispering stuff in some guy's ear."

Raj smiled and drank the cooler and thanked her with a smile. In a few minutes he'd be able to speak to a woman without swallowing his tongue.

The two teams were assembled at the sign-in office and both were glaring at the opposition. Raj made an announcement and had everyone's attention: "This is a Death Duel. First team reaching 5 confirmed kills is the winner. After a player is killed, he," here he looked at Alex, "or she, must report to me and the duel continues. If both team mates are killed, we will start a new round until the total kills equals five for one team. I will judge a kill vs a wound. My word is final. Take your places. The game begins in 3 minutes when I blow my whistle."

* * *

><p>Alex had downloaded a satellite map of the area and knew where she wanted to set up their kill zones. She asked Sheldon about his accuracy and he drawled, "Alexandra, I am from Texas. My daddy took me coon hunting and I can come so close to the coon that it craps in fear."<p>

"Good, because you're our sniper and I want you here," she said pointing to the printed map, "and I'll head out into the woods and flush them out. A wound is not good enough, Sheldon. You must aim for a kill shot."

Sheldon paled at the thought of 'killing' someone, even in paintball. He usually aimed for the leg or arm in regular competition since it was a 'kill' but in a Death Duel…

Penny walked up and gave Sheldon a closed-mouth kiss on the lips 'for luck' and whispered, "Kick the Winkle Bitch's ass good, honey" leaving Sheldon shocked but motivated. Penny walked over to join Raj. The two teams dispersed in opposite directions and then Raj blew the whistle signifying the beginning of the duel.

* * *

><p>Alex crept around behind Team Tinkle and as soon as Howard was at the edge of the tree line she fired several times hitting the trees around him. He turned and fired blindly into the woods and then ran out into the clearing.<p>

"Aw, shiiiit!" Sheldon hit him once in the chest and once in the face shield, both kill shots, and Raj blew his whistle and raised a blue flag signifying that Team Sheldon had a kill.

Winkle cursed Howard out and then stepped back from her position and surveyed the area. She figured Forrest had the kill so that meant Dumbass was probably the one who had flushed him out with that fusillade of random shots. Good. That meant she'd be done sooner than she thought and with no witnesses. She had a surprise in store for Dr. Dumbass.

Howard wiped blue paint from his face shield and vowed to even the score. Like Winkle, he figured Sheldon had been behind him and fired all those misses that spooked him out into the clearing so Alex could kill him.

"Penny, did you note that there were only two paintballs fired and that each struck for a kill? I think Sheldon is the sniper and Dr. Forrest is slithering around in the thicket pursuing Winkle. A fine strategy but it leaves Sheldon exposed to flanking."

Penny was thrilled that her Whackadoodle had taken out Howard. She just wished that the paintballs had hit him in his filthy mouth. She was so tired of his sexist comments and his veiled come-ons that she could scream. Every time he stared at her boobs or made some comment she felt the need for a bleach shower.

* * *

><p>Alex crept up behind Winkle and waited for just the right moment before hitting her in the helmet and the back. Raj saw Winkle step from the trees into the clearing but didn't see any paintball splashes. Neither did Sheldon and so he shot her once in the face shield and again in the chest.<p>

Winkle howled in anger that Sheldon had fouled her but Raj was having no part of it.

"No! You emerged from the thicket presenting your pristine front to him and he fired not knowing that you were already hit. No foul! A team kill for Team Sheldon!" He raised the blue flag again and called the warring factions in.

"That is two kills for Team Sheldon and none for Team Winkle. The match is 2 to nil. Go to point B on your maps and wait for my whistle."

He and Penny jogged over to another section of the park. This round required a team to capture the opposing team's flag to win or to 'kill' the other team members. A win equaled two kills in the death duel plus any individual kills counted as one. Team Sheldon could wrap it up by capturing the flag and killing one member of Team Winkle.

The area had several sheds and junk cars littering the field and each flag was set on the edge of an opposing tree line.

"Sheldon, guard the flag. I'll flush them out or take them out. I don't trust Tinkle to play fair so beware of her."

"Ah, 'Tinkle'…a disparaging label to demean the enemy and improve my morale." He gave her his patented smirk and she just shrugged. "Sheldon, whatever floats your boat. Now, be on guard and don't expose yourself unnecessarily." She faded away into the tree line intent on flanking them and taking out Wolowitz and then Winkle.

Sheldon settled in about 5 yards from the flag behind a thick tree trunk and watched the field of play. To amuse himself, he measured the angles and distance between possible refuges for an advancing enemy.

* * *

><p>Before the 2nd phase, Winkle had given Howard a new ammunition pack and told him to use it sparingly since it was 'special paint ball ammo' and to only use it on Sheldon if he had a clear shot. Winkle ran forward and hid behind a wrecked car and waited for Forrest or Cooper to show their faces.<p>

Howard moved along the perimeter seeking to pass by Alex who was sure to be advancing. He wanted to come up on Sheldon's blind side. He rushed around the side of a clapboard shed and tripped, discharging his paintball pistol. The ball hit the side door of a wrecked pickup truck. The paint splattered and then began to smoke and hiss as the liquid slowly ate away at the paint and metal.


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry. I had a hot appendix that wouldn't wait so I've been unable to write. Enjoy and if you've a mind, drop me a line and let me know what you think.

Rep

* * *

><p>Chapter 3<p>

Howard was lying face down on the dirt and raised his eyes to the pickup truck door and began cursing in as many languages as he knew. The smell of rotten eggs brought back memories of a lab accident and he felt a cold jolt of panic as awareness crashed into him.

Penny and Raj were standing on the perimeter of the playing field. Raj was sipping another wine cooler and watching Howard while Penny had her eyes glued on the spot she knew Sheldon favored when he was sniping and protecting the flag.

"FOUL! Stop the match! FOUL!", Howard cried, standing up and walking quickly towards Penny and Raj. When Raj did nothing, Howard started running towards the two of them yelling "Acid! There's acid in the paintballs!"

Leslie Winkle cursed her dumbass partner. She should have kept the 'special' paintballs for herself but wanted to make damned sure _someone_ got a shot at Dr. Dumbass. If it wasn't her then who else but one of Cooper's 'trusted friends'? The irony appealed to her.

Winkle lost her temper and fired a few balls at Howard from her own position near a wrecked car, hitting him only once but once was enough.

"Arrrrrrggggg!" Howard's scream of pain caught Penny's attention. She grabbed the backpack that Sheldon had told her to 'Hang on to this. You never know when the Apocalypse might strike' and ran towards their friend who was lying on the ground trying to pull his tight jeans off and crying in pain.

She knelt beside him and saw the smoking hole in his thigh and opened the backpack and pulled out a bottle of water and poured it over the wound and then reached further into the pack and pulled out a box of baking soda and dumped a handful onto the wound. Sheldon's emergency planning had included basic first aid for Penny and she remembered almost all of what he'd told her.

_'Now, Penny, we don't know what we'll be up against should the Apocalypse befall us so I've made a list of things in your survival backpack; everyone has the same items – except for Tampons, of course.'_

When she asked why she had a backpack, Sheldon just stared at her, dumbfounded, and said, _'Why Penny, what good is surviving if you're not with us?'_

She would never forget the sincerity in his voice, the warmth and caring. That's when she realized just how much he cared for her and how much she cared for him.

Sheldon stood up to see why Howard was ending the match and caught a glimpse of Leslie Winkle as she stepped out from behind a shed and started firing at him. Thinking that the match was still on, he fired twice, hitting her in the facemask and in the chest. She fired again and he was going to cry 'foul' when one of her paintballs hit him squarely in the plastic facemask and another struck him high in the left shoulder. The plastic immediately started melting and Sheldon forgot all about rules and began firing at Winkle, covering her face guard with blue paintball splatters.

Winkle tore off her helmet and turned and started shooting at Howard and Penny to distract Sheldon. She continued walking towards Sheldon while firing the acid pellets at Wolowitz and Penny. Penny threw herself over Howard to protect him.

Sheldon lost it. He tore off his own helmet and face shield and poured a plastic bottle of water over his face and eye he took from his backpack. Penny was in danger and he couldn't be concerned with his own well being. Sheldon mentally became Sheldor and Penny his Queen P. No one messed with his Queen P.

He fired repeatedly at her face, striking her with almost every paintball he fired. She fired again and again at him while he methodically covered her face with paint splatters.

Penny saw that Sheldon was advancing on Winkle as if he was immune to the acid paintballs. Screaming in rage, she grabbed the heavy backpack and ran toward Winkle and spun around in a circle like an Olympic hammer thrower and whacked Winkle hard in the face. She laughed when she realized that Winkle never saw her coming since Sheldon had kept up a steady stream of paintballs.

She started going 'all Nebraska' on her skanky ass but stopped when she heard Sheldon's strangled cry of pain. "My eyes!"

* * *

><p>Six hours later at a 'secure' facility<p>

Penny hadn't left his side since he'd been brought to the room from the operating theatre. Alexandra had brought her up to speed on where they were, who she was and why they were there. Conversation on the helicopter had been impossible and anyway Penny had been focused solely on Sheldon.

"Why spy on Sheldon? He's loyal and above politics. He isn't even registered to vote. His work is all he thinks about."

"I wasn't spying on him. I was sent to protect him. He and Dr. Hofstadter discovered…wait, don't you ever wonder why the elevator in your building hasn't been repaired?"

"Well, yeah, but not enough to make a big deal out of it." The exercise she got going up and down the stairs kept her thighs and butt toned and tight.

"Between the two of them, Leonard and Dr. Cooper formulated and made what we call 'SuperHydrazine', an incredibly powerful rocket fuel. Somehow the North Koreans found out about it and an NK agent named Joyce Kim tried to romance Leonard into giving her the fuel sample and the formula. Sheldon dropped it down the elevator shaft to prevent it and the rest is history."

"Wait, Sheldon blew up the _elevator_?"

"Nope. Sent it into orbit. The Air Force thought it was a missile launch but it went off their scopes and they notified us. NASA added some orbits to a shuttle that was already on a mission and they retrieved – the elevator car. It's a good thing no one was in it when Dr. Cooper dropped the whole mess down the shaft and then sent the elevator to the basement otherwise…"

"But that was years ago…"

"Do you know how many Otis elevators there are? No one connected the Pasadena 'missile launch' with the elevator car. It was a mystery for years until one day someone ran some old records and made some connections. We dragooned Leonard into working with us and they sent me to watch over Dr. Cooper until Leonard could duplicate his SuperHydrazine."

"Is Sheldon in danger?" Her heart started skipping beats and she unconsciously grabbed Sheldon's hand in a death grip. "Was Winkle trying to…kill Sheldon?" She hated Leslie Winkle before all this happened but now she wanted nothing more than to take a baseball bat to her ugly face and show her why her daddy called her 'Slugger'.

"We don't know. We think that Winkle was just getting some payback because Dr. Cooper wouldn't sleep with her. She has this obsession with sleeping with the smartest guys in the country and so far Sheldon's the only one to turn her down and he's at the top of her list. She's just flippin' nuts is all. She'll be tried and convicted and probably sent away someplace nice and cozy like Shutter Island."

Penny wasn't sure but her hatred of Leslie Winkle kicked up a few notches until she was almost shaking with rage. '_Winkle tried to sleep with Sheldon? That BITCH!_ '

"Alex, how do you know all this?" She was afraid of the answer.

"Well, we bugged Leonard's apartment and all his friends and his labs so we got an ear full."

'_Oh, God'_, thought Penny. _'The things they must have heard!'_ She was quite loud and specific when she had sex with Leonard since he seemed clueless sometimes about what rang her bell. She turned beet red.

"You bugged my apartment! That's illegal and not right. You invaded my privacy and…oh, shit! That means you guys got a good laugh when Leonard and I got busy. I'm so mad I can't even be embarrassed anymore!"

"Hey, once the tapes were analyzed and found to be harmless, they were erased. I think Wolowitz' tapes were the most discussed. He's such a perv!"

They both laughed about that. "How is Howard? He's quite a hero. He's not in any trouble is he?" She detested Howard but didn't want to see him in trouble. And he did warn them about the paintball switch.

"He's down the hall. He'll be interrogated and then probably sent home. He didn't know about the switch and it was thanks to him that the damage done to Dr. Cooper wasn't worse. As it is, his sight might take months to come back but we won't know anything until the specialists from DC get here."

Alex took in the devastated look on Penny's face. Compromised for sure and Sheldon didn't even know it if his actions in the past month were any indication. Come to think of it, Penny didn't know either. She missed the change in his demeanor when she came into the apartment or the way his eyes followed her every movement. Yep, two dumb people dancing around each other without a clue.

"So, Penny, how long have you been in love with Sheldon Cooper?" Penny looked down at the floor and mumbled that she wasn't exactly sure. It had just happened one day out of the blue and she knew, with absolute certainty, that she loved the tall nerdy guy with mega-OCD.

"He's not the kind of guy I'd usually even notice except that every time I've needed him, he's been there for me. Sure, he drives me crazy and sometimes I just want to smack him but other times…he can be sweet and caring, even if he always explains it away as some 'social protocol'."

"He feels something for you, too. I don't know anyone who'd advance on an enemy firing acid at him like he's wearing armor and not several t-shirts. He didn't leave cover until Winkle started firing at _you_ and then, well, we all saw _Sheldor the Conqueror_ make his debut."

_'Why Penny, what good is surviving if_ you're not with us?'

"He's _Homo Novus_ and beyond feelings. He tries to suppress his emotions because they get between him and his work and his precious Nobel Prize. He's never given me any indication that we're more than just friends.

"That's because he's socially retarded! He never had the same experiences normal people have had growing up and socializing. His childhood was a nightmare and he shuts himself off from others because he doesn't want to be hurt. Think, Penny! He probably doesn't understand his feelings and he can't stand not understanding!"

Just then Leonard popped in, surprising Penny with a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey, Penny, good to see you. I just came from Howard's room and man, I heard I missed out on a lot of action. You going all 'Nebraska' on Winkle and saving Sheldon's life."

"No, Leonard. He saved me and Wolowitz and distracted Winkle giving me time to whack her in her ugly damned face with Sheldon' survival bag. Messed the bitch up good, too. You should have seen him, Leonard. He was moving forward and zapping Winkle in the face with paintballs so she couldn't hurt us. He was…magnificent!"

Leonard saw the look on Penny's face and how she was hanging on to Sheldon's hand like he'd disappear or something if she dared let go. He felt a surge of jealousy but tamped it down ruthlessly. He and Penny were not together and obviously she and Sheldon were. He was happy for his friend but still disappointed that what he felt for Penny hadn't been returned.

"Penny's right, Dr. Hofstadter. He was just that. I know agents who wouldn't put it out there for their partner like he did."

"Uh, well, that's great. Yeah, Sheldor the Conqueror. Who'd a thought it? Well, tell him I dropped on by. I'll stop by tomorrow. See ya."

Penny had an unkind thought seeing Leonard leaving but Alex had no such filter.

"If he wasn't so damned needy and whiny, I could almost like the little troll."

They both laughed because they'd been thinking the same thing.

* * *

><p>Sheldon woke up 3 hours later in great pain. His IV bag was empty and the nurse was goofing off someplace and for Penny that was inexcusable so off she went, ready to kick some ass if someone didn't help her…her…Sheldon.<p>

Sheldon sensed that he was alone in the dark and he was in great pain and wondered if his mother had been right and he'd failed Judgment and this was his own personal Hell. He couldn't move either arm and his eyes itched and burned but the worst pain wasn't even physical. If he was alone that meant that somehow Winkle had either killed his friends or hurt them so badly that they couldn't be there. That hurt more than his chest or eyes. Far worse.


	4. Chapter 4

This is for Jislan and Halfred Askold: the only guy who thinks shotguns and girls go together.

This is a transitional chapter and leads into the juicy stuff you all want to read.

Rep

Chapter 4

Previously:

If he was alone that meant that somehow Winkle had either killed his friends or hurt them so badly that they couldn't be there. That hurt more than his chest or eyes. Far worse.

He felt a cool hand grip his right hand and then soft lips briefly caress his own. "Sweetie, I tracked down the nurse and she's bringing in more pain meds. I – I don't know if you can hear me, Moonpie, but I'm so damned proud of you. You're my Sheldor the Conqueror from now on."

He tried to talk but his mouth was dry and his tongue seemed to be glued to the roof of his mouth. "Penmmph", was all that he heard his mouth say and he cringed at how pathetic and needy it sounded.

"Here ya go, sweetie. Some water to cut the gumminess from the anesthesia." He felt a straw against his lips and he sucked down the cool liquid and marveled at how something as simple as water could taste so good.

"Pen –" He started to speak but her fingertips on his lips startled him into silence. "No talking, Sheldon. Just listen, okay, and I'll try and cover all the bases."

Penny gave him a quick summary of their situation and his condition. She also went into some detail about the paintball duel and how it ended.

"Sheldon, the docs here have called in a DC specialist and they have great hopes for your sight. Right now your left hand is in a restraint and I got your right one out to hold it. It's just until you were conscious enough not to try and touch the dressings. I'll undo the left one but right now I just want to hold on to you. I thought, I mean, oh, Sheldon – "

She started to bawl and laid her face on his thigh, still clutching his hand.

Tears! Danger! Kryptonite! Why was she crying?

"Penny, please don't cry. You know I can't stand seeing you cry. Please…I don't know how to…I mean…please, Penny, please stop crying." He wanted to go back to sleep and away from her sobs. Was he dying? Was she trying to make his last moments as comfortable for him as she could? If so, she definitely needed to revamp her plan. The emotional pain was far worse than the physical.

"I'm – I'm sorry, it's just that…you could have been blinded or worse and I just couldn't handle it if anything happened to you, Sheldon. I would just die…"

"Oh, Penny, you know that's far from likely. You're in marvelous physical shape and you're young and the statistical mortality tables indicate at least another 50 years of life if you ease up on the consumption of alcohol and get your 'check engine' light repaired."

"It wouldn't be a life if you weren't in it with me somehow, Sheldon. You're my best friend and…"

"I thought Amy Farrah Fawcett was your 'bestie'?"

"Okay, best _man_ friend then. So you see, you have to get better, okay? Who's going to fix my laptop when I screw it up? Who's going to be my partner for Halo? Who will keep me company when I'm doing laundry in that creepy basement? Who will nag me to get my 'check engine' light repaired? I really need you in my life, Moonpie."

"Penny, I've asked you how many times – "

"Six hundred and thirty-two times. Get over it."

"You _counted?" _He had no idea how many times he'd asked her not to call him 'Moonpie'. Only his Meemaw got to call him that.

"No, but I'll bet it's close. Listen, there's something I need to say and this is the perfect opportunity to do it since you can't run away from me. Sheldon Cooper I lo-"

"Ah, you're awake. Hey, buddy. How are you feeling?" Leonard walked into the room and noted Penny's tear-streaked face and the death grip she had on Sheldon's hand and he felt a pang of jealousy and loss but swallowed his wounded pride and got right down to business.

"Sheldon, I'm here at this facility trying to duplicate the SuperHydrazine for the government's space program. I've run countless trials and I just can't seem to get it right. I've done everything exactly as I did when we put together the batch you dumped into the elevator shaft and nothing works. It either fizzles out or heats up until it explodes!"

Alex walked in behind Leonard and placed a tape recorder on the tray table and identified herself and the date and time and participants.

"Dr. Cooper, Dr. Hofstadter has gone over his notes and his experiment and cannot duplicate the SuperHydrazine. Please go through what you can remember about that night and we'll take your comments and see if we can get this right."

"Alex, you're _NSA_? Are we in some dark hole in the desert?" Sheldon had a basic distrust of the Federal Government although he took their grant money with a smile.

"Yeah, I am, Sheldon. I was sent to look after you when Leonard joined the project." Leonard snorted and Sheldon figured 'joined' meant 'shanghaied'.

He went through all he could remember which was everything, of course. When he got to the part about deceiving Joyce Kim by pouring Mountain Dew into the container that she thought contained the SuperHydrazine both Penny and Alex laughed quietly. It was _so_ Sheldon.

"Then I poured the SuperHydrazine into the almost empty bottle of Mountain Dew – the two liter bottle that was on sale that week. We bought two since the savings – "

"Um, Dr. Cooper, you put the liquid into the 2 liter bottle and then what?" She didn't care about sales and savings. She was after far bigger game.

"Well, while Leonard was out in the hallway 'entertaining' his deceitful Korean Mata Hari, the mixture started to overheat so I devised a magnetic containment field like they used on an episode of Star Trek."

"Sheldon, then what?" Alex didn't want to listen to his lecture on the science fiction being future fact.

"Well, I used what I had at hand - refrigerator magnets. I then carefully observed that the mixture appeared to be cooling. I screwed on the bottle cap and then went out into the hallway and dropped it down the elevator shaft and sent the car down so that it would 'tamp' any explosion."

"Wait a damned minute, Sheldon! You made a 'magnetic containment bottle' using refrigerator magnets and a Mountain Dew bottle?" Leonard's mind was racing in circles. A magnetic containment field?

"Well, of _course_. I couldn't let the mixture explode and take out half of Pasadena! Have you forgotten all that we've learned from Spock? '_The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few'._ It was simple math, Leonard. The two of us versus all those innocents?"

Penny thought her heart would burst with pride. Her Sheldon really was a hero and all this time she never knew.

Leonard just looked at the ceiling with that constipated look he always got when he was trying to figure out just what the hell Sheldon was talking about.

Alex switched off the recorder and looked long and hard at Leonard Hofstadter. He'd been trying to take credit for something he didn't even know about and she found that disgusting.

"Dr. Hofstadter, go back to your lab and use what we've learned here and make the magnetic bottle thing that Dr. Cooper devised and test his hypothesis. I'll be along shortly."

Leonard smiled weakly at Penny and ignored his friend and left. He had to figure out how the hell to devise a 'magnetic containment bottle'.

"Leonard, remember to leave approximately 100ml of Mountain Dew in the bottle. I arranged the magnets in a double-helix pattern and used Scotch tape to stick them on the bottle. I couldn't find the glue since you never put anything back where it belongs when you're through with it."

Leonard just nodded and then left. Penny looked down at her feet, embarrassed that she'd ever let the whiny little troll touch her.

"So, Alex, what happens to me and Penny and Wolowitz now? Going to send us down the rabbit hole and forget about us? Or perhaps it would be much simpler for the government to just kill us in our sleep?"

Penny glanced at Alex and saw her smiling and breathed a sigh of relief. Sheldon was almost paranoid about the government especially after Leonard's cryptic message that he was 'going to work for the government' before he disappeared.

"Oh, Sheldon, we're not like the movies. You'll just go home after swearing never to discuss or reveal anything you might learn or hear. We may ask you for help from time to time but you and Mr. Wolowitz and Penny will be free to resume your lives."

"You never mentioned Raj, Alexandra. What about Rajeesh?"

"He's on his way home to India for a nice vacation and reunion with his family. He's free to return to work as soon as he's able. He wasn't hurt but he is quite upset about all of this – especially since he slept with Tinkle the night before the duel. He feels like he betrayed you all somehow."

"That's utter bull! Raj is as loyal as the next guy. He doesn't want to go back to India because his parents will arrange a marriage and he lacks the backbone to say 'No' to his mother." Penny glanced at Sheldon and muttered, "Like someone else I know."

"I heard that, Penny. Vulcan ears, remember?" He looked smug, at least from the nose down.

"Yeah, Moonpie, how could I ever forget it." His smugness disappeared with 'Moonpie' and was replace by something like…acceptance.

"There is one thing, though, Dr. Cooper. You'll need someone to look after you until the bandages come off. You may need another operation depending on what the DC specialists decide. I could call your mother…"

"No! No, please, she'll drive me batcrap crazy and I'll never have a moment's peace. Penny will stay with me. She can move into Leonard's old room and let her apartment go. Penny, you'll save money and my sanity if you'll please say 'yes'."

Alexandra snorted and Sheldon looked in her general direction wishing he could glare at her. "I'm not crazy. My mommy had me tested – twice."

"But Sheldon, I have a job. I have – " Sheldon interrupted her. "Alex, do you have a laptop that Penny can access?" Alex left the room and brought back a laptop. She interrupted Penny's argument that she had a job and a life and she couldn't be with him all the time. What if he fell? What if someone broke into the apartment? He needed a full-time companion."

"Penny, be quiet. Now bring up the internet and go to my bank's website. You should know it by now since we use the same bank. Enter my account number and password. The account number is 7073002546."

Penny did as she was instructed. The wireless connection was superfast and she was into the account log-in section in seconds.

"Okay, what's the password?" She looked at Sheldon and swore he was blushing. "Sheldon, I promise not to loot your bank account, sweetie. You can change the password when we get home."

"Pennyblossoms." Yep, he was definitely blushing. Alex had no clue what was going on between them but Penny's smile illuminated the room.

"Sheldon, that's so sweet of you. Okay, I'm in – whoa! Holy shit! You're freaking rich!"

"I'm freaking _frugal_, save as much of my paycheck each month as possible – as I've tried to get you to do – and I have some investments as well as a savings account. Eight years at Caltech with nothing much to spend it on, so yes, Penny, I guess I'm freaking rich."

"So now what?" Penny had no clue what this was all about but Alex thought she might.

"I want to hire you to be my companion, my 'seeing eye' – " Penny growled at him and muttered that she was no body's seeing eye dog but Sheldon continued. "My 'seeing eye companion', Penny. I'll pay you twice the salary you got waiting tables, including tips, and I'll pay for all utilities, rent, clothing and food."

"Sheldon, I don't know…" Alex watched the emotions flicker across Penny's face and almost laughed. She was trying to sound doubtful when the smile on her face screamed 'Yes!'

Sheldon pulled out all the stops. "And shoes, Penny. I'll include a bonus arrangement for shoes. Please?"

"Um, okay, Sheldon. I'll do it. I'll feel a lot better knowing that you're being looked after by someone who knows you and your schedule."

A/N: And that's the real beginning of the story that will be covered in the next few chapters.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry for the delays. R/L sux right now.

* * *

><p>Chapter 5<p>

Secure facility

Leonard's experiments were going nowhere. He'd duplicated the steps Sheldon had outlined but the longest he could get the containment field to hold was less than 10 seconds, a lot less than the time Sheldon had managed in the apartment. In three weeks he'd managed to fail a total of sixty-five times. Sheldon told him to 'buck up' because he'd discovered sixty-five ways it wouldn't work. That cut the odds down significantly.

He didn't appreciate Sheldon's attempts to cheer him up, not when Penny was by his side, her arm through his, guiding him around. She looked amazingly happy and Sheldon wasn't nearly as snarky as he'd been before but all that zipped right over his head.

Howard had dropped by to say hello and goodbye. Leonard had been almost surly to his friend and Howard had forgotten what a pain in the ass Leonard could be when things weren't going his way. After exchanging the usual pleasantries, Howard walked down to Sheldon's room to say goodbye and offer to check on his apartment and bring him his mail.

He wasn't in his room but Penny was. "He's having some work done on the acid burn on his chest, Howard. I don't know how long he'll be. They – they wouldn't let me go with him."

Wolowitz knew what that entailed – pulling off the dead or damaged skin and then cleaning the wound. He shuddered sympathetically.

"He's going to be sore and grumpy, Penny. It's a painful procedure. I saw a documentary in college about it at a safety lecture. Don't be too hard on him, okay?" He didn't mention that he'd been through the same procedures several times and he didn't have a Penny to help him through it.

"I never got to thank you for what you did, Howard. I know Sheldon thinks you're somewhat of a hero now. I agree. That took guts, especially when Winkle was shooting at us."

Howard looked down at the floor in embarrassment. He'd wanted to beat Cooper in the worst kind of way, but never to hurt him like Winkle planned.

"Yeah, well, he's my friend although he does aggravate the crap out of me with his attitude about me not having a PhD but…he's still my friend and I'd never allow any of you to be hurt by my inaction. I had to let you guys know."

Penny explained about the new arrangement and Howard was glad Sheldon would have a friend as his 'companion' although he thought 'babysitter' when she said the word. Either way, he knew it would piss Leonard off and he didn't want to be around when he found out about it. He'd had his shot at the delicious blonde and blown it. Leonard needed to 'man up' and let it go.

Penny was 'taken' even if the idiot who had her didn't know it. The way she'd cried when he was hurt wasn't just because he was her friend.

Nope. She was in love.

"When you guys get out of here, call me. I'll get some guys from the Comic Book store together and move Leonard's crap into your place and your stuff into Sheldon's. Spring for pizza and beer and they'll be your slaves. Wear something sexy and _I'll_ be your slave…"

"Howard, you were being so nice and then you had to ruin it…" She didn't like the idea of the sweatpants guy in her apartment, touching her things…

"Yeah, well, I gotta limp on out of here. The government's given my Ma a line of bull and I'm sure she's got a million questions and complaints and," he shuddered visibly, "and I'm sure she'll need her back waxed."

Penny got a sick look on her face but hugged him and sent him on his way to the airport. It was nice of him to offer to help them switch up the apartments. She hadn't thought much about it. She was certain Sheldon would have a 'relocation schedule' worked out once he thought about it.

* * *

><p>[AN: We're going to fly ahead a few weeks but with flashbacks to keep continuity with the story. Gotta get them out of the hospital so they can begin canoodling.]

Sheldon felt safe for the first time since he'd been burned. Oh, he felt _safe_ in the hospital with Penny beside him but it still was a trial for him to get through every day not being able to see.

His nurses were all very considerate – and that was no stretch of the word – since he'd been OCD'ing all over the place. Nothing about the hospital routine fit into his preconceived notion of a 'day in the life of Sheldon Cooper, PhD' and if Penny hadn't been there to mitigate things, he'd have probably gone insane or catatonic.

Take for example – personal cleanliness.

_"Dr. Cooper, I'm Mary, and I'll be your nurse for this shift. I just wanted to introduce myself and find out if there's anything you need. I know this is all very unsettling for you but your girlfriend has been very helpful in letting us know all about your need for order in your world."_

_"She's not my girlfriend. And I – "_

_"Hmmm. Okay. Now, first things first. I'm going to give you a sponge bath and redress your chest burn and then get you up and seated in a chair while I change your linens. I'll be gentle and fast and we'll be done before you know it."_

_"I am quite capable of performing my own ablutions, Nurse Mary. I'm 29 years old and have been on my own since I was 11 and I'm quite capable of washing myself if you'll just point me to the shower."_

_"I'm a 61 year old mother and grandmother and I've seen more bare bottoms than the Port of Long Beach so just lie there and I'll do the work. I know this is very uncomfortable for you so I'll be quick about it."_

_Somehow her age made a difference and Sheldon acquiesced and before he knew it he was washed, redressed and back in bed._

_"Thank you, Nurse Mary. That was not as uncomfortable as I thought it might be."_

_"Well, Dr. Cooper, I guess I should thank you. I'll be around to check your vitals and your dressings. Have a nice day."_

_She walked out into the hallway and spied Penny leaning against the wall. She and Penny had talked at length about Dr. Cooper and they'd hit it off really well._

_"He's all yours. I have to say it – I'm envious of you. He's hung like a – "_

_"Mary, that's not something I need to hear. I'm just his friend."_

_"Keep telling yourself that, Penny, but I've seen how you look at him. You're girl in love with a guy," she sing-songed in glee._

_They were the same age and body type. She'd lied to Sheldon but figured it would ease things a bit for the highly-strung genius if he thought she was an old grandmother and she was right. He envisioned her as looking like his Mee-Maw when he thought of her at all._

During his hospital stay, Leonard visited him almost daily, usually when Penny was either running errands getting something to eat in the cafeteria. He had a routine. And he wanted to avoid seeing Penny fawning all over Sheldon. That's what he called it in his thoughts – fawning.

_"Sheldon, how are you this morning? Listen, I've failed again – it's so damned frustrating. Buddy, I wish you could see. Maybe I'm positioning the magnets wrong. Maybe the amount of Mountain Dew in the bottle isn't the same amount left the first time. I just don't know what to do."_

_"Do you have the containment bottle with you? If not, please bring it here along with the magnets, the tape and your test sample of the SuperHydrazine. I'll see what I can do."_

_Leonard flinched when his friend said that last sentence. He knew Sheldon better than anyone and knew the strain he was under. Frustration at not being able to see…it's a wonder he hadn't exploded in rage at the world's treatment of him._

"Better yet, Leonard, help me into the wheelchair and wheel me down to the lab. If we're unsuccessful, there's no place here to put the mixture if it overheats and explodes. I don't want innocent people paying for my failure."

_Once in the lab, Sheldon asked Leonard some questions and then asked for the containment bottle, the magnets and the Scotch tape saying that 'things must be as exact as they were when we first did this'._

_When Leonard handed him the bottle, Sheldon froze, then told him 'what part of exact don't you understand? I removed the Mountain Dew from our refrigerator. This bottle is at room temperature. I thought I made that clear in my description of my actions that fateful day.'_

_Two hours later, after putting a full bottle into the lab refrigerator and waiting for it to cool, they were ready to try the experiment._

_"Leonard, you'll need to be my eyes. My hand/eye coordination is shot all to Hell." Leonard just stared at him._

_"Sheldon, did you just make a joke?"_

_"Bazinga! Really, Leonard, you need to lighten up. Try listing the elements from the Periodic Table in order of discovery to give your conscious mind something to work on thus freeing your subconscious to soar and discover."_

_Leonard snorted a laugh. "Whatever, Sheldon." He'd missed the snark that made things comfortable between them._

_While Leonard was mulling over Sheldon's 'advice', he watched as his blind friend positioned the bottle on the table and said, 'Fetch a container to hold the unneeded Mountain Dew I pour out. A clean container as we might as well refresh ourselves with a glass of Mountain Dew, the elixir of inspiration.'_

_He judged the remainder as 'nearly approximate to what remained that fateful day' and then began placing the magnets in the pattern he remembered, taping each in place._

_"Leonard, bring me the SuperHydrazine and then remove yourself to shelter. I'll add the liquid and put it in the test vault and join you." He put on heavy insulated gloves and reached for the bottle and a small plastic funnel. Leonard brought over the SuperHydrazine and started pouring the mixture into the containment bottle. He was still amazed that it had worked even once. Twice would be astounding._

_"Sheldon, you're in wheelchair and blind. How will you be able to find the exit? I'll stay here and – "_

_"No! Go to the secure shelter. If it works we can shout 'Eureka' together and if it doesn't, it'll just be another failure but it will serve my purposes. Go, Leonard. I don't want your fate on my conscience. I'm blind and death will be a release of sorts."_

_"Sheldon, quit being so damned melodramatic and give me the damned bottle. I'll pour in the rest of the stuff and you get to the shelter. The test vault will contain any blast but we have to follow protocols as outlined in the experiment controls."_

_"Get out, Leonard. Tell Penny - " He screwed the lid on the bottle and gave it a gentle shake just as he had that day in Pasadena and then Leonard grabbed the Mountain Bottle and put it into the test vault and pushed Sheldon out the door._

_Ten minutes later they were congratulating themselves on keeping the containment bottle functioning. Neither understood what was different until Sheldon mentioned that he'd 'shaken the bottle a bit out of force of habit and that the release of carbonation into the small space must have done something to alter the outcome._

_He was released to home care the next day and Leonard went back to the lab with a chemical engineer to assist him in fabricating a Cooper-Hofstadter Magnetic Containment Vessel or CHMCV for short._

* * *

><p>Penny walked out of her new bedroom and spotted her guy sitting on 'his' spot and plopped down to him. "Hey, sweetie, I'll bet you're glad to be home, aren't you?"<p>

"Yes. I find that my surroundings have broken the back of my depression. You've been of immense help, Penny, and I know I have been difficult to be with but I do appreciate you efforts."

"That's alright, Sheldon. It's nice be home and I think I'll really like living here with you. Um, Sheldon, I think you need a shower. They sent you home wearing what's left of your paintball clothes and they – they smell."

Sheldon lifted up his arm and sniffed and almost gagged. His senses were really off the scale. Losing his sight, even temporarily (or so they kept assuring him) seemed to ramp up his other senses. "Rotten eggs. The smell of the acid. Excuse me, Penny, but I'm going to shower now. Thank you for pointing it out. For some reason I didn't notice it until you mentioned it."

"Um, Sheldon, I'll need to be in there while you shower. You got sick coming home in the car because of the motion and I don't want to risk you getting hurt if you get dizzy. I'll just sit on the toilet seat in case you need me."

Sheldon had suffered from severe vertigo on the drive home. The first leg by air hadn't been a problem but when they picked up Penny's car, the turns and stopping and starting left him dizzy. And sick.

"I'm quite capable of bathing myself, Penny, as I have been since I was 4. Now, it's been a long day and I'm sure you'd like a nap. I'll be okay." In actuality he was worried about dizziness and trying to figure out how to keep his dressings dry.

"And Mary from the hospital gave me some things for you to wear in the shower to protect your eyes and your…wound." She hated the word. She hated the cause and she hated the bitch Winkle who'd caused them. The first time she saw the raw puckered scar on his chest she'd left the room rather than let him see her cry.

"I suppose that's for the best. However, please don't peak, Penny. It's not polite." He'd peaked. But that was different. He could still remember how soft her 'elbow' had felt when he helped her up and out of her tub when she'd fallen and dislocated her shoulder.

_**[A/N: This part is definitely 'M' rated so kiddies, skip it. I don't want to reclassify the fic 'M' for just one itsy-bitsy bit of sexiness.]**_

Penny sat on the toilet seat lid and watched as Sheldon stripped off his clothes and left them in a pile on the floor. They'd agreed that the clothes would find a home in the trash. She watched as he leaned over and adjusted the water before stepping into the tub and pulling the shower curtain closed. If she was being totally honest, the sight of his lean body made her feel butterflies in her stomach. And when he'd unconsciously turned and presented her with what the films called 'full frontal nudity', she gasped.

"Penny?" His damned Vulcan hearing. "Nothing, sweetie. Just picking at a hangnail and pulled the wrong way. You okay in there?"

He wore a plastic adhesive patch over his almost-healed burn and water-tight goggles that protected his eyes.

"Pen – I'm dizzy." She was into the tub and standing behind him in a flash and wrapped her arms around his chest, careful to avoid his dressing. "I've got you, Sheldon. I won't let you fall." The hot water was coursing over them and her tank top and shorts were quickly soaked.

"Sheldon, lean forward and put both palms against the wall and I'll wash your back and then, when you feel better, you can do the front. I'll shampoo your hair, too, so you can keep your hands on the wall for balance."

Sheldon was so relieved that he hadn't fallen and that Penny had once again saved him that he made no attempt to disagree. Penny pulled off her tank top and shorts and then grabbed the body wash and a soft wash cloth and began washing his back, shoulders and down his legs.

She took the hand-held shower head and rinsed off his back and legs and then said "Sheldon, I'm going to wet your hair and wash it." She was so turned on after running her hands over his body that she seriously considered just turning the shower on herself.

Feeling brave and horny, she took off her bra and threw it out onto the bathroom floor smiling when she heard Sheldon's voice in her head say _'That's a strike, Penny'._

"Sheldon, I'm going to twist around in front of you, sweetie, so I can wash your hair, okay?" _And maybe check out what Mary thought was such a big deal._

Sheldon stood up abruptly to object but was immediately dizzy and started to sway. Penny wrapped her arms around him and whispered, "I'm right here, baby. I won't let you fall. Trust me, Sheldon. Lean against the wall again. I've got you." She was suddenly aware of her bare breasts against his warm, wet back and her nipples hardened.

"I – I trust you. I just – okay, you may wash my hair, Penny, but remember your promise!" His voice was shaky and Penny felt a rush of warmth for him. Okay, maybe, just maybe, she might be just a wee little bit in love with her Moon Pie.

Sheldon was well aware of her state of undress. Those soft cushiony bodies pressed against him sent blood flowing southward and when he felt her nipples harden…

Penny slipped under his arm and then squeezed a generous amount of shampoo onto his head and began lathering his hair all the while gazing down at his throbbing erection… _I should have dumped the panties, too. Oh My God…like a horse!_

She rinsed off his hair with a shaky hand and then relathered it. There was something so sensual in the act that she knew she was going to do something stupid but she couldn't help herself.

She rubbed the shampoo suds over his shoulders and chest, careful not to touch his covered burn. Penny slowly moved her sudsy hands down across his stomach, letting her thumb circle his belly button several times. She heard a strangled sound and looked up and saw that Sheldon was biting his lower lip and looking upwards. She silently giggled at his expression.

"Pen – "

"Shhh, honey. Just let me take care of you. Please. I want to do this and you need it."

Not waiting for an answer she began stroking him and cupping his balls. She heard what might have been a strangled moan but she had her hands full and just kept enjoying the power she suddenly had over her genius. His hips bucked forward thrusting himself into her two sudsy fists and she knew he was close.


	6. Chapter 6

She knew he was close and if she was honest with herself, so was _she._ She felt herself beginning to get the sudden heat that signaled an orgasm and she wrapped one arm around Sheldon and held him tightly, reveling in what she was doing to her genius as much as the feel of his shaft in her hand and the warmth and smoothness of his skin under her cheek.

"Oh, God, Sheldon…" She almost said it. Those condemning words that would send him screaming for his room and 'safety'.

"Penny - Penny – Penny," he chanted in a whisper and wrapped one arm around her back, holding her as closely to him as he could. Their 7-in difference in height made it a perfect fit. Her hand was trapped between them and still wrapped around his softening length.

She was mortified now that she'd come down from her own blissfulness. Sheldon still held her and she could feel his body shaking. Penny took the showerhead and ran warm water over both of them and rinsed his hair of the last of the shampoo suds and the evidence of his release off her stomach and breasts.

"Sheldon, sweetie, let me get out first and get a towel and dry you off. Just stay leaning against the wall. I don't want you to fall or slip."

"Penny, I have my ducks…" He didn't know what else to say. He never felt anything like it before. "Yeah, yeah, Moon Pie, I know. I remember the whimsical duck appliqués to increase friction and prevent accidents." Her voice had taken on a strangely hard tone, one she certainly didn't feel but he was quick to pick up on it.

Pity. She'd done it out of pity and because…it was the job he was paying her to do. Well, not to do _that_, exactly, but knowing Penny, she'd just take the matter into her own hands just as she'd done and now she felt disgust for it and him.

_I am supposed to be homo Novus but instead I'm just a blind man with few prospects for a decent future. I've lost my chance at the Nobel Prize and I probably don't even have a job any longer…and soon I won't have Penny either._

Penny wished she could look into Sheldon's eyes and mind to know what he was thinking. She gently toweled off his body and handed him his clean clothes and picked up hers and the stinking rags and left him alone. She felt ashamed for taking advantage of him but it had been an experience she would treasure since she doubted she'd ever have the opportunity to touch him so intimately again.

* * *

><p>Dinner was spaghetti with those little hot dog slices he liked and she made garlic bread as well as a salad. He'd always asked her to leave whenever he ate in the hospital and now she knew why. He was blind and couldn't see where his food was and he couldn't abide with his various foods touching one another.<p>

"Sheldon, I've arranged the plate with the spaghetti at 6 o'clock and the garlic bread at noon and your salad is at noon in a small bowl with the dressing you like already on it. Your iced tea is to your right at 10 o'clock. Your utensils are where they usually are. I know it's hard for you, honey, but you need to eat and not worry about a mess. That's why I'm here, remember, Sheldon?"

"Thank you, Penny. I suppose I'd better get used to being helpless. I don't think the doctors were telling me the truth. I could hear their dissembling in their tone of voice. I guess I need to learn Braille. I have no job and no hope of ever winning the Nobel Prize. Sometimes I wish Leonard had left me there when one of the containers failed."

Penny was shocked and without thinking she slapped Sheldon hard across the face, almost knocking him out of his chair. She burst into tears at what she'd done and why and left the table. Sheldon heard her bedroom door slam and knew he'd significantly aggravated his companion.

His cheek stung from her slap but not as much as his heart stung from hearing her sobs. He didn't know what to do. He'd only told her the truth. His future was dim because all his ideas, computations and formulae were trapped inside his head with no whiteboards to record them on.

"Penny?" Light knocks. "Penny?" He stopped, aggravated with himself. Of course she was angry with him. He was her meal ticket until something better came along and…and he desperately hoped that was his depression talking and not the Voice of Reason. He was still flustered by the events in the shower. Penny was a compassionate person and she gave him what she thought he needed without concern. He wished he could be more emotionally spontaneous but he'd learned the hard way that the safest way to get through every day was to 'fly under the radar'.

"Penny, please…" She jerked open the door and looked at him but realized that he had no idea what his words had done to her. She laid the palm of her hand on the cheek she'd slapped to soothe it and her heart broke when he flinched and stepped back from her.

She was a hugger and so she hugged him, burying her face in his chest and just hanging on, sobbing that she was sorry.

"It tears me up to see you so down and me not being able to do anything to make you feel better. You'll get your sight back, honey, and you'll win the damned Nobel Peace Prize and more. I just know it, Sheldon. You're not made to fail."

"Please help me with dinner. I – I know you didn't mean to slap me and I'll be sure to keep my self pity to myself."

"It's not self pity, Sheldon, it's just your brain being unable to do what it needs to do. I can't imagine what you're feeling but I just know that the world needs Sheldon Cooper."

"I'm not certain about the world but I need you right now, Penny, to be my…my guide through this time of turmoil. Come on, cold spaghetti is disgusting."

She knew he was trying and she felt closer to him than ever before. He _needed _her and she needed him just as much.

* * *

><p>Sheldon was sitting in his spot staring at nothing at all when his cell rang. He fumbled around but couldn't locate it and then remembered it was on the kitchen counter. He got up and walked purposely to the counter relying on his incredible memory but forgot about the chair he'd left pulled out from the dinner table.<p>

Penny walked out of the bathroom after 'fixing her face' ruined by her crying jag just as Sheldon tripped over the chair and fell face down on the floor.

"Sheldon!" She ran over to him to help him up. She saw his shoulders shaking and was afraid he'd broken down emotionally or hurt himself but when she rolled him over he was laughing – not his usual laugh that sounded like a pig with a sinus infection – no this was a full-throated belly laugh.

She helped him up and then went to answer his phone.

"Sheldon, it's Dr. Gablehauser – " She held out the phone to Sheldon who was trying to quit laughing. He'd probably refer to this in his memoirs as _'the moment I became human'_ but for now, he just needed to take a deep breath and go back to being "Sheldon".

Dr. Gablehauser wanted to see him in the afternoon at his convenience in his office and he was to make sure he brought his 'companion' with him. They had a unique opportunity to discuss. 'At his convenience' turned out to be 2pm.

"You mean I'm not fired?" Sheldon was a practical man and wondered why the university would retain someone who was useless.

His boss laughed. "Of course not. And besides, your breakthrough work on the CMCV is revolutionary and opens up incredible new opportunities for science – and for the university's government funding."

"The what? The CM…"

"Oh, perhaps you don't recognize your own work. The Cooper Magnetic Containment Vessel. So, I'll see you tomorrow, Dr. Cooper. Wear a suit. And not a plaid one."

Penny had been shamelessly eavesdropping and could hardly contain her joy. When he hung up, she hugged him from behind and whispered in his ear that he was _not _a failure.

"Sheldon, we need to go to the Mall. You need a new dress shirt and a tie and a haircut. C'mon, Sweet Pea, we only have two hours to shop!"

"Penny, I am not going to the Mall at this hour of the night. I have a shirt and tie and I don't want a haircut."

"Sheldon Lee Cooper, you _will_ get off your ass and change into something less…casual, and you will accompany me to the Mall." She realized that he was embarrassed about his 'condition' and she softened her unseen glare and her tone of voice.

"Baby, it'll be okay. I'll be with you every step of the way and you can wear those cool aviator shades and I'll just hang onto your arm and guide you. Please, Shel, for me?"

"Fine. I will go change. Uh, Penny, could you lay out my clothes? I can't tell what I'm wearing." He had a sad look on his face after realizing he couldn't even dress himself properly.

"You betcha, sweetie. Oh, Shel, I know you'll get your sight back. It's just a matter of time. You'll see."

* * *

><p>The Mall<p>

Penny selected a crisp white shirt with French cuffs, a red and blue regimental striped tie and cuff links. Next she dragged him to a shoe store and resisted the urge to try on shoes and bought him a pair of black Florsheim men's shoes after asking an older man what kind of shoes were 'professional'.

"Okay, Shel, next stop is the barber shop and then we'll head back to the apartment. Um, is there anything else you might need?" She had a fairly good grasp of his wardrobe (pathetic) but wanted to give him _some_ control over things.

"I'm good. You had this planned out efficiently, Penny, and I congratulate you on your foresight." He resisted the dig that maybe he was rubbing off on her. No sense aggravating her when she'd been so nice to him. _It's her job, her paycheck, nothing more._

He absolutely hated his 'Voice of Reason'. It was a real joy-sucker, a term he'd heard Penny use once or twice.

Penny talked with the stylist before Sheldon got too antsy and then sat back and watched as the girl turned his slicked down hair cut into something worthy of him ( in her humble opinion). When she was done, she turned the chair around and Penny gasped…he looked…good, really, really good.

* * *

><p>They passed the remainder of the evening in companionable silence. Sheldon worked on some computations he thought might better explain just how the containment bottle worked while Penny alternated between a new <em>Cosmopolitan<em> magazine and watching her guy as he worked complicated computations in his head. She could tell when he did that because even when he had his sight he would close his eyes and the tip of his tongue would slip out of the corner giving him the most adorable look.

"Penny, I'm going to take a shower and then go to bed. Could you please set my alarm for 7am? I can't see to do it."

"Oh, crap, I almost forgot! While you were getting your hair cut I slipped out and bought you a present – it's only temporary, honey, but I figured you needed a watch." She pawed through the bags and found her 'present' that she'd bought with her own money.

She opened the box and checked that it was set up properly and then said "Give me your arm, sweetie." He looked at her and held out his arm and she slipped the present around his wrist and then sat back, smiling.

"Touch it, Shel. It's a Vox Watch. It has buttons on the side. Touch one." He pushed a button and grinned when the 'watch' announced 'The time is exactly 9:47:23pm'.

"Oh, Penny!" He pushed another button and heard 'The temperature is currently 74F and the outlook is partly cloudy with a 20% probability of rain'.

He was so touched by her thoughtfulness that he leaned over and kissed her cheek. His lips lingered a little longer than a 'peck' but it was spontaneous and Penny's face broke out in a huge smile and she was almost brought to tears by his gesture.

"Shel, it's only temporary until you get your sight back so don't get used to it." She touched her cheek where he'd kissed her. She could still feel impression his soft lips made.

She stood up and took his hand and led him into his bedroom to get ready to take his shower. He was hesitant, not knowing exactly what a 'shower' entailed in Penny's mind and she could see his face and smiled softly at his confusion. In her mind, a shower was the perfect opportunity to explore intimacy with him. She wanted him but knew he'd bolt if she just came right out and said "I love you, Shel, and I want to make love to you."

She wrapped her arms around him and whispered that she'd sit on the toilet seat in case he needed 'a hand' and then giggled at how his face turned red but he couldn't hide the hint of a smile.

"Penny, the Dramamine you so thoughtfully provided for car rides hasn't worn off. I hope I won't be subject to another bout of vertigo but I appreciate your gesture."

Penny was an enigma wrapped in a beautiful package and he wished he were man enough to tell her how he felt but was afraid of losing her companionship if he blurted out, "Penny, I think I love you." He knew he was not her 'type' and that she was making the best of her situation as his 'companion'.

She saw a wave of sadness cross his face before he caught himself. She wished she could read his mind so that she'd know what had suddenly chilled the mood between them. Had she really messed up by touching him so intimately?

Sheldon had taken off his clothes, placed them in the laundry hamper, ignoring her presence. Apparently he lost his sense of modesty when he'd lost his sight.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Previously:

_Had she really messed up by touching him so intimately?_

_Sheldon had taken off his clothes, placed them in the laundry hamper, ignoring her presence. Apparently he lost his sense of modesty when he'd lost his sight._

Penny adjusted the water for him and stepped away but held onto his arm as he stepped into the tub. "Thank you, Penny. I think I can handle it from here." He pulled the Periodic Table shower curtain closed and she sat down on the closed toilet lid and leaned over, her chin in her hand and waited. And waited.

"Penny, I'm…dizzy…" and she was behind him in a flash, still clothed but with her arms wrapped around him. His head was hanging down between his extended arms and he looked so…defeated.

"It's okay, Shel, I won't let you fall. I think we need to consider baths from now on." She pressed a kiss into his back and felt him sigh.

"Penny, you know how I find baths distasteful and unhygienic. One sits in a tepid pool of one's own dead epithelial cells and Lord knows what else…no, I have got to conquer this dizziness."

Still pressed against him, she thought about his situation. "Sheldon, think of this as an experiment. Determine the variables that are present in the shower but not in other circumstances. You don't get dizzy walking around the apartment so what is it about a shower that's different?"

"Interesting. I hadn't thought about that. Thank you, Penny. That was quite insightful." He felt her lips smile against his back and once again his emotions betrayed him. He felt uncertain about all that was happening. He didn't like uncertainty. He demanded facts and he was unable to do so in his current state.

"Shel, you have little bits of hair all over your neck and back. I'll rinse them off and then let's see if you're still dizzy, okay?" Once again she took off her tank top and her bra, and then took the shower wand and rinsed off his neck and shoulders. She reached over his shoulder and found the body wash and washed his neck and shoulders and rinsed the soap off.

"Okay, wash your front and I'll be right here if you get dizzy again. Trust me, sweetheart, I won't let you fall."

She put the body wash in his hand and placed hers on either hip, stepping back a bit to give him room to move. He was fine until he lifted his right leg to wash it and she felt him start to fall and she snaked her arms around his waist. "I've got you. Finish up and then I'll wash your hair."

He didn't say anything. He was too busy trying to compute the cube root of Pi out to the 15th decimal place but his body had other ideas. Those amazingly soft pillowing bodies pressed against his back were his undoing.

She washed his hair after asking him to lean his arms against the wall and bend his head down. She washed and then rinsed his hair. She couldn't help herself and so she peeked at him and stifled a giggle. She could tell each beat of his heart by the throb of his cock. She was tempted to give him a repeat performance of the last shower but he stopped her.

"Your turn, Penny. Get your shampoo. I'll wash your hair. It's only right since I soaked you because of a balance problem."

She nodded, almost speechless, and then stepped out of the tub and pulled off her soaking wet shorts and panties and grabbed her shampoo and conditioner. She didn't think he'd do anything but a girl had to be ready for anything – especially when dealing with someone as complex as Sheldon.

She stepped back into the shower and got her hair wet and then squeezed a generous amount of shampoo into the palm of his hand. He leaned back against the wall and beckoned her to turn around and lean back against him. "It will keep me from losing my balance, Penny."

She sighed as his long fingers massaged the shampoo into her long blonde hair. The feel of them on her scalp was pure bliss. He kneaded the shampoo lather through her hair and soon her hair was squeaky clean but she was so damned hot that she thought she could see steam rising off her skin.

"I believe that about does it for tonight, Penny. If you'll hand me a towel, I'll let you finish your hair with your blow dryer." She almost lost it but remembered just who she was with and sighed again and handed him a clean towel.

"Thank you, Penny." He smiled in her general direction and then fumbled his way to his bedroom. Penny considered her level of arousal and frustration and almost ran after him but stopped herself. He wasn't nearly ready for anything as remotely physical as 'coitus'.

_'Thank God I got new batteries…'_

* * *

><p>Sheldon was frustrated that he couldn't do anything and he felt demeaned in Penny's eyes. To regain 'lost face' he decided to make her breakfast.<p>

Everything was fine until Penny walked in and leaned up and kissed him on the cheek as a 'good morning' and he lost his concentration and put his hand down onto the hot griddle where the eggs were frying beside strips of bacon.

He yelped in pain and instinctively put his burned fingers in his mouth but Penny was quicker and whipped open the freezer door and took out two small ice cubes and placed them in her mouth and grabbed his damaged fingers and shoved them into her mouth and then sucked on them.

Sheldon gave a gasp as much from the icy relief as from the thrill he felt all the way down to his toes when Penny ran her cold tongue around each of his fingertips.

'_I wish I had a picture of the look on his face right now. He looks like he's in heaven.'_

"Um, Penny, perhaps I should put some burn crème on my fingers. Not that I think your method is bad, it's just that…Penny, stop that noise. You sound like a small child with a lollypop."

She gave a muffled laugh and then took his index finger and examined the tip. Yep, a blister was forming. She enveloped the finger in her mouth and sucked on it letting her cold moist tongue soothe the burn. It was the only finger that had blistered.

Sheldon couldn't decide what to do. The feelings she evoked in him were…unsettling…and yet he wished she was doing it for him instead of for his money. He pulled his finger free and groped his way to the bathroom and the first aid kit. He couldn't figure out which tube contained the burn ointment and chose one and ended up putting Dr. Beaudreaux' Butt Paste on it.

Penny just laughed to herself. _Bazinga! Send me to bed feeling all hot and bothered, will ya!_

Sheldon was getting dressed for his appointment but couldn't find any buttons on the cuffs of his dress shirt. In fact, the damned shirtsleeves were at least 3 inches too long. Angrily, he called Penny to help him. He was so tired of being blind.

"Yeah, Sweet Pea, need a hand?" She could see the problem. He couldn't. "Here, baby, hold on a sec. These are French cuffs and they don't have buttons." She found the box of cuff links where she'd left it and had things all done up properly in seconds. "There ya go, Shel. Now for the tie and you're ready to go." She found the tie she's bought and told him to sit on the bed. She knelt down behind him and tied the tie using a double Windsor just like her daddy used to use.

"Okay, go sit in the living room while I finish getting dressed. And quit worrying! You still have your job and all Dr. Gablehauser wants is to discuss some new opportunities. You should be looking forward to this meeting."

"I look forward to anything, Penny. Anything at all. I miss seeing things, I miss seeing you smile and roll your eyes and…I'm so afraid I'm not going to be able to see again!"

She didn't know what to say. She felt the exact same way he felt but it wasn't her eyes that had been blinded and it wasn't his smile she'd never see again. Once again, she felt the pressure behind her eyes and in her heart.

"Sheldon, you listen to me! You will get your sight back. You will see me smile and roll my eyes and look at you the same way you look at me. We're together in this, Sweet Pea, until this is resolved."

She led him into the kitchen and sat him down at the counter and handed him a bottle of water. "Drink up while I get all beautiful for your meeting with the head hooking bull. I'll just be a second."

She walked into her room and opened her closet door and pulled out a pair of black pinstriped pants and a white dress shirt and a scarf. Alex had called her earlier in the morning and gave her a heads' up on the meeting and told her to 'dress like you're rich and belong by his side'. He was being given tenure and an award and the entire science and engineering faculty were going to be in attendance.

'_I do belong by his side whether he realizes it yet or not. He's mine. I don't care if he's blind or has x-ray vision. The crazy wonderful whackadoodle is mine!'_

She slipped on a pair of open-toed shoes with 4" heels and dabbed perfume in all the places he might have reason to sniff and put on lip gloss and heavy eye makeup. She wanted to look good so that no one would question her presence with him.

She wore her hair down and straight because he seemed to follow her with his eyes when she did so. Taking a agate pendant necklace from her meager collection of jewelry, she walked out into the living room.

"Shel, can you help me with this necklace, please? I can never get the clasp right."

She handed him the necklace and then twisted around and lifted her hair. Sheldon leaned down and brought the ends of the necklace around her neck and she caught her breath when he breathed deeply into her hair. She could feel herself trembling as he fumbled with the clasp, finally closing it. He rested his palms on her shoulders and leaned down and kissed her ear whispering, 'You must look beautiful, Penny, because you _smell_ beautiful'.

Then he stopped and spun her around. "Penny, why aren't you wearing your diamond studs that Leonard gave you?" She blushed but didn't answer. She was horribly embarrassed. She'd pawned them to make her rent one month when business and tips were down.

"Sheldon, I had to make my rent so I…pawned them."

"Well, we'll stop by the pawn shop and get them back for you. Your ears should be properly adorned. Those earrings were the one thing about your relationship with Leonard of which I approved."

Dr. Gablehauser met them in the foyer of his office. Sheldon couldn't see the look on the face of the secretary but Penny could and she unconsciously pulled him closer to her. She'd seen the look before – she'd probably shot the same look at guys she wanted to sleep with in the past but that was BS – before Sheldon.

"Dr. Cooper, er, Sheldon, it's marvelous to see you. Now, let's get started and then I have a meeting I'd like you to attend with me – oh, and of course you too, Miss – "

"Penny. She is my companion." Sheldon had felt her tense up when Gablehauser spoke to her and he hastened to comfort her as best he could. He wasn't exactly comfortable himself.

"Fine. Well, Sheldon, I've got a marvelous opportunity to discuss with you. Dr. Fleming-Rouse is retiring and this has opened up a vacancy in our faculty. We're offering you a 30% increase in salary and full tenure. You'll only have to teach three sections per semester and that will allow you ample time for research and publication. Will you accept?"

"Dr. Gablehauser, I'm blind and there is no guarantee that I'll get my sight back. I can't – "

"Yes, he accepts. It's what he always wanted. He'll have to have an assistant or an aide but I'm sure you can work something out to meet his unique needs, can't you?" Penny was _not_ going to let her man pass on the opportunity of a lifetime. No way, Jose.

"Well, Penny, would you be willing to assume that role? The position, being only part-time, would pay the same as a Graduate Assistant and I'm sure Dr. Cooper will have no difficulties with you by his side. So, I'm pleased that that's settled. Starting in September, Professor Sheldon Cooper will grace us with his presence. Now, Sheldon, there are some colleagues waiting to speak with you. Penny, would you mind escorting Dr. Cooper?"

His smile was so wide that Penny wondered just how much grant money the government dumped into his lap to provide Sheldon with these opportunities, not that she cared so long as Sheldon was well taken care of.

Sheldon wished he could disappear. He hated public speaking and more so, he hated being gawked at. It was embarrassing. He'd put up with it all his younger life and he never expected it here at CalTech.

As they walked down the hall following Dr. Gablehauser, she leaned up and kissed his cheek. "Oh, Shel, I'm so proud of you. Tenure and a full professorship and time to do your research. I bet you'll win the Nobel Prize before you're 32. The youngest man ever!"

They entered the room (actually a small auditorium seating about 100 people in stadium-type seats). Dr. Gablehauser motioned Penny to lead Sheldon up to the podium. "Careful, Shel. There are 4 steps."

Dr. Gablehauser tapped the microphone and welcomed the faculty to the impromptu lecture. "We will have a question and answer period but first I have a presentation to make." He opened up a blue jewelers case and asked Sheldon to lean forward. He placed a red, white and blue ribbon around his neck. From it dangled the Enrico Fermi Award for Research.

"It is my great pleasure to award Dr. Sheldon Cooper with the Fermi Award for Research in Physics. The awards committee voted to award the medal immediately upon learning of the development of the CMCV. Dr. Cooper, our congratulations!"

The applause was loud and sustained with the occasional whistle from the younger instructors or grad students. Sheldon was blushing but only Penny could tell. She was so proud of him.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I promise to keep my pants on," there was genuine laughter from those who knew about his impromptu streaking experience, "but this award is not just mine. I cannot accept it."


	8. Chapter 8

This is longer than I normally write things but the groundwork took longer than I thought. There's a well-marked naughty section for people like Jislane who can't seem to get enough. I'll be gone for a few days. Don't forget about me.

* * *

><p>Chapter 8<p>

"Dr. Leonard Hofstadter risked his life almost daily while we were trying and failing to perfect the containment vessel. The CMCV is correctly called the Cooper-Hofstadter Magnetic Containment Vessel or CHMCV. Dr. Hofstadter is currently on sabbatical and working with government scientists to develop the vessel for both military and civilian use. Therefore, I cannot accept the Fermi Medal for myself. Thank you for your understanding."

It was quiet in the lecture hall as Sheldon took the medal from around his neck and handed it in the general direction of a shocked Dr. Gablehauser. He gestured to where he thought Penny was standing and held out his hand and they left the lecture hall.

"Sheldon, I was so damned proud of you but then you made that speech and I'm even prouder. That was so …noble of you, Shel. Leonard would never have done such a thing. But I know he'll be proud of you for sharing your achievement."

"Penny, to have done anything else would have been dishonest."

"Let's go home, Sweet Pea. I'll cook us a nice dinner and then we can talk about our future." There. She laid all her cards on the table. She was all in.

* * *

><p>Sheldon changed clothes after Penny helped him with the cuff links and then dug out his old keyboard and walked out and sat in his spot on the couch. He turned it on and waited a few minutes before beginning to play. He wasn't hooked up to the surround-sound so it was a small sound and he grunted and ran a wire from the unit to the keyboard.<p>

Penny had changed into shorts and a tank top and was starting to make Mac 'n Cheez but turned around when he started to play. She recognized the melody from somewhere but she was more surprised to hear it coming from a keyboard played by her wack-a-doodle. He just kept unfolding like a flower. She sat at the kitchen table, dinner forgotten, and listened as the clear and resonant melody filled the apartment.

He played beautifully and she couldn't resist the impulse and sat down next to him. She stifled a gasp when she realized he'd taken off his eye patches. The corner of his right eyelid was puckered from the acid. The normally cobalt blue of his iris was shot through with milky strands that she realized were 'scar tissue'. His eye resembled pictures of Earth taken from a satellite except the clouds weren't ever going to blow away.

"Whatcha playing, Sweet Pea?" She hoped he hadn't heard her reaction to his eyes with his damned Vulcan hearing.

"Debussy, Claire de Lune. It's one of my favorites." He had others but this one seemed to match his mood and company.

"You play beautifully, Shel. I didn't know you could play."

"I learned when I was 5. I liked the regimentation of the notes and chords, the mathematical order of some of the classical pieces. It appeals to my need for order in my life, Penny. And it reminds me…of you, sometimes."

"Me?" She didn't know what to make of that comment.

"Yes, Penny, you. The way the melody flows effortlessly from theme to theme. It reminds me of how effortlessly you live life, the ease with which you handle situations that would break lesser people."

"Sheldon, that's the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me." Her heart skipped a beat when she saw the look on his face. So gentle and so wistful.

"So if Claire de Lune is my theme song, what's yours?"

He flipped a couple of switches and then cracked his knuckles, drawing a chuckle out of Penny. He started playing and Penny was startled by the sound of an organ instead of a piano.

The music was heavy and light at the same time with passages sounding dark and others sounding light and airy. It reminded her of the music from the old monster movies of the 50s like the original House of Wax. But then it changed and became driven and then, she had no other word for it…triumphant.

"Wow, that was unexpected but I really liked it. I like the part at the end where it sounds like the composer was overcoming all obstacles and finally getting what he deserved."

"Very astute, Penny. That was J.S. Bach's Tocatta and Fugue in D Minor."

Just then Sheldon's stomach growled and he blushed. "Let's feed the beast, Shel, and then I think I'd like to take a walk after dinner."

Sheldon had been waiting for it. Penny had been dedicated and loyal and he'd been needy and clinging and now she was getting cabin fever. She'd been with him every moment of every day for all this time, never complaining, never doing anything except caring for him, nothing for herself.

She needed a regular day off each week so she could touch base with friends, get a 'mani-pedi' or just go out and have a good time just like she did before she took the job.

He didn't want to think of her 'dating' someone and so he banished the thought from his mind. But it kept creeping back in, destroying his concentration and his ability to 'write formulae' on his mind's white boards.

Penny's thoughts were along much the same lines. _I have to get him out of this morgue he's holed up in. He needs people, a little fun, some sun, okay – a lot of sun – but he just sits around waiting for something to happen, locked in his own mind._

_He needs a 'day off' to just do crazy things. He needs his friends around him. He needs…to get out!_

* * *

><p>Dinner had gone well except for the peas. Peas were definitely off the menu until he could see. And until his hands quit trembling. <em>What's up with that? Is he sick? He gets vertigo but he was sitting down! Oh, God – a brain tumor?<em>

Penny's mind was going a mile a minute when Sheldon's quiet comment stopped her dead in her thought tracks.

"Penny, I've been selfish and uncaring since you've moved into my life as my companion and I apologize. I have forgotten that you have 'a life' and so, every week from now until I either get my sight back or…whatever, I want you to take a full day for yourself. Go out, reconnect with your friends, have fun. All I ask is that you refrain from bringing home any 'overnight guests'. If you need more time, say for a vacation, let me know in sufficient time to get someone to cover for you."

She looked at him in utter shock and confusion. First an apology that was obviously heart-felt and then the offer of a weekly day off…but what stuck in her mind like a thorn was his request that she 'refrain from…overnight guests'.

_Well, so much for going all in. Either he's so fucking dumb or he doesn't return my feelings. _The thought occurred to her that she hadn't 'told' him how she felt.

She reached across the table and took his hand in hers and looked at him, wishing he could see the love she felt for him in her eyes.

"Shel, baby, I'm in lo – " BANG BANG BANG!

"Sheldon Lee Cooper, open this damned door this fucking instant!" They both jumped, startled, and Penny cursed out loud at the damned interruption.

"I swear whoever is on the other side of that damned door is going to wish they'd never been born."

Sheldon almost whispered, "Crap! It's Missy. She doesn't know about my eyes, Penny. None of my family knows. I couldn't bear the presence of so much pity and hovering so I just 'forgot' to tell them."

Penny opened the door and glared at Sheldon's sister. "Perfect fucking timing, Missy! You couldn't have tripped on the stairs or been kidnapped by gypsies…oh, no! You have to – oh, never mind." She'd been whispering loudly, forgetting Sheldon's 'Vulcan' ears.

"Penny! Where is he? I saw the news on CNN. It's all over the news that he turned down an award…and that he's _blind!"_

Sheldon walked over to his sister and Penny was immediately by his side with her arm wrapped around him in support, something Missy didn't miss. Missy stepped up and wrapped her twin brother in a hug and started crying. Sheldon flinched and looked like he was ready to run but Missy had him in too tight a hug.

"Missy, calm down this instant. What do you mean it's on the news? Penny, what does she mean? Missy, you're wrinkling my clothes and probably getting mascara all over my favorite t-shirt!" If Missy was here then his momma wasn't far behind. He started planning an escape – perhaps Mexico or someplace equally remote, like Death Valley – where he could blend in and be forgotten.

"I was in the airport in Dallas getting ready to fly to New York when I saw the news. Shelly, you were giving a speech and then you turned down a medal and some guy named Gausenhooper or something said that you were just upset because you'd recently been blinded in an accident."

'_Crap on a freaking cracker! That damned newshound! It wasn't enough that Shel got him so much grant money. No, he has to turn my baby's noble gesture into a fundraiser!'_

"It's 'Gablehauser' and he's my boss. It's true, Missy. I'm blind but there is hope and besides, I've hired Penny to be my companion so you and Mommy don't need to worry yourselves over it. I'm in good hands and the doctors are hopeful."

Missy looked at Penny who had flinched when he said 'hired…companion'. She mouthed 'Is that true?' to Penny who nodded although Missy could see the sadness surrounding her blonde friend.

Sheldon had a marvelous idea. "Missy, Penny is getting cabin fever and she's been locked up with me for the past month. Why don't the two of you go out bar jumping and catch up?"

"Sheldon, it's 'bar _hopping'," _said Penny dryly. Melissa mouthed _'We can talk without Spock overhearing us' _and Penny agreed_._

"Okay, Shel, you win. I guess I could use a little female companionship."

"Just please remember to refrain – "

"I heard you the first freaking time, Sheldon freaking Cooper. I may not be as freaking smart as you and your freaking friends but I'm not freaking deaf!" She wasn't exactly shouting but she wasn't using her 'inside voice' either and Sheldon winced at her tone.

"Missy, you need to fix your makeup while I get some sexy duds on. You and I are going to tear this town apart! I hope you have a hotel room, girlfriend, because we are going to be hookin' up!"

She'd been staring at Sheldon the entire time she was talking and gauging his response. He looked…bereft for a fleeting moment but then steeled his features and turned on his heel and walked carefully back to his bedroom and quietly closed the door.

Missy looked at Penny and smiled and said, loudly, "I know just the place and the guys there are only interested in one thing, Penny, _Poosay!_

In his bedroom, lying on his back with his pillow around his head to block out any further sounds, Sheldon Cooper, PhD, _Homo Novus,_ felt his heart shiver and then stop. It was broken.

* * *

><p>Penny walked back into the dark apartment a little after midnight. She turned on lights that Sheldon didn't need but she did. It had been fun talking with Missy about Sheldon and she learned some things that made her understand him better and also anger her at how he'd been mistreated by others. Now she felt guilty about teasing him about his 'germaphobia' and how he didn't want to be touched.<p>

She also enjoyed the two Belgian waffles she scarfed down at IHop they'd gone to when they left the apartment. Missy had listened to all that had gone down with her brother and there were tears and laughter during the 3-hour coffee/waffle binge.

Now it was time to put her plan into action. The boy needed shaken up and she'd done that with her loud comments to Missy and her rejoinder – or so she hoped.

It was never her intention to 'hook up' with anyone. It was, however, her intention to make him think – and if he got jealous, even better.

Penny took a quick shower and brushed her teeth and gargled with mouthwash. She had butterflies – no – _California Condors –_ flitting around in her stomach. She brushed through her hair and dabbed perfume in all the right places and then went to his bedroom and opened the door.

* * *

><p><em><strong>[AN: This part is definitely 'M' rated so if you're too young or just plain innocent, stop reading here and wait for the next chapter.]**_

* * *

><p>Sheldon was lying on his back asleep but she noticed the pillow and felt a frisson of regret but quickly resolved to change regret to satisfaction and more.<p>

Penny walked quietly up beside his bed and drew back the covers and knelt down on the mattress beside him waiting for his 'Danger! Danger!' response to being startled in his sleep but nothing happened.

"Sheldon," she whispered in his ear. "Sheldon, wake up, baby, I'm hommmmmme," she sign-songed in his ear, 'and I'm naked and warm and horny and in love with you so wake up…"

That did it. "Danger! Dang – " She cut him off with a soft kiss, sucking his lower lip into her mouth and caressing it with the tip of her tongue. He tried to roll away but she had his arms pinned to his sides. "Hush, Shel. I went to the IHop with Missy and we just talked, mostly about you."

"Penny, you're in my room. No one is allowed in my – " Another kiss shut him up. "Now, I intend to hook up alright, but with _you_, the man I love and the man who loves me."

"Penny, I don't love you…" His voice was so serious, so like the 'old' Sheldon that for a moment her heart stopped and she wondered if she had misread all the signs. She started to get up, to go to her room but his hand grabbed her wrist in a fierce grip and he jerked her back so that she landed on him.

"I don't love you, Penny, I adore you and so much more…"

"Oh, Shel…" It was more than she hoped for, so much more…

"Penny, you're naked!" Even a blind man could tell since his free hand was cupping her butt cheek.

"Yep!" She 'popped' the 'P' like a teenager. "And you're not, so I have my work cut out for me." It took her less than 30 seconds to strip him of his pajamas and then stretch out beside him on her side.

"Sheldon, Missy told me about the girl in Germany…I could never do that to someone I loved." Missy had told her about child-prodigy Sheldon's girlfriend at the University and how she'd used sex to control him and how she'd publicly humiliated him and almost broke him.

'_Penny, if that Kraut bitch ever sets foot in Texas, she's gonna be daid and I'll be in jail but it will be so worth it…She made him into the robot he is today. It's a defense mechanism he uses to keep people from getting too close and hurting him.'_

"I know Penny. You're different. And I trust you."

Their kisses were tentative but nothing like anything she'd experienced before. His soft lips were all over her and she squirmed when he touched her breasts and moaned when his lips wrapped around her nipple.

Penny grabbed the hand that wasn't wrapped around her and put it between her legs. "Feel that wet heat? I'm so turned on by you, Shel. I'll do anything for you but I want to take it slow and savor our first time together."

He ran his fingertips lightly over her mound and then wheezed a giggle. "Penny, you're bald!" His fingers ghosted over her lips, already swollen and moist. She gasped and pulled him into a deep kiss when he slipped a finger between her labia and stroked them.

"I had to have a Hollywood Brazilian for a swimsuit picture. You don't mind, do you, sweetheart?" Most guys didn't but she wasn't sure considering his comment and the German experience.

Sheldon slid slowly down her body, trailing wet kisses across her tummy and smiling when she squirmed. She wrapped her fingers in his hair and tried to pull him up so she could kiss him but he stopped her with 'I have to taste you, Penny. I can't see you but I can feel you and smell you. Now I want to taste you.'

She pulled her knees up toward her chest and gasped when Sheldon ran the flat of his hot tongue along her lips and somehow curled it to spread them. He plunged his tongue deep into her pussy and she almost came from the shock and sensation. Her moan of pleasure made him smile and repeat the assault several times.

"You taste wonderful, Penny. So much better than – well, I love your taste and the smell of your – um, thing."

She giggled and said, "Baby, it's okay to say 'pussy' when we're in bed together. And what you're doing is so WHOA!" Sheldon had slipped a finger into her loosened pussy and run the tip of it around until he found her G-spot and then slipped another and another until his motions were driving her mad with pleasure

"Please…please, Shel…I need your cock in me. Please…" She reached down to pull his face away but he mumbled "No!" and continued driving her towards her orgasm. Penny pinched her nipples and kneaded her breasts in time with his tongue and fingers. She could feel her orgasm building. The tingling feeling of electricity that she swore was coming from his tongue finally made her muscles clench down on his fingers and she threw back her head and screamed out his name.

She didn't know if she'd passed out or fell asleep but she was suddenly aware of a warm washcloth gently wiping down her mons. For someone whose sexual history was so scarred, Sheldon seemed to know exactly what she needed even when she didn't know herself.

"Sheldon." She said his name, more in awe than anything else. "Hmm?" He was busy gently cleaning her up, knowing how sensitive she'd be after such a climax.

"I love you, Shel. No one else has ever…" He cut her off with a curt "I don't want to hear about your past, Penny, just our now and our future, okay?"

She reached down and grabbed him by his cock and tugged until he was lying between her legs. She wrapped her long legs around his waist and kissed him deeply, feeling him tremble.

"Shel, fuck me, Shel, I want you so bad, baby."

"Badly, Penny, I want you so badly. It's an adverb and modifies…"

"Shut up, ya big stud, and make me scream like you did before. God, Shel, no one has even eaten me so good…er, well."

He entered her slowly, knowing she might be sore but as soon as the head of his cock had passed the muscular entrance to her vagina Penny grabbed his ass and pulled him into her.

"Oh, God, Sheldon, I feel so full!" She shifted her pelvis so that the mushroom head of his cock rubbed against her G-spot every time he withdrew it and then slowly entered her again. It was sheer torture for her to keep from screaming for him to fuck her hard but she wanted what he wanted and he wanted it slow.

Sheldon rested his weight on his elbows and forearms and slowly and steadily pumped his cock into Penny. He could have cum at any moment but he wanted this to last for her. She was so unlike Freya. No demands, no pain, just the two of them loving each other.

His thrusts were getting ragged and he knew he was almost there and he wanted Penny to cum with him but she sensed that he was at end of his self control and so she whispered that she was almost there and that she'd never had anyone make love to her before. The others had just fucked her. She clenched her vaginal muscles around him like a fist and she started to cum again.

It was enough and it seemed like every muscle in his body went rigid as he pounded into her and finally spent himself.

"God, Sheldon, we're never leaving this bed. No one's ever…" Penny whispered when she could breathe again.

"Penny, that's just not possible. We would need to use the bathroom, eat, eventually go grocery shopping and…"

"It was a figure of speech, Shel. And speaking of figures of speech, I'm about to suck your eyeballs out through the hole in your cock."

"Penny, that's just a oh…" He couldn't finish a sentence for a while. She had sucked his flaccid length into her mouth and her tongue got busy. Her head was soon bobbing up and down and she squeezed his ball sac while running her tongue around the head of his rigid cock.

She smiled and started twisting her mouth around the head of his cock when his hips bucked up. She took his entire length into her mouth, fighting her gag response and finally engulfing him. She swallowed his entire load and then cleaned him off and cuddled up next to him.

"I love you, baby. Never doubt that for one minute."

He was asleep in seconds and for the first time in years he slept naked and wrapped around a woman who had no agenda other than 'them'.

Next: Leonard returns and the new couple adjust to being together. Some rough spots but I think they'll make it. No one else does.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Penny drove Sheldon down to Los Angeles for an eye appointment. The specialist was one of the world's best and Alex Forrest had called and told them that 'the guy does wonders' and gave them their appointment time and date. Penny was nervous and it showed in her driving. She sped up, slowed down, changed lanes and blew her horn incessantly.

"Penny, please calm yourself. It will do us no good to die in a fiery crash before we even have our appointment. Perhaps…I should drive…" There was just the hint of a smile on his face but it was enough.

Penny stared at him in disbelief and then slammed on her brakes to avoid rear-ending a slow-moving tractor trailer rig. She blew out a breath and then started to laugh. He could always lighten her moods with his dry wit and one-liners. She wondered why she'd never appreciated them before they got together?

"Okay, Sweet Pea, I'm just nervous, okay? I mean, this is a big deal, Shel, and I'm afraid of the results. I want you to be able to see me…naked…"

She could do her own things to lighten the mood. He wheezed out a chuckle and waved his hand in her general direction.

"Penelope, I don't need to see you naked. I've already peeked…how else would I know about 'soup', remember?"

He had an eidetic memory and he never would forget those soft curves, her pink nipples, how her hips formed the most luscious nest for her…thing. He felt himself blushing. He still had problems with verbally addressing her sexual organs using 'slang', something she teased him about unmercifully.

"Your blushing, Shel, and that means you're thinking about me…us…doing the wild thing, right?"

"Not exactly, Penelope, but close. Now, please concentrate so we can arrive on time and without physical damage to our persons. I would be unable to continue if anything were to happen to you."

"That's so sweet. I like it when you call me 'Penelope'. It's so sexy when you whisper it in my ear and then…"

"Penny! Pay attention to your driving. If you're good, I suppose I could make time in my busy schedule to perform coitus and, of course, cunnilingus. I do think your repertoire of sounds when you achieve orgasm is most unusual and I shall endeavor to enable you to add new sounds to it as often as you like."

She ran his comments through her 'Sheldon Translation Device' and laughed. He could be such a darling man but tried so hard to couch it in terms that sounded sterile and mechanical – like everyone else thought he was.

"Okay, sweetie, this is our exit. I've got our directions and we're all set to see this 'Eye Guy' Alex set us up with." She turned off the UCLA Medical Center exit and followed the directions she'd hastily scribbled on the envelope that the electric bill came in.

* * *

><p>UCLA Medical Center<p>

The exam was perfunctory to say the least. After a brief introduction and then the application of eye drops by an assistant, Dr. Wexford examined Sheldon and then scheduled a procedure that would require that he return the following morning. They were going to inject a radioactive dye into his system and map the flow throughout his ophthalmic system and then determine where to proceed, if at all, from there.

"Dr. Wexford, you don't sound very optimistic. What are his chances of recovering his sight?" Penny asked because she felt the doctor was just 'going through the motions' and she didn't want Sheldon to get his hopes up.

"Honestly? Slim to none in the right eye but the left eye shows great promise. The damage done to the right eye is…irreparable, I'm sorry to say. The left eye has corneal scarring and a partially detached retina, probably as a result of the attack."

"And you can fix it, right? You can give him back the sight in at least one eye? You can do that, right?" She was not going to let his one chance at sight slip away.

"Not at this time. The retina issue needs to be addressed when the healing is complete and then we can discuss a corneal transplant if it appears to be a viable option."

"When can you reattach the retina, doctor?" Sheldon spoke for the first time although his hand never left Penny's except for when he sat in a chair and was examined.

"Let's see the results of the dye test before we consider anything else."

* * *

><p>They left the Medical Center and drove back to Pasadena. Neither said much other than perfunctory comments re Penny's driving (snarky) and Sheldon's ambivalence toward the procedure.<p>

"Shel, this thing tomorrow, will it hurt?"

"No. They just inject radioactive dye into my eyes and then map the flows looking for problem areas."

They went to a pizza joint and ate lunch and then Penny asked Sheldon what he wanted to do next. His answer crushed her.

"I want to learn Braille, Penny." The look on his face told Penny more than his words. He was giving up ever being able to see and accepting his fate. She, however, was not so accepting.

"Seeing out of one eye beats the hell out of being totally blind, Dr. Cooper! You can't give up until all options are exhausted. That's what you told Leonard once and it made sense then and it makes sense now."

"Penny – " But she interrupted him. "No. I won't give up until they all say 'no'. Nope. Never give up. Never surrender."

"Galaxy Quest? EEWWWW, Penny, Galaxy Quest?" Sheldon and his friends all viewed Galaxy Quest with disdain. It wasn't even funny.

"Okay then, forget learning Braille. I meant right now, this afternoon. We have the day free and we're in Los Angeles and…"

"You want to go shoe shopping, don't you?" He sighed. He did promise her shoes so shoes she would have.

"Oh, Shel, baby, if I didn't love ya before…"

"And then I want to work on expanding your repertoire of orgasmic vocalizations." He was smirking and she smiled because she liked that idea, too.

The car lurched and Sheldon almost let out a girly scream when Penny made a U-turn across Westwood Blvd and headed for the interstate.

"Penny, what the blue blazes are you doing?" He was hanging on and his stomach was thinking seriously of evacuating his recently devoured pizza.

"We can always do shoes, Shel, but expanding my whatchamacallit is so much more fun."

* * *

><p>That night, curled up in <em>her<em> bed for a change, Penny asked him the question that had nagged at her for a long time.

"Shel, if you hadn't been hurt, would we have ever gotten together? I mean, like this. Boyfriend, girlfriend."

"Probably not. I was too self-centered and focused on my research and you were too busy trying to find someone to fill the void in your life and would have looked in every bar in the city but never across the hall."

They both were ignoring Leonard and what his reaction would be to their being together as a couple. She had seen how he reacted to her hovering over Sheldon in the hospital. She didn't know how Sheldon felt about it.

"Love ya, Shel." She snuggled deeper into his arms and sighed, incredibly happy for the first time in years.

"Good night, Penelope. Tomorrow will be a better day." He smiled and breathed in her scent and willed himself to believe what he said. He had a feeling the doctor was 'hedging' his bets. There was no hope.

* * *

><p>Leonard arrived on the last flight from his 'undisclosed location' around midnight. It would take at least a month for the contractor to fabricate the containment vessel for testing in flight and he'd been given leave and told to 'relax and recharge'. Leonard's project was critical and he reveled in his new prestige.<p>

He still had his old apartment key but not his 'new' apartment key. He unlocked the door of his old apartment and walked in, smiling. It was home, despite the government's 'move'.

He set down his bags and decided, against all logic, to wake Penny and talk about his feelings for her and how he wanted to give their relationship another try. He'd changed, he knew he had, and he felt that Penny owed it to herself to get to know the 'new' Leonard.

Leonard tiptoed past Sheldon's bedroom door and then boldly opened Penny's. He had this scene in his mind where he'd slip in beside her and wake her with a kiss and then they'd talk and she'd be his again.

"Danger, Danger!" Sheldon awoke and drew Penny's sleeping form protectively to him.

"What the FUCK? Sheldon? Penny? What the hell is going on here?"

Penny woke when she heard Sheldon's warning cry and thought at first that he'd had the nightmare again but then her bleary eyes focused on someone standing in the doorway and then the words hit her like a bucket of cold water.

Leonard.

Penny pulled the bedclothes around her naked body while Sheldon merely stood and said, "Leonard, you're in the wrong apartment. Please leave. Penny and I have an important appointment in the morning and it's important that we both get our REM quotas."

"You're – you're naked! Jesus, what's going on here? You and Penny? Ridiculous!" He ran his fingers through his hair and squinted in the meager light provided by the bathroom. "Penny, I thought – "

"Leonard, get out of my bedroom. Get out of our apartment. Get out of town before I kick your ass all the way back to Utah. You 'thought'? You didn't think at all. I'm with Sheldon now. We love each other and we have a future together."

Leonard lost his temper and memories of all the times in his past he'd been bullied, tormented, lost the girl to some jock, came rushing back and he doubled up his fist and punched Sheldon full in the face. It wasn't a wimpy punch but a punch fueled by rage and humiliation.

Sheldon never saw it coming. He couldn't see it coming. He felt the blow and then he was knocked backwards and lost consciousness.

"Shel! Jesus Christ, Leonard, you hit a blind man?" She lost it then and attacked him with fists and nails and if she could have gotten to his throat, she'd have ripped it out with her teeth.

* * *

><p>Sheldon was dressed and sitting in his spot holding a bag of ice wrapped in a towel against his swollen face. Leonard was out in the hallway trying to justify his actions to the police officers that had responded to a neighbor's 911 call that someone was 'beating a blind man'.<p>

"Ma'am, are you sure you don't want to press charges? It's pretty clear that he assaulted Dr. Cooper and that you did what you could to defend yourself. I still think the doc needs to go to the ER and get checked out."

"No, no, he – was Sheldon's best friend and no, no charges. Just keep him away from us. This whole thing is a damned nightmare."

The cop just shook his head and then left the apartment. He looked at Leonard, bleeding from his nose and his split lip, with disgust and told him to 'get your shit out of their apartment and get a hotel room. Don't come back here or I'll book you for stalking. You hit a blind man, you little turd, just because your ex – just get out of my sight. Be glad she listened to the doc and didn't go all Nebraska on your doofus ass."

* * *

><p>Penny sat down beside Sheldon and ran the tips of her fingers down over his black and blue cheek. "Poor baby. Let's get you back to bed and let Penelope take care of you. I'll sign 'Soft Kitty' to you, Shel, and you can catnap in the car. I'm sorry Leonard can't understand that I love <em>you <em> but it's his problem, not ours."

A/N: Haven't seen the last of Leonard, unfortunately. You might consider hitting the 'review' button and let me know whether or not I'm wasting my time with this story.


	10. Chapter 10

thank you all for your comments. I will finish this.

Rep

* * *

><p>Chapter 10<p>

**Driving to Los Angeles**

I'm sorry Leonard can't understand that I love _you _ but it's _his_ problem, not ours."

Sheldon catnapped as best he could while subconsciously awaiting a fiery death on the freeway. His face throbbed and he wondered if the punch Leonard hit him with could in any way affect the test results.

"Penny, Leonard is going to be living across the hall from us for a month, if not more. He was my friend once, even if he did falsify my North Pole Expedition data. We need to be civil to him but I'd really prefer that you weren't alone with him. I worry about what might happen."

"Oh, Shel, that's so sweet but I think I can handle Leonard."

"I was thinking about how ugly things might get if you went all 'Nebraska' on him and then there'd be the trial and the sentencing and I'm not big on conjugal visits to some filthy prison trailer that probably has cooties, Penny, no matter how much I love you. So, please, don't hurt him."

She laughed all the way to Los Angeles. Her boyfriend could take away all her worries and pain with just a few simple words. She felt so blessed to have him in her life now.

* * *

><p>Penny couldn't watch them inject the dye into his eye. It was just too freaky even though Sheldon kept up a running commentary on the history of 'Nuclear Medicine' and how interesting the entire process was. Nope. She went out into the small lobby and sat down and found an 'US' magazine and read it, not seeing the words, just looking at it.<p>

"Penny, Dr. Wexford wants you to come in. He has a few things to cover and then Dr. Cooper is all yours. He's so smart it's scary, isn't it? He and Dr. Wexford got into an interesting discussion regarding light wave interpolation and I just felt so dumb…"

"Yeah, he can do that without meaning to. He 'dumbs' things down for me sometimes and I help him ease through the social graces without getting too banged up."

"Dr. Cooper told us what happened last night. I can't believe anyone would hit a blind man over a non-existent relationship. He said you beat the crap outta the guy and I'm so proud that his woman stood up to that little creep."

Dr. Wexford was brief and to the point. The right eye was never going to improve and the left eye showed potential but he still wanted to wait to see if the retina resolved itself without surgery. "Surgery further scars the tissues we need to have healthy so we'll wait."

* * *

><p>The drive back to Pasadena was quiet until Sheldon made his 'authoritative pronouncement'. "Penny, we have the entire summer to do anything we please. I have money and you have nothing pressing, so I suggest – a road trip."<p>

"Sheldon! A road trip? In _this_ car? Where? And why now?" Penny wasn't against the idea. She just wanted to know what Sheldon's idea of a road trip was.

"I'll buy you a new car, something in keeping with your image. We'll talk about where in the days to come. I'll make a list and you make a list and then we'll plot them on a map and make our schedule and…"

"Wait a minute. I'm not interested in seeing the biggest ball of belly button lint or anything weird like that. I'll make a list and keep it simple. We'll discuss this like adults, Shel. And we do it at the kitchen table because you know I can't say 'no' to you in bed."

"But first, I need Howard to help me with an invention I've been thinking about. It's simple, so simple that I can't believe no one has thought of it before. And I need to learn Braille as soon as possible. I'll need access to the Information Highway, the World Wide Web, the – "

Penny got mad and interrupted him. "So you are giving up! You promised me you wouldn't give up. Learning Braille is giving up, Sheldon. You broke your promise…"

She sniffed a few times and fought back the tears. If Sheldon gave up on seeing, what would he do about _them_ the first time things got rocky? Give up?

"Penny, I need to learn Braille so that I can function in the sighted world until the operation. I need to be able to read journals and papers and I need to be able to do my research. Penny, you're only one person and I doubt when I get cracking, you'll be able to write down my thoughts quickly enough. That's why I need Howard's help."

"Okay. I jumped the gun there, sorry. I thought you'd – "

"Penelope, I told you I wanted to be able to see you naked. I have eidetic imagery but there are so many new things about you that I need to be able to see and remember."

"Okay…but why now, Shel?"

"Leonard's presence, even with a restraining order, cramps my style." His Texas twang twanged loud and clear and she got the message. She laughed and squeezed his hand and made plans for a very intimate evening.

"And besides, Penny, I want us to make new memories of things we can share when we're old and crotchety and your memory begins to fail. Everything up until the incident – I had to share you with others. Now, you're all mine…bwahaha!"

His evil mad scientist laugh freaked her out for a second until she realized he was smiling, quoting a movie, and then she laughed with him.

Everyone always said he was one failed science experiment away from being a mad scientist. They were so wrong.

* * *

><p>They were curled up together in her bed and it was difficult to see where she stopped and he started. The sex had been fantastic and Sheldon had teased her about adding several new items to her 'climax repertoire' and she'd just kissed him and fallen asleep.<p>

And began to dream of her wedding but it wasn't Sheldon she saw waiting for her when she walked down the aisle. The groom was a stranger, someone who looked like her typical 'old Penny' one-night stand guy would have been.

She woke up and nudged Sheldon until he awoke but she muffled his 'Danger! Danger!' with the palm of her hand.

"Sheldon, where do you see us in five years?" He wasn't as alert as he would normally have been and so he missed the subtle nuance of her whispered question.

"Hopefully I'll be a Nobel Laureate and you'll be happily married to a man you love, possibly with a child who looks just like you." In his mind, _he_ was that man but Penny was still in the grips of her dream and so she didn't grasp the subtlety of his response.

She got out of bed and wrapped her robe around her and told Sheldon to get out. "Get out, Sheldon. This isn't what I want out of life. This isn't my dream. Get out of my room. We'll discuss what needs to be done in the morning."

"Penny, I don't understand – " He was confused and still not awake, a tribute to Penny's influence on him. Old Sheldon would have been busy preparing for Armageddon but New Sheldon was still trying to grasp what was happening.

"I said, get out! Now! You're all alike, aren't you? I don't know why I expected you to be any different. Maybe I just should have tried again with Leonard after all."

He found his robe on the chair beside the bed and left her bedroom. He knew it had been only a matter of time until she started questioning her feelings for him and realize that being with a blind man was too much for her to handle. It was Germany all over again, without the humiliation factor. That would probably come later.

Sheldon walked into his room, threw on some clothes and then left the apartment. He had nowhere to go but she had been adamant. _Well, at least this time I'm not naked on the University lawn._

* * *

><p>He walked out onto Los Robles and headed east with no destination in mind. He just wanted to walk and forget about everything. He was running various scenarios through his head while walking. Her comment about staying with Leonard had hurt him.<p>

He walked and walked, running his hand along the side of buildings so he wouldn't wander out into the street, not knowing where he was and not really caring. He turned north onto another wide boulevard and started walking but soon realized he was totally lost. He'd been rehashing their argument instead of keeping track of where he was.

He'd left his cell phone at home so he couldn't call Howard and Raj wasn't due back from India until the following week so he just sat down on the steps of a store and waited for daybreak. He could ask a passerby about his location and then walk home.

* * *

><p>After a good two-hour cry, Penny went into the bathroom to clean up. She'd acted like an idiot and Sheldon had gone back to his room and was probably asleep.<p>

_I need to wake him up and apologize and beg his forgiveness. I wasn't thinking straight. He doesn't think he'll get his sight back and he thinks I'll leave him for some guy, the big house with the white picket fence and the minivan and all the normal stuff._

_I don't want 'normal'. I want Sheldon. I'll never be bored, that's for sure._

She went to his room and knocked lightly and then went in. She flipped on the light but the bed hadn't been slept in but his robe was casually thrown across it, something so unlike Sheldon.

_He must really be upset with me. _She walked out into the living room and turned on a lamp but he wasn't on the couch. His cell phone and keys were right where he always left them…so where the hell was he?

"Sheldon? Sheldon? Honey, I'm sorry. Where are you? Sheldon?" Each time she called his name a little louder until she was practically yelling. _I was upset. I told him to get out. I meant 'out of my bedroom' not the damned apartment. Leonard! Maybe he went over to Leonard's._

Part of her hoped her boyfriend was mending fences with his best friend but the larger part hoped he stayed away from Leonard. Life with Sheldon was complicated enough without his best friend hanging around the apartment, trying to drive a wedge between the new couple while trying to get her back between the sheets.

Unbidden, a fragment of Sheldon's rambling comment leaped to the forefront of her consciousness_. I want us to make new memories of things we can share when we're old and crotchety and your mind begins to fail._

She had her answer before she'd even asked the question. _Shit-shit-shit! I'm so damned stupid sometimes. He __**told**__ me what I wanted to know before I even asked but I didn't catch it._

* * *

><p>It began to rain and so Sheldon walked up the street until he came to a storefront with either and awning or an overhang and sat down with his back against the wall. At least he was out of the rain. He pulled the collar of his shirt up around his neck, tucked his chin against his chest and fell asleep.<p>

He'd wandered into a 'bad' section of town without realizing it and police presence had been ramped up because of a series of muggings and beatings. A blind Sheldon huddled up out of the rain made such a tempting target.

"Hey, over there, under the marquee of the old movie theater…some homeless guy." The driver slowed the car and then brought it to a stop at the curb. They both got out and approached the sleeping Sheldon warily.

"I know this guy. He's the blind guy from the domestic disturbance last night on Los Robles. Hey, Doc, wake up. What are you doing here?"

* * *

><p>Penny was almost to the point of waking Leonard and sending his ungrateful ass out to look for Sheldon. She didn't want to leave the apartment in case he came back or called her and needed picked up.<p>

She had gotten dressed and had a hand on the door knob when someone on the other side pounded on it and she yelped in surprise. She looked through the peep hole that Sheldon had insisted on installing years before and saw a cop's face staring back at her.

She threw open the door and brushed past the cop, who wisely stepped out of the way, and lunged for Sheldon, nearly knocking him off his feet.

The officers smiled at one another until Leonard opened his apartment door and squinted through his thick glasses to take in the tableau before him. Penny was crying and kissing Sheldon while the two cops looked on like proud parents – until one noticed Leonard and nudged his partner.

"Dr. Hofstadter, get your myopic ass back into your hole. You're in violation of a restraining order."

Leonard's mouth started flapping, making useless sounds, and then the officers herded Penny and Sheldon into their apartment, shot Leonard a glare and then returned to their patrol car.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

* * *

><p>Sheldon versus the DMV<p>

Things had finally calmed down for the couple. Penny had her assurances that Sheldon was in it for the long haul and Sheldon, well, Sheldon had Penny and was becoming less of an 'mandroid' and more of a person, albeit very slowly.

Case in point: Sheldon decided that it was ridiculous for Penny to have to walk a hundred yards from the parking lot to the restaurant in the pouring rain, after dropping him off in front. Although he couldn't see her, he knew she was miserable and felt clammy and uncomfortable and so he decided to get a _temporary _handicapped medallion for her car.

He had Penny drop him off at the front door of the store front office after giving him explicit instructions to 'wait for me, Shel. The DMV is a creepy place. Think of the Joker's Lair but with State Employees instead of 'minions'. I'll find a place to park and meet you inside. Don't talk to _any_body, okay?"

Impatient, he felt his way toward the door and opened it. He made his way forward to a counter and rapped his knuckles loudly against it to summon an employee.

A large woman dressed in a floral circus tent stuffed the last of her third breakfast burrito into her face and walked up to the counter. She'd just finished her break and needed a cigarette.

"You have to get in line, sir. There are rules here and rules are to be followed here just like out on the highway. Get in line."

"I'm not here to get a driver's license. I'm here to get a handicapped medallion. I'm temporarily blind and need a handicapped medallion." He shoved a folder of medical records in the general direction of the clerk's voice and waited.

"If you're blind, you shouldn't be driving. And if you shouldn't be driving then you shouldn't be parking either and therefore, you have no need for a handicapped medallion. Next," she called out over Sheldon's shoulder. She really needed that cigarette.

"Excuse me but I see care-givers parking in handicapped areas and then helping their charges out of a vehicle every day. I don't see – "

"I thought you said you were blind and if you're blind, how can you 'see' care-givers doing anything? Are you _sure _you're blind? Next," she said, impatient to go on another break. She'd been on her feet for 10 minutes dealing with this citizen and was in need of a break. And a cigarette.

"I am blind but I haven't always been blind just as you haven't always been a rude, overpaid, under-worked and probably uneducated drone living off the misery of others who are compelled by the State to pay for the privilege of driving on highways they themselves paid for through various taxes and fees. Or in my case, wishing to be allowed to park in a handicapped parking space in what will most probably always be privately owned parking lots."

By now, several others in line were openly listening and many were in agreement with the blind preying mantis man who had dared to challenge the Beast in its own Belly. There were angry and ugly mutterings from those who had been standing in line wishing they had the guts to do what the 'blind guy' was doing.

"Say _what?_ Look here, Stringbean, it's time for my break and I don't get paid enough for this crap. You don't need a handicapped parking medallion because you're blind and shouldn't be driving, let alone parking. Next," she yelled at a young woman who flinched, hoping she hadn't offended the DMV clerk in some unknown way. She'd been in line an hour after being sent to the back of the line because she hadn't properly filled out a form. She'd been here since 8am and it was almost noon.

"Your use of circular logic may work on those unable to summon the mental acuity to unravel it but I am not one of them." He threw down his gauntlet to the delight and amazement of his fellow citizens, and issued his challenge in its deadliest form when dealing with a State employee. "I want to see your supervisor."

"I thought you said you were blind? Blind people can't 'see' anything, especially not my supervisor."

"Temporarily, although God may grant me sight long before you will grant me a handicapped parking medallion for my care-giver's car. I want to see your supervisor and then maybe her manager. It's early in the day. Perhaps I'll even be able to summon a lawyer from the Americans with Disabilities Association and file a complaint against the blatant discrimination practiced at the DMV."

Penny walked into the DMV office and looked around for Sheldon. There was an ambulance out front and she saw a crowd of gawkers standing around some poor woman who was shrieking about preying mantises and cigarettes as the two paramedics tried to stuff her into a straight jacket.

Penny saw Sheldon standing aloof from the crowd, a handicap parking medallion in his hand and several customers of the DMV taking their pictures together with him using camera phones. She didn't like the looks on some of the younger women's faces as they looked at her beloved whackadoodle.

She kissed him soundly and apologized for keeping him waiting. "Sorry. I had to walk all the way across the lot and then I stepped in a pot hole and broke the heel of my shoe and…"

"I got the medallion, Penny, with very little trouble at all. I feel guilty now for your mishap since I was the one who insisted on getting the medallion today. Let's go buy you a new pair of shoes."

"Oh, Shel, you really know how to make a girl feel special!" She glared at one Latina girl who was looking at her man friend with a look she recognized from her own reflection some nights – horny – and led him out of the DMV office.

"What happened to that poor woman in that horrid floral print dress, baby? She looked like she'd seen one of the things from Alien and barely got away."

Sheldon just laughed. If he'd known how easily the Minions of the DMV could be overcome, he'd have been driving for years and probably have his own motor vehicle by now. And that reminded him…

"Penelope, that vehicle of yours needs replaced. After shoes, I sense a need to purchase a new car for you, well, us. Do you have any specific requirements in mind? I was thinking along the lines of an Audi or perhaps a BMW. I have queried Howard and he tells me that the highest rated for safety and the lowest for repair costs rank those two consistently in the top 5."

Penny's face got red and she felt a surge of heat in her loins. Her wonderful whackadoodle was thinking along the lines of two of the hottest cars she'd ever laid eyes on.

Her mind flew free as she imagined them driving through the ratty trailer parks most of her old friends from Omaha lived in, 'Penny from Pasadena and her Nobel Prize winning lover' would definitely be gawked at. And then when they cruised the Dew Drop Inn for drinks, all those people who'd mocked or mauled her would finally be put in their places.

"Penny, Penny? Are you listening? Would you prefer the Audi or the BMW? After all, it will be yours to drive even after I regain my sight. You might as well be happy with your new car. Perhaps we can arrange for the Check Engine Light to be always on, just for old times' sake?"

"Sarcasm, Shel?" She giggled. He was making such progress. He wasn't a Cylon, or a Terminator skin-job, or a Borg. Nope, he was Sheldor the Conqueror and she loved him very much.

"Drat! You saw right through my clever – " She stopped him with a deep kiss, right there in the DMV parking lot in broad daylight. When he deepened the kiss further, she raised her thigh high on his and grabbed his ass and pulled him closer and then began to grind her crotch against his bulge.

"P-Penny, we're out in public and we have a schedule to keep. Y-you need shoes and then we need a c-car and…"

She whispered in his ear, her hot breath exciting him more than usual since they were in public, "Ever had a blowjob in a car surrounded by morning shoppers, Shel? Mmm, the thought of going down on my man in public makes me hot and horny…c'mon."

"P-Penny – stop this. I can hardly walk around in public sporting an erection. There are children about! Would you want our children exposed to such actions at tender ages?"

That stopped her in her tracks. She leaped away from him and quickly turned around in a circle. There were only the occasional shoppers pushing their grocery carts but he had made a valid point.

"Sorry, honey, sorry. I get carried away when I get horny. How about we just hobble our way to the car and head home? The dealership will still be there tomorrow or the next day and I already have shoes for days, baby."

"No, Penny. A promise is a promise. Shoes, then a car, then home and coitus and cunniligus, although the latter two are in optional order and will probably be interspersed with fellatio if I'm not mistaken."

"You're right as usual, Sheldon. But tomorrow, let's check out the Audi TT coupe. It's got nice lines, ample leg room as well as internal navigation and…"

Sheldon just let her go on. He'd already decided on the Audi TT Coupe. He'd once found a brochure and Penny had drawn hearts all around that model and scrawled 'Some Day!' in the margin. Well, tomorrow was "Penny's Some Day".

Next: Sheldon versus the Slutty Sales Lady


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Pasadena Audi

Giselle Richardson was the dealership's top salesperson because she sold cars - any way she could. Working at a high-end dealership carried with it certain perks so long as the numbers were consistently there and for Giselle, they certainly were. So when Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, PhD and theoretical physicist at CalTech got out of a cab in front of the dealership alone, she rushed to the front door to greet him.

Sheldon, for all his usual foibles, had at least sense enough to dress for the occasion. He'd worn the suit that Penny had bought him, the French-cuffed shirt and of course the studded cufflinks that Penny had splurged on. His silk tie was carefully knotted and his shoes were shined.

He reeked 'wealth and status' and Giselle quickly scanned his left hand for any signs of ownership as she took the proffered business card from him. None. Good.

She smiled, and licked her lips at the tall sales prospect. His reflective aviator sunglasses gave him a mysterious air and she felt almost intimidated by his unwavering stare.

So, Dr. Cooper, Theoretical Physicist. Just what is it you do?" She knew men loved to talk about their work. It empowered them, made them think they were 'big shit' as they gazed down at her ample bosoms prominently displayed in her tailored Vera Wang business suit.

Sheldon wished that Penny would hurry up. She'd forgotten to bring her 'proof of insurance' card with her and had to return to their apartment to get it out of the glove box of her car. He had insisted that they take a cab so that Penny could immediately drive her new Audi TT Coupe home. It would make her happy and that's what this was all about.

"I posit the glue of the universe, the very thing that enables you and I to be here today. Now, I wish to purchase a gunmetal gray Audi TT Coupe fully complemented with all options. The sale will be in cash so please don't belabor yourself with trying to get me to finance through an institution with which you have a financial interest if the sale is financed through them."

She blinked and reassessed her customer. Cash sale? He probably didn't have enough for a decent down payment. Oh well, she was bored and he was cute, in an insect-like way, so she might as well enjoy her day.

"I…see. Well, do you see anything else you might like? We have a few less expensive models here that would perhaps meet your needs for status…"

"I may be blind, but unlike you, apparently, I'm not deaf, whatever your name is. I want an Audi TT Coupe in gunmetal gray, and I want to be able to drive it off the lot today. Run along, now, and make it happen."

Giselle was not used to men ignoring her and had totally missed the 'blind' portion of Sheldon's comments. "Dr.", she glanced at the business card again, surprised that she'd forgotten his name, "ah, Cooper, are you certain you can write a check for that amount? With tax, title, license and whatnots, it'll be more than $50,000.00 – a princely sum." This guy had knocked her off her stride.

"I would have preferred the 10-cylinder R8 but Penny has her heart set on the TT Coupe and it's not all that expensive in comparison."

Giselle blinked and suddenly wondered just how much a theoretical physicist made in a year. She stepped closer to Sheldon and pressed her ample bosom against his forearm and asked him what additional features he had envisioned. The double entendre fell on deaf ears.

"Everything you could possibly imagine on a car. I want it as fully complemented as possible and I expect to drive it off the lot today. Now, if you're done pressing your breasts against my arm, may I suggest you start the process. She will be along any minute and I'd like it to be a surprise. Run along now. Have your finance man contact my bank if you have doubts about my ability to pay."

Sheldon stared out at the showroom, not seeing the sudden look of surprise and envy sweep across Giselle's face. She suddenly wanted nothing more in life than to have this man in her bed. Never before had she been 'dismissed' as inconsequential by any man and it was a disturbing first.

"Dr. Cooper, what is your relationship with this 'Penny' you mention? She is a lucky girl to have a husband like you who pampers her."

"Oh, we're not married. She's my companion and it's part of our arrangement that I buy her a car and I know that this is the car she wants."

Giselle stuttered, shocked that this man blatantly referred to this Penny person as his 'companion' and that they had an 'arrangement'.

"You know", she practically purred in Sheldon's ear, "I would love to meet a man like you, someone who knew how to treat a lady, someone who didn't require the normal social niceties in order to live happily. I could make such a man very, very happy, Dr. Cooper. I could make _you_ very happy. If you'd like, we could go for a test drive up to the park, away from the congestion, and you could see how happy you could be."

Poor Sheldon had missed the inference of 'test drive', but Penny hadn't. She had slipped in unnoticed and just watched as the saleswhore plied her wiles against her naive and innocent lover.

Penny wore the 'uniform' she'd adopted when accompanying Sheldon out in public other than on dates – pinstriped fitted pants, a white tuxedo blouse and a blazer. The leather boots he'd bought her after the DMV incident had 4-inch heels and with her hair piled casually on top of her head, she appeared quite striking and intimidating.

"You fucking skank! Get those claws off my man or I'll rip your dyed hair out of your head a clump at a time!"

She pressed a kiss onto Sheldon's cheek and slipped her arm through his, allowing her other hand to rest on his chest over his heart. In a much quieter tone, she asked Sheldon, "Did she touch you, baby? I have sterile alcohol wipes in my purse. You can't be sure where her hands have been." The look she shot Giselle said 'I _know_ where they've been, whore!'

"Penny, I didn't see you come in." He smiled in the general direction of her voice. He'd visibly relaxed when she stepped up and wrapped herself around him.

"Sheldor honey, you haven't seen a damned thing in almost two months. You need to watch your word selection, sweetie. You confuse people who don't know you're blind."

"He's – blind? He's blind and he wants a car?" Her voice got really shrill when she thought Sheldon was putting her on at her expense. She bowed up like a cat and got ready to kick the asshole's butt but she never got the chance.

"I'm from a small farm town outside of Omaha and I've kicked more ass than you've kissed so back off my guy. We're here to buy a car – not be sexually harassed! Where's the damned sales manager? Where's the owner?"

Giselle couldn't answer. Penny's hand had closed on her throat the second she'd moved aggressively toward Sheldon. She made gurgling sounds and then fell limp and panting to the floor.

"Dr. Cooper expressed an interest in purchasing a fucking Audi fucking TT fucking Coupe and I don't like it when someone disappoints my man so where the FUCK is the damned sales manager?"

* * *

><p>Two hours later, Penny purred into Sheldon's ear that she loved him very much and then led him over to their new car – a 2013 Audi TT Coupe with every option imaginable, all at a significantly reduced price. She made sure he had his seatbelt on and then walked up to Giselle who was sporting purple fingerprints on her neck and stopped, toe to toe with her, and then hawked a loogie right into her face.<p>

"Don't even think for one moment of filing a complaint, Bitch, because I've already got a TRO on someone else who touched him." Smiling, she blew a kiss to the general manager and then got into her new car and peeled out, tore down Pasadena Boulevard and headed for the Pacific Coast Highway.

Sheldon had drilled her mercilessly on each function of the sleek vehicle, even going so far as asking her to stop the car and make sure she could operate the jack and change a tire. She'd drawn the line at that but promised him that he could 'drill' her relentlessly once they got in bed. He was quiet for the rest of the drive.

She turned on the radio and sang along with some of the songs she knew. Sheldon had heard her sing before but hadn't really appreciated it until now. Her low sultry voice seemed to vibrate throughout his body. Maybe it was because he loved her. He didn't know or care. She had a beautiful voice and could listen to her sing a parts list for an old Tandy TRS-80 color computer and appreciate it.

Penny pulled into a little B&B just outside of Santa Barbara and told Sheldon to sit tight and then she went in and got them a room for the weekend. They were both looking forward to getting out of their semi-formal clothes and into something much more comfortable –each other.

* * *

><p><em><strong>AN: I can't resist a little s-e-x. Definitely M.**_

The bed vibrated. Put a quarter in it and the 'Magic Fingers' did their thing. Penny laughed when a naked Sheldon rummaged through his pockets for a quarter but then shrieked in surprise when the mattress started shaking like a 7.0 on the Richter scale.

"Sheldon, turn it off. It's – " He felt his way across the bouncing mattress until he found soft flesh – her thigh – and began kissing his way up it until he came to her center and suddenly she wasn't laughing anymore.

He realized that if he rested his chin on one of the vibrating coils, his tongue vibrated and made her moan and make gentle fists in his hair. He loved making her moan and whimper because he was the reason.

"Oh, shit, Shel, I'm coming…" Penny ground her pussy against his face, trying to get as much of his mouth into play as possible. Her orgasm struck and she shivered in pleasure. It was possibly the most intense 10 minutes of her young life.

"Okay, baby, find another quarter. It's your turn." She planned on driving him crazy but he had other plans for her. He dragged her up until she was straddling him and he lifted her up by her hips and lowered her onto his cock. Penny leaned over and dropped the quarter into slot and felt his cock begin to vibrate deep within her.

"Shel – Jesus, baby, what the – " Sheldon was almost speechless as well. Being thin, his bones met the coils through the thin mattress and conducted the vibrations more easily throughout his body and hers. He started to whimper when she clenched the muscles of her vagina and rocked against him, not needing to rise up more than an inch or two to drive him to the edge.

And hold him there.

"P-Penny, please…Penny…" Penny reveled in the look on his face, the way his hands were everywhere she needed them to be, the strangled sounds he made. She loved him more than she thought possible and it was that thought that made her raise up on his cock, almost to the tip, clench her muscles almost painfully, and then slide down his length, making a delicious moaning sound that rose from low in her throat before reaching a crescendo as her orgasm rocked her world.

She started to cum almost as soon as she clenched her pussy muscles and she squeezed his cock tightly, letting her hot moistness tip him into his own orgasm. She murmured his name over and over and then collapsed against his chest.

"Penny, we have _got_ to get one of these for the apartment," he wheezed. She pressed kisses into his pale chest and sighed loudly. "I love you, Dr. Cooper. No one else could ever make me feel like you do. Please don't ever leave me, Shel. I don't think I could survive without you in my life."

"Shel?" She raised her head up and smiled softly. Poor baby. Asleep and with that precious smile on his face. She grinned and then rolled off him and pulled the blankets over them and wiggled closer to him. She put that smile on his face. She fell asleep dreaming of minivans and big houses with white picket fences and 2 little Sheldons making a nuclear reactor in the garage while their father looked on with approval.

Next: Meeting Penny's Family or How to Ruin a Relationship in 30 Minutes or Less


	13. Chapter 13

A little longer than I normally write. Going to be busy for the next few days. Enjoy and pls don't forget me.

REP

* * *

><p>Chapter 13<p>

Outside Omaha, Nebraska  
>Stopped along side County Road 311<p>

"Shel, we don't have to do this. I know you think we do but we don't. My daddy still thinks Leonard is the guy for me and he thinks you're…strange. Let's just move on down our list and head for Galveston. We can find a nice B&B out on San Padre Island or someplace like it and just chill. I bought a new bikini, Shel…"

"Are you ashamed of me, Penny? Is that why you're reluctant to visit the home of your birth? I know it's been a while since you've even spoken with your sister or mother. In fact, your lack of communication seems to have begun, coincidentally, with you and I becoming…whatever we are." The last part what muttered almost under his breath but it was a small car and for once, Penny didn't have the Bose sound system cranked up.

Penny felt a moment of shame. She wasn't ashamed of him…she was ashamed of her family. She knew her guy would be subjected to a rigorous cross-examination just as Leonard had been, but Leonard had been docile, wanting to please and be accepted. Sheldon could give a shit less about acceptance by her family.

She looked at him, the way he was dressed in jeans and a blue chambray work shirt and tennis shoes. They'd slept in after getting in late from a movie and then making love half the night and she hadn't shaved him and she liked the rough look of him. He needed a haircut but she liked his hair longer than he did so he put it off…for her.

"No! I'm not ashamed of you, baby. I'm ashamed of where I grew up, my dumbass family and some of my really dumbass old friends. They're all going to be hovering around, nitpicking. They did it with Leonard and they'll try to do it with you. And they'll regale you with tales of my 'exploits' from back in the day."

"Well, we'll just have to hold hands and think of other things…like last night for example, or how nice this car is, or how neat it will be if I can find one of those massaging mattresses. We'll be okay. You'll see."

"Um, Shel, I never told them you were blind. I really had hoped you'd be all fixed up before we met up with them."

"Well, look at the bright side, Penny. I won't have to look at them and disguise my feelings…" He wheezed a chuckle. He'd come from poorer roots than Penny. Her family owned their farm. Sheldon's father had tenant farmed until he died. Only his Meemaw owned her own spread.

"Sheldon, if you start feeling uncomfortable, just tell me and we'll get the hell outta Dodge. We don't need their approval, do we?"

"Nope." But she needed it and so Sheldon simply buried his fear and apprehension and nodded. "Let's go, Penny. It's dark already." It was a private joke between them. "Shel, it's always dark according to you."

* * *

><p>Penny turned off the county road onto a dirt road. She expertly navigated around potholes but kept glancing over at her boyfriend wishing they were going to his house instead of hers. The lane to the house was straight as an arrow and lined with poplars to break the wind. On one side was a barbed wire fence that kept the small cattle herd from wandering around. The field on the other side was fallow – a sure sign of money problems.<p>

"Shel, I heard what you muttered under your breath. What do you think we are? I'd say 'lovers in a committed relationship hoping for a miracle and that you get your sight back but ready to handle whatever life throws in our path as long as we're together'."

It was a mouthful and she was worried she'd get it all out before running out of breath.

He reached over and found her hand on the gearshift knob and gave it a squeeze and she smiled because for once she'd given him the right answer without any hesitation. There was no reason to hesitate. It was how she felt.

* * *

><p>"Slugger!" Her dad walked quickly up to her and grabbed her into a tight embrace, spinning her around. Sheldon leaned back against the car, arms across his chest, a subtle smile on his face. "Damn, girl, look at you! Pretty as a picture and driving a new car? I knew you could make something of yourself out there in Tinseltown."<p>

"Daddy, it's good to see you. You've lost weight!" He had but probably because of the booze he drank. She could smell the beer on his breath.

"Daddy, this is Sheldon, my boyfriend. He's a theoretical physicist and is going to win the Nobel Prize someday." Penny was so proud of her boyfriend and Wayne wondered what had happened to the little squint she'd brought home the last time? Leopold? Leonidas? Louis? No…Leonard? He wasn't sure. The little garden gnome hadn't made much of an impression on him.

"Humph, well at least he's taller than that squinty-eyed hobbit you brought home the last time." He turned to Sheldon, a little intimidated by his aloofness. Normally the guys Penny brought home fell all over themselves kissing his ass.

"I'm Wayne and you're the other roommate, the batshit crazy one Leo told us all about. Well, from the way Slugger's hanging on you, I suspect you got over your phobia of touching other people. I guess that's progress of a sort." He held out his hand and waited for Sheldon's. Penny saw the look on his face and quickly nudged Sheldon, whispering, "Shake his hand, baby. Take one step to the left and extend your hand…"

Sheldon knew that a handshake meant a great deal to country people and so he squeezed Wayne's hand in what he hoped would be construed as a 'manly grip'. When the other man squeaked, he knew he'd misjudged his grip.

"Well, at least you don't shake hands like no damned fairy. Shaking Leopold's hand was like holding a dead fish – all wet and clammy-like." He shook his wrist to get feeling back into his fingers.

Penny figured the test was over and so she dragged Sheldon up onto the porch and told him to 'sit, I'm gonna find my momma'. "Ya want a beer, son? I know it's early but we get up early here."

"No thanks. Alcohol and I have a problem with each other." Sheldon tried to be as vague as possible.

"You an alcoholic? Lost your license to drunk driving, huh? Well, no shame in it, son." He was beginning to like this boy, even if he looked like a walking stick. At least he wore normal clothes, not like those layers of sweaters the other one wore. But those sunglasses had to go. He needed to see a man's eyes when he talked to him.

Just then Penny burst through the screen door and grabbed Sheldon's hand and pulled him to his feet. "Let's go, Sheldon. I'm not here two damned minutes and they're starting on me. I told you coming here was a mistake! We can be in Galveston by this time tomorrow, honey."

"No, Penny. We're here for a reason and you haven't spent any time here in how long? No. You sit down and talk with your daddy while I get the bags from the car." He held his hand out for the keys and she saw the slight tremor and knew he was just as nervous as she was.

She leaned over and kissed his cheek to cover a whispered 'down five porch steps, then about eight steps to the passenger door. The round key is the trunk key. Just bring my overnight bag for now. Luv ya, Shel.'

* * *

><p>While Sheldon got their bags, Penny's father started in where her mother had left off but got a big surprise when she told him about her job at CalTech. Her mother walked out with her sister just as Penny got to the part about her new job.<p>

"I'm a teaching assistant at CalTech and I assist Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, Theoretical Physicist and full professor with tenure. I also have benefits and get to go to school tuition-free. It's better than acting and pays way better than waitressing." She was proud of her new job, her new car and especially about her new boyfriend.

"Penny, you didn't even finish a semester at Community College! How can you…"

Penny ignored her sister Darcy's arrival and explained the changes in her life.

"Sheldon arranged it all. He needs assistance because…because someone shot him in the eyes with acid and then he invented this marvelous magnetic containment vessel for the space program and then he won a Physics award and it was all on TV…"

"Acid? He got shot with acid? He's…he's _blind_, Penny?" Her sister ignored all his achievements and homed in on the one thing that set him apart.

"Yeah and he saved me and one of our friends from being shot again and all he had was a damned paintball gun and acid in his eyes but he kept shooting her in the face so she couldn't hit us again and he blinded her with paint and I whacked her upside her haid with a backpack and…" She hadn't breathed for the entire speech and she stopped and took a deep breath and said, "And I love him and he loves me and he might get ta seeing agin after an operation but it's not a fer sure thang."

Sheldon stopped at the porch steps and listened to her. He heard how she'd slipped back into her old speech patterns just as he did when he was excited or angry or uncertain of himself.

"He's _blind?_" Her sister looked at Sheldon who was carrying their luggage and then at her sister and sat down on her haunches and said, "Well, for a blind man he sure does get around okay. I guess he's an improvement over that dwarfy goofball, Lupo, ya dragged home the last time. And if ya loves each other, well, who the hell am I to judge 'sidering that sorry sack of shit _I_ married."

It wasn't a gold medal seal of approval but it was a start. Everyone saw the look on Penny's face whenever she looked at Sheldon and they all knew that if they wanted Penny in their lives, Sheldon was part of the deal.

At least he wouldn't be mistaken for a garden gnome.

* * *

><p>The next afternoon the entire clan descended on the farm. Penny's mother had put out the word that her daughter and her boyfriend were visiting and that a Pot Luck Luncheon was on the agenda for any who wanted to attend. They did, like locust on a wheat field in Biblical times, bringing covered dishes and beer and wine and liquor and…questions and stories that had Penny frazzled.<p>

"Sheldon, can we _please_ leave? I've about had it answering questions about…us and everything. And I know you're less than thrilled hearing about the Junior Rodeo Semi-Finals and all that high school cheerleader crap. Can we please just slip out and never, ever come back?"

"Go grab yourself something to drink. Your dad and some of your friends are going skeet shooting and I'm invited. I already said 'yes', Penelope. Would you have me break my word? I'd like you to tag along and be my eyes, okay?"

She was sitting on his lap with her head tucked under his chin and she felt safe – for the moment. Actually, she was embarrassed by some of her old friends, especially some of the guys she'd had sex with. For once she was glad Sheldon was blind and couldn't see how bad her taste in men had been way back then.

"Okay. Lemme grad some booze and off we go. They just shoot clay pigeons over the field. It won't hurt to watch." She cringed at her thoughtless words but he didn't mind. He was used to figures of speech that excluded him because of his blindness.

* * *

><p>"PULL!" Penny's dad hollered, and some guy from Penny's past jerked on the lanyard and a clay pigeon shot out over the field. He missed the first time but hit it with his second shot. Sheldon thought he could hear the whir of the pellets flying through the air.<p>

"Penny, too bad your man is blind as a bat else he could show us how a theeeee oh rectal physical shoots. Bet he doesn't even know which end of a gun the bullets come out of…" Several of the younger men laughed, already shit-faced but envious.

"He's using a 4-10 shot gun, possibly a 3 round pump with an 18 ½ inch barrel. Probably a shotgun he's had for quite some time considering how easily the action moved. I'd say a Remington or a Browning but I'd have to handle it to be certain."

No one said anything because he was right on target.

"I'm from Texas," he said as an explanation.

Penny was so proud of her Sheldon and she wanted her daddy's approval so badly that she let her mouth run clean away from whatever good sense she had.

"I'll betcha even blind he can hit one of those clay pigeons. Waddya say, Moon Pie, show them what an award-winning theo-retical-physicist can do." She stressed the title to correct one of her ex-boyfriends.

Sheldon jerked off his aviator sunglasses and handed them to Penny, glaring at her. At least one of his detractors had the decency to whisper loudly, "Oh, Lordy, look at his eyes!"

"I'll need absolute quiet and I mean absolute! Penny, point me in the general direction of the field and Wayne, please be good enough to reload your fine piece of American workmanship."

Penny could have died on the spot when she saw the look on her daddy's face – pity – but not for Sheldon but for her. She'd pushed her boyfriend into a no-win situation with her big mouth. They'd have to talk about it later. No man could step away from such a challenge and while he was proud of the beanstalk for having the balls, he was ashamed of his daughter for humiliating what he considered 'a good man'.

Sheldon allowed Penny to shift him by his shoulders until he was facing the field. "PULL!" he said, loudly and with confidence he didn't feel. Sure enough, he could hear the fluttering of the clay pigeon and he turned toward the sound and fired once, hesitated, and then fired again.

He missed the first time but shattered the clay pigeon on the second shot.

"Drat! Forgot to allow for drift." He handed the shotgun towards where he thought Penny's dad was standing and then Penny attacked him, hugging him and covering his face with kisses to the cheers of the on-lookers.

"Sheldor the Conqueror does it again! I knew you could do it. You blasted Winkle with no eyes and she was shooting back. I knew you could do it. Oh, I'm so proud of you, Shel."

"Hold on, hold on," one of the guys said. "Sheldor the Conqueror…that makes you…Queen P! Holy shit! You two are a legend on Halo and Age of…" He stopped, realizing he'd outed himself as a Gamer and a Nerd.

Penny just beamed and even Wayne squeezed Sheldon's shoulder in appreciation. So much better than the loopy little hobbit. He sighed and figured he'd better start savin' up for the wedding.

Next: Penny and Missy plot against Sheldon


	14. Chapter 14

Had this chapter hit me while packing. Penny/Missy plotting in next chapter.

Friday I'll be back. Maybe. Yeah, Friday. I'm posting this from my phone so if the thing don't work, don't hate me.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 14<p>

_"Sheldon, help me! Help me! I've got a cramp!"_

_He heard her splashing in the pool near him but when he swam over to where he thought she was, she called for help from another direction. "I'm coming, Penny…I'll save you…"_

_He swam toward her voice but again she called out to him to save her, that she couldn't…and then there was silence except for the loud beating of his heart. His wife…had drowned and he hadn't been able to save her because he couldn't find her, couldn't see her and so he couldn't save her._

_Because he was blind._

Penny woke with a start when Sheldon dumped her out of bed and onto the motel room floor, sat up and scream-chanted 'Danger! Danger!' He hadn't done that since the first time they'd slept together back in Pasadena and she could feel his body quaking with the force of his sobs.

He was dreaming and whatever he was dreaming about terrified him.

She crawled up onto the bed and wrapped her arms around him and whispered that she was here and had him safely in her arms and that she loved him. She repeated it like a mantra until his sobs ending in hitching breaths and he pulled her down beside him in the bed and wrapped himself around her.

"Shel, want to talk about what got you so upset?"

He shook his head and drew lazy circles on her lower back. "Well, have you had this dream before?" Again he shook his head. Penny noted that his body was still rigid and that he'd perspired a lot and he smelled – like fear.

"Sheldon, would you feel better, cleaner, if we took a quick shower? The warm water will help you relax, okay? I'll run the water and you come in when you're ready." He nodded and sniffed and she kissed his sweaty head and padded over to the bathroom to run the water.

Sheldon sat on the edge of the bed, elbows on knees, with his face in his hands.

_It had been so real and I was so helpless. What if something like this happened for real and I…let her die because I couldn't see?_

Penny grabbed his wrists and pulled him up into another hug and then led him to the shower. It was an enclosed stall with a separate bathtub. She made a note to always stay at Best Westerns when they traveled in the future. The stall had rails on the sides, screwed into the tile so he could grab hold if he got dizzy.

"Shel, do you want me in there with you or would you rather I sat on the throne in case you get dizzy?"

He reached out to her and she allowed him to lead her into the stall. He fumbled around for the body wash but Penny took the bottle and replaced it on the ledge. "You grabbed the conditioner by mistake, sweetheart. Here's the body wash." She felt more than heard him sigh. She didn't know what had spooked her whackadoodle but she meant to find out.

The shower head was fixed so there was a lot of maneuvering around in the small stall but they finally got rinsed off and she went through her totally unnecessary ritual of drying him off with a towel. It was a turn-on for her and she loved doing it for him.

"Okay, gimme a minute to dry off and it's back to bed, baby."

"I couldn't find you." He didn't speak loudly but she heard him. "Pardon? I was right there in bed beside you."

"No, in the swimming pool. You called my name out in panic. You had a cramp and you called for me to save you but…but I couldn't find you, Penny. I swam towards your voice but you kept moving around and I couldn't find you. I dove down time and again but I couldn't find you…you drowned and it was my fault, Penny. I feel so useless…"

"Sheldon Lee Cooper – you are not useless. Stand up. Get off your ass and stand up, Sheldon!" She went to their bags and found the swim suit she'd bought him and then knelt before him and said, "Put these on. I'm right here so don't worry about falling. Just – just put them on."

When he had the trunks on Penny went to her bag and pulled out her bikini and slipped it on.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the door. "Penny – what are you doing?" He tried to stand his ground but she was determined to go through with what she planned. He wasn't useless and she would prove it – or die trying.

She opened a metal gate and then pulled him to her and closed the gate behind them. "Okay, Shel. You know I can't swim, right? Well, I'm going swimming and you – my not useless, never useless – lover are going to come in and save me."

She turned away and walked to the edge of the pool. She was terrified of the water but was more terrified of seeing Sheldon broken by a dream.

"One – two – three!" She jumped off the edge of the pool into six feet of water. And promptly sank to the bottom, her arms flailing and her body screaming at her for air.

She pushed herself off the bottom and gasped for air. "Shel – " She sank again and again she pushed herself up off the bottom of the pool and dragged in a breath and screamed "Sheldon – " and went down again…for the third time.

She was growing tired and dizzy and then panic set in. He couldn't find her and she'd drown…and he'd never forgive himself. She was fighting the urge to take a breath when strong arms went around her from behind and then she broke the surface and could breathe!

Sheldon couldn't believe her. She was nuts. He dove into the pool and then waited for her to make a noise, anything that would lead him to her. He treaded water and waited for what seemed an eternity before he heard his name called "Shel – " and he headed off in that direction, using a breaststroke. He stopped and treaded water again and heard "Sheldon – " followed by splashing and then silence.

He dove down and started feeling his way toward where he thought the sound came from, waving his arms around, hoping to touch her body, her hair, any where.

He felt a wisp of hair against his fingers and lunged forward, arms extended, and wrapped her up in his arms and pushed off the bottom of the pool to the surface.

They were back in their motel room and Sheldon was sitting on the commode lecturing her, pissed off beyond belief. She was in the shower, rinsing the chlorine out of her hair and occasionally going "Okay, Sheldon" or "You're right, Shel" but then he quit talking and stepped into shower stall and just wrapped her in his arms and held her.

"You saved me, Sheldon Cooper. You are not useless. Far from it." She leaned back and let him hold her close. Disaster averted.

* * *

><p>They were about an hour from Galveston and so far Sheldon hadn't said more than two words to her and she had to ask questions to get him to speak. He'd held her tightly all night and didn't speak to her then either. If this was Angry Sheldon, his hizzy fits in Pasadena back before they got together were nothing in comparison to his – his damned silence.<p>

She pulled off at an exit and followed the signs for a Burger King. She hadn't eaten at all and she could hear Sheldon's stomach growling occasionally.

"We're going to eat and talk, Sheldon. I can't take another mile of your sullen silence. Yell at me, curse me but don't shut me out, okay?" She pulled into the drive-thru and placed their order and then drove to a secluded part of the lot and parked.

She tossed his burger and fries in his lap and then got out and walked over to a picnic bench. Two could play this game. Whatever was bugging her boyfriend needed to be discussed, not ignored.

_I don't understand what crawled up his ass and died!_

Sheldon ate a French fry and unwrapped his cheeseburger and took a bite. Everything tasted like cardboard and he had no appetite at all. He would never understand how someone who professed to love him could do that to him. The dream was bad but the reality was far worse.

He fumbled around and got the door open and heard her call him. He walked over and felt the picnic bench with his hand and sat down. He took off his sunglasses and stared up at the sun. It was easy to find where it was in general because of the heat differential. The bright sunlight made his eyes water even if he was blind. He didn't blink, just stared at the sun, food forgotten.

_What's he doing? His eyes…is he crying? Oh, shit, he's crying!_

She was up and around the picnic bench and had her arms around him and told him not to cry, that what ever was wrong, they could fix it.

"I'm not crying. I'm making a point. I can't see. I'm blind. Suppose I failed to find you last night in the pool? Suppose I couldn't revive you if you'd drowned? Suppose…"

"But you didn't, Shel. You saved me. You used your senses and you found me. You're not useless. I proved that last night."

"Damn you, Penny! What if I failed? What if you drowned? How am I supposed to live without you? What's the point of _living_ without you?"

She could see his point of view. It was a stupid thing to do but she trusted him and knew he wouldn't let her down.

"Shel, you needed a real life demonstration that you _are_ useful, that there's _nothing_ you can't do if you just use what talents you have. I'm sorry I scared you and I'm sorry I didn't think it through but that's why I have you, to think things through."

"Finish eating, Penny. It's getting dark." She smiled and put her hand on his and said, "Sheldon, it's always dark according to you."

They were okay.

* * *

><p>They were staying at his grandmother's house. Sheldon had called her to make plans and she told him that he and 'his girlfriend, <em>finally,'<em>' were staying with her and no bones about it, they could sleep with or without each other but it didn't matter at all to her. Times changed and she needed to accept those changes.

"Moon Pie, you know your momma will drive you crazy with healers putting hands on you and her damned Prayer Circle chanting in the background. Now, I respect her for her faith but damn, boy, she needs to learn some moderation!"

Missy was in town and had been calling Penny hourly for progress reports. Sheldon finally took the phone from her and recited the accident statistics attributable to cell phone use while driving, told her they would see her 'when we see you' and she shot back with 'fat chance you'll see anything, bat…' and then there was a painful silence before Sheldon flipped the phone closed, ending the call.

He sighed and turned to look out the window. Penny grabbed her phone from his hand and called Missy. "Hey, you better watch your mouth around your brother, Melissa Cooper. You might not be as smart as him but you're a damned sight crueler! You owe him an apology and if he doesn't get it, I'm going to kick your ass until you do. And if that doesn't work…I'll tell Me Maw and she'll fix you right up!"

Penny looked at the gas gauge and cursed. She took the next exit and stopped at a gas station. Sheldon sat in the car while she pumped gas and yelled at Missy on the phone for a while.

"I'm sorry, okay? He just always gets my motor running and I keep forgetting to keep my big mouth shut. Look, any hope of him regaining even partial vision?"

"We won't know until later, maybe August. He's still healing and his eye doctor won't operate until he's healed so we just don't know."

"So, how's my brother in the sack, Penny?" There was dead silence and then Penny started to giggle.

"That bad, huh? Well, maybe he just needs some pointers. I got a few websites I can recommend…"

"He's wonderful, Missy. He exceeds any woman's expectations."

"Ewww, I was just kidding, Penny. I don't like to think of you and my bro getting it on. I need brain bleach. The scarecrow and Barbie just don't fit in my mind."

"It's not _your_ mind he's been sending into orbit almost every night. You have no idea…ewww…I don't want to even talk about it with you. You're his sister."

Missy decided to have some fun at Penny's expense and Sheldon's, of course.

"Penny, Penny, Penny…we're from Texas. You know how brothers and sisters are down here. Close, real close…after all, I did spend 9 months with my legs wrapped around his head…"

"Missy…I…you…he…" She'd had her fun. "NO! I was just funnin' with you. God, no. He's so dorky…"

"Not anymore he ain't, Missy. He's changed. He's different. You'll see."

A/N: NOW you'll see plotting!


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: You're gonna hate me but it's part of the story I have in my head.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 15<p>

Penny had no idea what to expect when she met Sheldon's beloved MeMaw but it wasn't the tall, thin woman with gray hair and Sheldon's cerulean blue eyes and a smile that melted hearts.

She was swept up in a hug and the older woman whispered that she was so glad her Moon Pie had finally found a woman worth his time. "Y'know, Sweet Pea, Shelly's special and it'll take a special woman to hold on to him. He's going places, he is, and don't think for one damned minute that being blind will hold him back."

"I know, but he might have a shot at seeing in the left eye. The right's just hopeless. And he's going to win the Nobel Prize for Physics some day and everyone who was ever mean or hateful to him is going to have to line up and kiss his ass!"

The older woman leaned back and looked down at the short blonde and grinned. "You damn well betcha he's gonna with that prize. As for those fools who mocked him…they'll still be losers in the mornin', darlin', while Moon Pie will be a prize winner."

After a dinner of fried chicken, fresh peas, mashed potatoes and peach cobbler for desert, they retired to the back porch to 'set a spell and tell me all about the goin's on in California'.

Sheldon talked about work, Penny's new job and their trip but nothing about his eyesight. "You been tiptoeing around the accident, Shelly Bean, now tell me what happened."

Penny put a hand on Sheldon's and told his grandmother about the duel and how Sheldon had protected her and his friend and what it cost him. The old woman dabbed at her eyes but there was pride in them.

"Tomorrow early, we need to ride out and check the fence. Shelly Bean, I added a bit of land and now I got to make damned the survey was right. We'll do that at first light and then I suppose," and here she sighed, "we'll have to go visit your momma and the dingbat sister of yours."

Sheldon's grandmother bid them goodnight and Penny and Sheldon did the dishes. She was amazed at how he knew where everything went. He just laughed and told her that he'd spent the happiest days of his youth right here in the kitchen. "And it was always my job to do the dishes after she cooked fried chicken. That's why she went to bed and left us the mess."

Lying in bed, the couple whispered to each other about impressions and Penny told Sheldon that his MeMaw was not at all what she expected. She imagined a woman who was small, wore old fashioned clothes and wore her hair in a bun. She hadn't expected to find a tall woman wearing jeans, boots and a work shirt.

"She's worked every day since my earliest memories. This is a large place and she works it alone. I send her money each month to hire a hand but she just banks it. The first couple of checks were returned to me with an angry letter but I was persistent and wore her down."

"That's sweet, Moon Pie. There are more layers to you than a Vidalia Onion, and each is just as sweet." She punctuated here comments with soft kisses but the day of confrontation and travel had taken its toll and they fell asleep.

* * *

><p>Sheldon unceremoniously dumped Penny on the floor when he reacted to the pounding on their bedroom door in typical Sheldon-fashion. "Danger! Danger!" He looked around, uncertain of where he was and his missing girlfriend fed his fears.<p>

"Penny!" Her side of the bed was warm so maybe she'd just gone to the bathroom. He flopped back on his pillow and smiled when he felt her soft hands use his arm to pull herself back into bed. "Why were you sleeping on the floor?"

"I wasn't until you pulled that 'Danger-Danger' routine and dumped me on my heinie. Kiss it, baby, and make it better?"

"BOOM-BOOM-BOOM" The door rattled and she 'eeked' and grabbed her boyfriend around the neck and squeezed. "What the hell?"

"Breakfast is on the table and the sun's been up for 15 minutes. Get up, you two. We're gonna ride the north fence line and fix any breaks and check the survey."

* * *

><p>Penny groaned as she got out of the old 1954 Willys Jeep. <em>She probably never got the damned shocks replaced after 1970 and there was absolutely NO padding in that damned seat! Oh, my aching heinie.<em>

Sheldon's grandmother power-walked into the house after announcing 'Moon Pie, your momma and her brood are coming for lunch. You be nice to George Jr. now.'

"Sheldon, my butt's busted. Can we slip up to the room and you can give me one of your world famous massages?" She ran her hand through his hair and pecked a kiss on his cheek. "I really missed you last night, Shel."

"But Penny, I was lying right beside you – oh! Well, we do need to clean up. I suppose I could squeeze in a quick massage…" He'd come a long way towards understanding innuendo but still had a problem with sarcasm.

* * *

><p>They ate lunch out on the back porch. Penny hadn't noticed the long picnic table and benches but could imagine a younger Cooper family sitting around it drinking lemonade and eating and laughing. Unfortunately, the laughter was missing from the older crowd these days.<p>

"So, how much is he paying you to stay with him? Must be a bundle." Sheldon's older brother was an asshole and Penny felt uncomfortable as he eye-raped her across the picnic table. Penny didn't say anything in response, just looked down at her plate. She was horribly embarrassed.

"Shelly, y'all let me know when you're through with her. I'd like to tap that." Sheldon's mother asked for a definition of 'tap that' and then scolded her elder son for his rudeness.

"George Cooper, Jr., there are ladies present…even if one has fallen into sin." Penny glanced over at Sheldon and saw that he and his grandmother had identical looks on their faces. Narrowed eyes, bloodless lips pressed into a thin line and hands clenched in fists.

Penny bolted from the table and ran out into the backyard. Me Maw slapped Sheldon's mother hard across the face and then punched her eldest grandson hard in the face.

"Melissa, help Sheldon find Penny. Mary Cooper, you and your worthless son are no longer welcome in my home. I have no idea how my son put up with you and your hypocritical ways. It's no wonder he drank himself into an early grave. And George Jr., you're out of my will. Missy and Moon Pie will share in my bounty after I'm gone – now get out of my sight!"

* * *

><p>"Shelly, she's sitting down at the base of our swingin' tree and she's mighty upset. Go calm her down and bring her back. I've got to calm Me Maw down before her blood pressure spikes again. Go on, Shelly. She's no 'fallen woman' in God's eyes. He's sent you an angel, big brother, and she needs you now more than you need her."<p>

Missy turned her brother in the right direction and then gave him a gentle shove. She turned on her heel, murder in her eyes.

"Penny, are you there?" He knew right where she was. He followed the sounds of her sobs. "People, my family in particular, can be needlessly cruel. Penny, we're leaving. I've seen my Me Maw and Missy and now it's time to go home, sweetheart."

He wasn't one to use pet names but there were times and this was one of them. He bent down and helped her up and just wrapped her in a warm embrace.

"Penny, I love you. I want so much more for you than you can imagine. What I never, ever, want is for you to be humiliated by hypocrites. I have Me Maw and Missy and now I have you and that's all the family I need. We're going home, Penny."

"I'm not a whore, Sheldon. Your mother – " He pressed his finger tips against her lips. " - Is a bitter woman who never loved anyone but her own unique version of Jesus and money. I don't doubt for one minute that if a divine being did exist, and I'm not saying there is or isn't one, but if it did exist, it would hardly want a cruel and judgmental woman in its 'heavenly home'."

* * *

><p>Missy and Me Maw were all smiles through tears when the couple was leaving. "Shelly, please don't go. Momma is crazy as a loon and doesn't know half the time what she's saying and George is…at the dentist and won't show his face again while you're here."<p>

"Damage is done. We're gone. Me Maw, think about coming out to Pasadena, the both of you, for a visit. I have no interest in seeing any other 'Cooper' for the foreseeable future."

His grandmother took Sheldon aside while Penny and Missy hugged and cried. They were good friends but George Jr's comment ruined the visit.

"Here, Moon Pie. I want you to have this but don't keep it. Give it away when the time's right. And by the way, you and Missy will inherit all this when I'm gone. I'm changing my will come Monday morning. Now, go back home, be happy, and enjoy life with Penny. She's special, boy, and 'special' don't come around twice in the same lifetime!"

* * *

><p>Sitting in the car as Penny drove up I35, Sheldon ran his thumb around the object in the palm of his hand. A line of dialogue from TTOTR flew through his mind…'and one to bind them'.<p>

"Penny, let's find a motel. With a pool. It's time you learned to swim on your own." He wanted to give her a confidence boost. If he was being totally honest, he also wanted any excuse at all to touch her. It had been a trying day.

Penny thought 'on your own' meant that he was breaking up with her in his own uniquely Sheldonesque way.

"Sheldon, we're not getting a motel. We're going back to Pasadena and then I think we need to reconsider our arrangement. You can sleep while I drive. I'm gonna miss this car."

"Penelope…find a damned motel. You are going to learn how to swim if it takes all damned night. And for your information, I _gave_ you this car. It's in _your_ name. I didn't give it to you because you were fucking me. I gave it to you because…just find a damn motel with a pool."

Penny's glare softened. He never cursed, well, hardly ever, and the only time he talked 'dirty' was in bed, or in the shower, or on the couch, or in the laundry room, or…to make a point.

"Fine. We'll get a damned motel. With a pool. And then we need to talk, Sheldon."

"Yes, we do, Penny, but not now. I have thinking to do. Turn on the radio if you like but I do not wish to engage in conversation." For a minute Penny flashed on 'old Sheldon' and wondered if this was how he was going to deal with their breakup…revert to type?

She saw a billboard for Best Western and got off the interstate and checked them in using Sheldon's credit card and then went out and led him up to their room. He carried their bags with no trouble.

"Sheldon, we need to reconsider our relationship. I don't think – " but Sheldon interrupted her with, "No, Penny, you don't. You resolve issues by making emotional decisions instead of logically, using sound methodology. Now, change into your bathing suit. I'm going to teach you how to swim."

Irked, she undressed, throwing everything onto the bed instead of hanging them up in the closet or wardrobe like she usually did, and slipped into her bikini.

"Okay. Are you just going to stand there or are you going to 'teach me how to swim' wearing jeans and a shirt?" Her tone was sharp and it didn't go unnoticed but he ignored it and opened his suitcase and removed his suit from the large Ziploc bag. It was still damp and he shuddered when the clammy suit seemed to wrap itself around his genitals. Penny just smirked.

She guided him to the deserted pool and he said, "Shallow end, Penny. You first need to overcome your fear and the best way is to learn how to float. Then you'll master treading water and then we'll get into the 'swim of things'. He didn't seem to acknowledge his play on words. In fact, his face took on the same look she'd seen on both his and his Me Maw's faces when George Jr ran his mouth.

The water was still warm from the sun and she guided Sheldon into waist-deep water. "Penny, turn around and lie back. I'll have your shoulders and I won't let your face go under." She turned around and looked at him but between the aviators and his thin-lipped scowl, she was uncertain but turned around and leaned back.

Sheldon's arms went beneath her shoulders and her butt. "Penny, relax. Just pretend you're in bed. Let your arms dangle and spread your legs a bit and let the water support you." She found it hard not to roll over on her stomach and stand up. She could feel herself tremble and got mad – at herself. She forced herself to relax and just enjoy the cushiony support of the water. She was tired and between the warm water and the feel of his arms around her…

"Penny, stand up, please." His voice sounded far away. She stood up and looked around. He was sitting 10 feet away on the side of the pool looking very smug with that Cheshire cat smile that preceded a 'Bazinga!' in better times.

"I estimate that you 'floated' for nearly five minutes. You need to practice doing it but I think we need to move on to treading water. Your clothing might be too heavy and you won't always be able to float." He scooted off the side of the pool and held out his hand. He was in chest-deep water for him so it was almost over her head.

She grabbed his hand and he pulled her against him and spun her around so that she faced away from him. "Okay, you'll need to use your legs and arms in tandem. I've got you so you won't go under water. Kick your legs like you're trying to kick off the blankets on your bed and wave your arms back and forth out to your sides, cupping your hands." He took his hands from under her arms and she started to sink and panic.

"ShelDON!" She yelled for him and he put his hands on her sides and kept her from going under. "You need to use more forceful kicks of your legs and you need to keep your arms waving in the water. It creates lift and keeps you from going under. Do it again."

"Again. Penny, point your toes and keep your legs together and cup your hands."

"Better. Again."

"Good, now take a break." He let her go and she immediately started to tread water but was tiring. "Sheldon, I…" He moved further away and said simply, "float, Penny."

And she did. She felt a huge grin break out on her face and wished he could see it. Without thinking, she rolled over to find him and went under. Strong arms gathered her up and held him close to his chest.

"Penny, you have to think things through. You can't be so…Penny, what would happen if I weren't here? You have to think things through. I won't always be around – "

"Are you breaking up with me, Sheldon? Is that what this is all about? You're showing me how to 'survive without you' in your own way? Just come out and say it - you don't want to be with a whore. You should have left me back in Galveston. I'm sure your brother would take care of me in return for the occasional 'tap'."

It's hard to fight when your boyfriend is holding you up in the deep end of the pool and you can't swim. It's hard to argue with your boyfriend when your arms are wrapped around his neck and your face is buried in his neck and you're crying.

It's really hard when the guy you're fighting with is trying to explain that he wants you to be able to survive if you fall into the water…because he might not be around…and he couldn't live without you.

It's _**really **_hard to argue when he says 'you're right though, we do need to reconsider the arrangement', and then he asks you to marry him.

And it's the most difficult thing in the world to say, "No, I'm sorry, but I can't." But you do.

A/N: Don't hate me. Just remember, I don't do Unhappy endings.


	16. Chapter 16

I'm stuck in BFE for the weekend so here's the next installment. A little appreciation might be in order, please? I don't beg...I get lazy and ignore the laptop...lol

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 16<p>

* * *

><p><em>And it's the most difficult thing in the world to say, "No, I'm sorry, but I can't." But you do.<em>

Sheldon unwrapped Penny's arms from around his neck and held her at arms' length by her wrists so she wouldn't go under. He felt the pool water swirling around them and knew she had instinctively began to 'tread water'. He didn't know what to do or say. He had never, in his wildest imaginings, ever considered that she'd say 'no'.

"Sheldon, I – " She wanted to explain why she couldn't marry him but the look on his face frightened her. His lips were pressed in a bloodless line and his face was pale and angry, not Sheldon's usual countenance when he was riled, but almost the same as she'd seen when his brother had insulted her. Only this was far worse.

"Please direct me to the pool side and I'll help you out. I need a shower as do you. It's getting…late." Late, not dark. No attempt to lighten the situation as in other times of conflict.

"Sheldon, it's to your left. The side of the pool is 10 feet to your left." He took her hand and swam rapidly to the side of the pool and then lifted himself out. He reached down, she grabbed onto his hand and pulled her up and made sure she was steady on her feet and then he walked along the wrought iron fence until he came to the gate. He waited because he had no idea which room they were in. He needed her help one last time.

Penny cried herself to sleep while Sheldon was in the shower. He wouldn't speak to her or even acknowledge her existence. It was like she was alone in the room.

* * *

><p>She woke up still in her bikini but Sheldon had covered her with the bedspread. His side of the bed didn't look as if anyone had slept there and the sheets were cold to the touch.<p>

"Sheldon?" She got up and walked into the bathroom but it was Sheldonless. Penny did her business then turned on the shower. He was probably walking around the motel or sitting in the lobby listening to the news on TV while taking advantage of the motel's free continental breakfast. Another point for Best Western.

She fixed her hair and dressed quickly in jeans and a tank top and went to find him. She needed to explain her answer to his question, why she said 'I can't' and get him to understand that she couldn't marry him _because_ she loved him more than she thought possible.

Sheldon wasn't in the lobby listening to the TV news nor was he in the small restaurant. She asked the desk clerk if he'd seen him and he nodded. He'd called a cab for the man and when the cab driver came in to get him, 'because he's blind, y'know', he heard Sheldon tell him to take him to the nearest bus station.

Penny thanked him and hurried back to their room. Sheldon had left his credit cards, a wad of cash and a note. His bag and his cell phone were gone but the car keys were atop the note. She could hardly read his scrawl before he lost his sight but this - she could make out 'home', 'sorry' and 'love you'. There was also an engagement ring beside her keys.

'Oh, Moon Pie, why didn't you talk to me. Why didn't you ask me why I couldn't marry you? Why didn't you wait?'

Home. Where was home? Pasadena or Galveston? She knew how his mind worked, how he felt right this very minute and it tore her up that she made him feel that way.

She called the bus station and asked them to page him. She waited and waited and finally the woman said that no one was answering the page.

"Do you see a blind man wearing mirror-tinted aviator glasses sitting around?" Sheldon was stubborn and probably wouldn't answer the page knowing it was her.

"Oh, yeah." Her heart leaped into her mouth. She could be there in 10 minutes. "Yeah, I sold him a ticket early this morning. His bus left at 6:30 this morning."

"Where was he going? Do you remember?" The clerk put her on hold while she went to check her records.

"Ma'am, are you there?" the clerk asked Penny. "Yes! Did you find his ticket? Where's he going?"

"Galveston. Galveston, Texas."

Penny nearly dropped the phone. Galveston? Why in the world would he be going back to _Galveston?_

His family would be of little help if he asked them why she wouldn't – no - _couldn't_, marry him.

Her own family couldn't have helped him. They didn't know because they were the primary reason she'd said 'no'.

His family ran a close second and then there were all her friends and even Howard and poor Leonard.

She didn't believe in marriage. Her parents' marriage was a shambles. Her sister's marriage was the poster child for marrying someone for no other reason than he'd knocked her up. She was always one beer away from divorce court. Sheldon's mom drove her husband to drink and from what she could see, George Jr and Missy were dysfunctional byproducts.

And then there were her friends: Howard's father left them when he was just a boy. Leonard's mother was divorcing her husband for scientific purposes. Amy's parent was 'disturbed'.

And then there was Penny. She never had a stable relationship. Sure, she'd hung with Kurt for nearly 4 years but that was different, unhealthy and totally co-dependent. She sought out suitable mates, fucked them senseless, then tried to establish something that wasn't based on sex, and always, always cast them out when the dreaded 'L' word was uttered.

Until Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, PhD, entered her life and gave her his trust, his love and a future as more than 'the Whore of Babylon', a fallen woman, the Big Ol' Five on the Sexual Aggression Scale.

His mother had clearly 'abandoned' him at birth, leaving society to shit all over him because of his brilliance, because he wouldn't conform to their idea of 'normal'. His mother did nothing to help him except have him tested to prove he wasn't insane.

Only his Me Maw (and to _a much_ lesser extent Missy) saw what a shining jewel in the Texas dirt her grandson was and had tried to protect him but even she could only do so much.

So why in the hell was he going to _Galveston_?

* * *

><p>Earlier<p>

Sheldon hadn't slept. He was busy recalibrating his relationship paradigm with Penny. He had questions but he knew better than to ask them since she was deeply asleep and he knew she needed to sleep. His mind demanded answers, though, and so he tried to find them within his own inerasable memories.

He was reliving the memories of the period of the 'Great Breakup' when Penny and Leonard parted ways. He thought perhaps he had an inkling of why they'd split up but he couldn't be sure.

It was just past 4am when his cell phone chirped to alert him to voice mail message. Curious as to who would be calling him at this ungodly hour he opened his phone and replayed the voice mail message. He quickly dressed in the same clothes he'd worn yesterday (since he knew they'd match) even though wrinkled from travel, and slipped out of the motel room door.

He called his sister back and waited for her to answer.

"Shelly…it's Me Maw…she's had a stroke in the lawyers office. There was a terrible argument and…please call me when you get this voice mail. I – I know you're pissed at us and all but I know you want to be here for her so please, please, Shelly, you and Penny come home. It looks really bad, Shelly."

"I'll be home in 6 hours. Please arrange to meet me at the bus station. Tell Me Maw that her Moon Pie loves her and will be there as soon as possible."

"Bus station? Why can't Penny drive you back…oh, yeah, she's probably too mad at Momma and George Jr to even consider being in the same state but I promise you neither of them will say a thing except 'sorry', Shelly."

"As I said earlier, Melissa, please arrange to meet me at the bus terminal in Galveston. I'll call you when I arrive. If there's nothing further, I have packing to do and arrangements to make. Goodbye, Melissa."

He hung up and sat down heavily on the floor and cried. The two people most precious to him in the whole world were leaving him to face a dark future alone.

_Pull yourself together, Sheldon Lee Cooper, and get cracking. You have things to do._

He heard his grandmother's voice in his head and it galvanized him to action. He was packed in minutes and then realized he still needed to make allowances for Penny until he could get back to Pasadena and make final financial settlement.

Sheldon left his credit cards and all but a few bills of his cash on the desk. He fumbled around until he found the note pad and pen on the desk top and wrote her a note as clearly as he could, placed her car keys on top of it to ensure she saw it, and the antique engagement ring, and then left as quietly as he could.

* * *

><p>Galveston<p>

Melissa was waiting for Sheldon's bus to arrive. She was nervous as a cat in a room full of Chinese cooks but tried to hide it. Her companion hadn't said much, hadn't explained why her brother was arriving by bus nor why she'd arrived two hours earlier and called her.

In fact, she hadn't said much at all since then and that was disturbing in itself.

"Penny, why the hell are you here alone instead of with Sheldon? What's going on between you two? I know my Momma and my dickhead brother George hurt your feelings and all but why aren't you with Shelly?"

"I'm not and that's the end of it. I should be with him right now at his grandma's bedside but…shit happens, Missy, and a whole buncha shit happened yesterday and poor Moon Pie..."

And that's all she said other than thanking Missy for the coffee.

* * *

><p>The bus pulled in 10 minutes early and Penny was almost in tears when she saw her 'tall drink of water' get off the bus aided by a pretty young girl who made her feel old. It was obvious that she was hitting on Sheldon hard and it was just as obvious that he was typically oblivious to her attempts.<p>

Missy started to go to him but Penny grabbed her arm and shook her head. "Let him get his bag and get rid of the germ hanging on him and then I'll go to him. Please, Missy, I have to do this."

Sheldon said something to the short brunette who was hanging on his arm and she laughed and then palmed the side of his face and kissed his cheek. She turned and said something to someone and then was swept up into the embrace of a man with a guide dog.

'Oh, she wasn't hitting on him…she was helping him. Way to go, Penny.'

Sheldon stood his ground, seemingly deep in thought, but she knew he was waiting for Missy to call out to him. Instead, she walked up to him, put her arms around his suddenly stiff frame, and started to cry again.

"P-Penny?" He smelled her hair, her unique combination of scent that enabled him to sense her in a room full of people. Sheldon dropped his bag and wrapped his arms around her, not saying anything because, for once in his life, he had the good sense to just listen.

"I love you, Shel, more than anything in the world but marriage – all the married people I know are either divorced, horribly unhappy and fucking up their kids either way. My parents, my sister, your parents…look at them. I promise that I'll never leave you, Moon Pie, but we don't need some seal of approval to be together."

She reached into her jeans pocket and took out the ring and put it in the palm of his hand. "I'll wear this proudly but if you need some guarantee that I'll never leave you…"

He flinched. It was unintentional but he flinched. His mind was roiling through all the people he knew who were married and he couldn't think of a single instance where she was wrong. Not one. Except for Raj's family who he knew nothing at all about and look how he turned out.

"Your promise is enough for me, Penny. Let's go see Me Maw."

He planned on working at her, chipping away at her defenses, finding and showing her marriages that did work, people who were married because…then he stopped thinking. Except for property rights, what did marriage signify? He'd need to do research and that meant asking Howard to help him.

The sacrifices he made for Penny were small prices to pay. Then he had a thought and almost asked her if she was hesitant because he was blind?

"Yes, wear it because I want the world to know you're 'taken'. It's not an ownership issue, Penny, so please don't let your latent feminist anger boil over. I just want – "

"I want that too, baby. Now, here, put it on my finger and let's go tell Me Maw that you're engaged."

"I believe tradition dictates that a kiss – "

She pulled his head down and kissed him softly on the lips and then whispered that 'later on I'll show my appreciation but we really need to get to the hospital, Shel'.

A/N: Ha! Betcha had all kinds of hate stored up for me, didn't ya? Oh, ye of little faith.


	17. Chapter 17

Some of you have commented and PM'd that the 'pacing' in this story either (1)drags: 'when are we gonna get somewhere?; or (2)too fast: 'you got them in bed and traveling and now engaged? Not real'.

So I got to thinking and I'm going to do some time compression and wrap this sucker up in the next few chapters, skipping Penny's introduction to Academia and being hit on by horny grad students, etc. in the next 2 chapters.

Thanks for reading – all 247 of you. This is it until I get back home. Working tomorrow.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 17<p>

It was good to be home. Sheldon sat in 'his spot' while she busied herself with opening the windows and kicking on the air conditioning. The apartment smelled stale and stuffy after being empty for nearly two months. Once she got their things unpacked and sorted out the dirty clothes she would do laundry and sort through the mail. Sheldon had all the bills auto-drafted from his checking account so they were never in danger of returning to angry creditors and the gremlins from the electric company cutting off their juice.

They'd taken their own sweet time getting back to Pasadena from Galveston. And it _had_ been sweet. Sheldon took her to see the Meteor Crater in Arizona and then they spent an entire day at the Grand Canyon, staying in the Lodge and waking up to a gorgeous view – well, she did. That was the only fly in the ointment. He'd shared all these places and facts and figures with her, _for her_, and he couldn't see any of it.

And the sex had been frantic and hasty and slow and sweet and she'd never been or felt more loved in all her life. As for her Moon Pie, well, he had that grin, that little boy smile that said 'look what I got' on his face almost permanently.

Except when the subject of their future came up. Then it disappeared until the subject changed, or they fell asleep, or he seduced her and took her off on some wild carnal adventure, or she had her way with him until it was her name he whimpered.

But still, it was there, that damned pink elephant, sitting in the bed with them, riding along with them, listening to them talk, eating with them, watching over them, hovering, squatting on their moods.

It was the only thing that seemed to darken his mood, bring him down from his emotional high, take the light out of his eyes and the smile from his face. The future.

Despite everything she'd said and promised, despite his acceptance of her word, she knew he still thought that all this was temporary, transient, and that someday she'd be gone. And she couldn't figure out how to kill the elephant, convince him that she and he, _they, _were together until 'death do us part'.

* * *

><p>She was sorting through the mail and her Moon Pie was on the phone for his daily talk with his Me Maw and Missy. Missy had quit her job and moved in with their grandmother to 'help out' but actually to run the ranch and supervise the county nurses that came in daily to work with Me Maw on her physical therapy. She received a salary from the ranch and seemed happy and content.<p>

Penny sorted the mail between 'crap', CalTech, and 'unknown'. She would read through the mail from the university first, sort it by priority and then read it to Sheldon. The 'unknown' she'd leave for last and the 'crap' was already in the recycle pail.

He was done talking to Missy and had that special smile on his face so things must be going well in Texas. It had been hard on them to just 'leave' but Missy was in place and their grandmother was in great hands. Still, he worried about her. When details of the fight in the lawyers' office came to light, Penny saw a side of Sheldon she'd never seen before and hoped to God never to see again.

The _angry_ mad scientist.

* * *

><p>flashback<p>

If Sheldon hadn't been blind he would have been in jail facing multiple homicide charges. He would happily have killed his brother and his mother and would have smiled while doing it. They'd threatened to have Me Maw undergo a 'sanity evaluation' and have her committed to the County Asylum because she'd cut them out of her will leaving everything to Sheldon and Missy equally. George Jr would get nothing and his mother would get less. She wasn't even mentioned.

Sheldon contacted the hospital security and informed them that 'George and Mary Cooper' were the reason for his grandmother's hospitalization and were to be barred from the hospital. Next he called Howard and talked to him and Raj (back from India and still single and happy despite his parents' best efforts to marry him off 'to a nice Indian girl') and gave them specific instructions, account information and details. Within hours, Sheldon had brought fire and brimstone down on his mother and brother.

Their bank accounts were closed. The house was listed as 'vacant and for sale' at a ridiculously low price, George Jr's drivers license was suspended for DUI (which was only a matter of time anyway) and his name appeared on the Texas Rangers' 'Sexual Offender List' and a sign posted in their front yard (which in Sheldon's opinion was long overdue and only fitting considering what he'd said about his beloved Penny).

Howard was a great hacker but Raj was even better and they gleefully helped their dear friend and colleague 'bring the wrath of Mother Kali, Hindu Goddess of Destruction' down upon the miscreants.

Penny had stayed well away from Sheldon until he cooled off and calmed down and then laughed because in his opinion, 'Penny, the good guys finally won one'.

* * *

><p>"Hey, sweetie, I've got the mail sorted. There's a big packet for me from the Office of Faculty Affairs."<p>

"Oh, Penny, it's your paperwork for your Grad Assistant's position. You need to carefully complete the forms and then review the orientation packet. We'll need to go shopping for your new wardrobe and, of course, shoes. As much as I love you in shorts and tanks, the University does have its standards."

They spent the afternoon filling out forms, learning about her job description (Special Assistant to Dr. S. L. Cooper, PhD) and laughing at the pompous cover letter than Dr. Gabelhauser had written, welcoming her to the Department and offering his 'personal assistance' if she ever needed it.

"He just wants to get into my pants, Moon Pie, but don't you worry. You're the only guy with an 'anytime, anyway' pass. Only you, Shel, my one and only best friend and lover." She took every opportunity to assure him of her love and devotion and she took 'every' to mean just that.

"Penny, are you comfortable with announcing our engagement to our friends? We have no intention of marrying so I suppose we'll just tell them we anticipate a 'long' engagement period?"

"Yeah. Let's have a dinner out at some nice restaurant and invite the guys and their girlfriends and anyone else you want. We'll make it a special occasion. We haven't seen our friends in months!"

The elephant snorted and left the room. Things were back to normal for now.

"Oh, Shel, you got a letter from DARPA. It looks official. And it's from that place we can't talk about ever."

"Well, it's not going to inform us of its contents unless someone reads it to me." She elbowed him in the ribs muttering, 'Smart ass' and opened the letter. A check fell out onto her lap but she ignored it and read aloud:

"Dear Dr. Cooper:

Enclosed is our check for the exclusive patent rights to your recently developed Cooper-Hoffstadter Magnetic Containment Vessel. Please sign the enclosed release and return via certified mail.

Thank you for your cooperation and we wish you a speedy recovery. Blah, blah, blah."

"Shel – Sheldon…you're freaking MEGA-RICH!"

Penny held the check in her shaking fingers and looked over at her fiance in adoration, wonder and lust. The check was for more money than he already had in the bank – a helluva lot more. Like three times more.

"Penny, Penny, Penny, WE are, although I doubt 'mega' is an appropriate suffix in comparison to the wealth of that bastard who foisted Windows Vista on an unsuspecting populace, Bill Gates, or Warren Buffett, for that matter. 'What's mine is yours', remember? We signed an agreement stipulating that you have all rights and privileges of a spouse and it's legal and binding in all 50 states."

She leaned over and whispered the amount of the check and then shoved her tongue in his ear and giggled. He absolutely hated when she did that and his reaction was always unpredictable.

The mail went flying as she tried to escape the sneak attack of his fingers on her ribs. She was ticklish, something he used to great advantage, and she wasn't wearing a bra and her tank top was loose and out of her shorts in seconds and her laughter and clothing filled the room.

He always knew when to stop and change the tickling to soft strokes that inevitably led them to making love regardless of where they were. This time was no exception.

* * *

><p><em><strong>AN: No 'M' prose. Use your imagination. I'm not in the mood.**_

* * *

><p>Penny sent a text to both Howard and Raj, telling them that they were back and that it would be nice if they 'dropped by' later and said hello. She wanted Sheldon to be as comfortable as possible in his own environment and the guys were an essential part of his 'comfort' even if he never acknowledged it.<p>

The response 'we're on the way, lovely lady' brought a smile to her face. "Shel, honey, Raj and Howard are coming over. While you three get reacquainted, I'll do the laundry and then maybe the four of us can swing by the Cheesecake Factory and grab some dinner or order take out?"

"That would be acceptable but I wish you would not feel it necessary to leave just because Howard and Raj are coming by."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a slow and languorous kiss and sighed into his mouth. "Sheldon Lee Cooper, I have chores to do. And so do you. Bring the boys up to date and find out what gossip you can. I've been out of the loop and I want to hear all the juicy details."

* * *

><p>Howard hugged Penny when she opened the door and then stepped back and blushed – an impossibility before the 'incident'. She quickly looked down to make sure one of her boobs hadn't popped out of the tube top she was wearing.<p>

"Sorry, Penny, I just am so damned glad to see you. How is he? Not having Sheldon around is just plain weird."

"That's okay, Howard. I'm glad to see you too. Where's Raj?" She looked over Howard's shoulder but couldn't see her other friend.

"He's drinking a wine cooler so he can say 'hello' directly. Listen, don't bring up his trip to India. Something happened over there and he gets all tongue-tied and sad and lapses into Hindi." He glanced behind him to make sure Raj wasn't there before continuing. "He found a girl, a 'nice Indian girl' but his family doesn't approve, something about 'caste'. He's in a funk and won't take calls or Skype with them at all."

"Oh, poor Raj. What's he going to do?" She felt her heart break a little for their Indian friend. She knew how much family meant to the little guy but if he was cutting himself off from his parents…

"Don't know but I hope he does something soon. He drinks more than before. He doesn't want to do the bar scene and he's blown off more hot babes than I thought possible. He's in l-o-v-e so anything's possible."

"Howard, when you're done fondling my fiance's back, I'd appreciate your help on a matter of great importance to me." Sheldon couldn't see but he had a very vivid imagination.

"Sheldon! It was just a hug and then he actually blushed! Go on, Howard. I have laundry to do. Go find out what the Mad Scientist has up his sleeve this time."

Howard mouthed 'fiance?' and Penny nodded and held up her ring. "The first of the Musketeers to take the plunge. I'm so happy for you both."

"We haven't heard a thing from Leonard and he doesn't answer texts or emails." Penny hadn't brought up Leonard's name in any conversation since the swimming pool incident. She wasn't about to bring up a past lover when they were so 'new'.

"He went back to the-place-we-can't-ever-discuss and he hasn't been in contact since then. I think seeing you and Sheldon together has sent him into a depression again. You know how whiney he can be when he doesn't get his toys. I'm sure he's fine. I hope so. He's probably just up to his eyeballs in the project."

"Howard, we can all hear about Leonard at dinner. Oh, right, how presumptuous of me…Howard, would you join Penny and I at dinner some night? Our treat, of course. We'd like to share our news with our dear friends. That's Penny's opinion, of course. We'd like you and Raj and your current paramours to join us."

"Sheldon, that's really nice. Of course." He hadn't really looked at Sheldon but what he saw surprised him. "Sheldon, you're looking very GQ . Penny's influence, no doubt."

"Yes. I let her 'dress' me since I have no idea what goes with what. I find that jeans are very comfortable although a bit tight in the crotch at times, but Penny likes them. So, about my need for your assistance…"

"Oh, yeah. Got more hacks that you need done? The last one was fun but not that difficult."

"No more hacks. I've had my vengeance and besides, Penny made me promise to have you undo the damage wrought – but she never made me promise 'when'." He gave that evil cackle that sent chills up Penny's spine and made Howard smile.

"Now, Howard, I'm going to have to learn to read Braille, temporarily of course, but I find the vocalizer program to be clumsy and dependent on my steadiness with the integrated touch pad on my laptop. I was wondering…"

* * *

><p>Penny left to do the laundry, half fearing that Sheldon's Braille comment meant that he'd given up hope even though they still had another doctor's appointment later in the week.<p>

She ran into Raj just as she'd reached the landing leading to the laundry room. "Raj!" She dropped the laundry basket and gave her friend a hug. She missed him more than she wanted to admit. He'd always been her favorite Musketeer, after Sheldon, of course.

"Ah, Penny…you look fantastical. Radiant even. I take it you and Sheldon are well on your way to matrimonial harmony? Ah, how I envy you the freedom you Americans have." Raj was emotional at the drop of a hat and a whole hat store must have fallen because he started to cry on Penny's shoulder.

"Raj, what's wrong, sweetie? Talk to me. Maybe I can help."

"Ha! Can you undo a thousand years of tradition? Of prejudice? No. I have fallen in love, Penny. With a woman of a lower caste and as such, I am forbidden to marry her. My parents are scandalized that I have chosen an Untouchable as the woman to bear my sons and daughters and carry on the Koothrapalli name. I have been given a choice, my Aisha or my family. How can I choose?"

Penny was uncertain what Raj was talking about. She knew nothing about India except that they made more movies in a year then Hollywood had ever made, that the people there spoke English in a delightful sing-song manner and that Madras prints originated there. Oh, and there were elephants in India. And tigers.

"Raj, family is important but are you going to deny yourself love of a wonderful woman because of it? If they love you, they should also support your decisions. I don't know your culture, Raj, but I know _you_. Do what your heart tells you is right and do it quickly before she is lost to you forever. I know you'll make the right decision."

Raj sniffled a little and then smiled and nodded, suddenly unable to speak despite the wine cooler. "Go up and see Sheldon. We've missed you and you need to see how good he looks. I'll be up as soon as the laundry's done and then maybe we can order take-out just like old times."

Next: Meeting Aisha, Sheldon's doctor visit and Penny's first day of school.


	18. Chapter 18

First off, I apologize for the grammatical errors in the previous chapter such as 'then' instead of 'than' and since I know most of you are in middle school and just learning this stuff well, like your parents tell you – do as I say not as I do.

Also, I've decided to award Penny a surname: Drummond, since the show never gave her one. Another slam against women.

Now, the order of things in this chapter isn't quite the same as in the ending author notes from the last chapter but suck it up and read.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 18<p>

The doctor was characteristically blunt: The right eye was shot and the left eye had healed 'as much as can be expected' and so he scheduled a procedure to reattach the partially damaged retina for later in the week.

"Surgery isn't always successful in reattaching the retina. Also, a reattached retina doesn't guarantee normal vision. How well you see after surgery depends in part on whether the central part of the retina (macula) was affected by the detachment before surgery, and if it was, for how long."

"Dr. Cooper, your vision may take many months to improve after surgery. And please bear in mind that some people don't recover _any_ lost vision."

* * *

><p>When the couple left the physician's office, Penny was trying to keep from crying while Sheldon was trying to remember what his girlfriend was wearing the first time he laid eyes on her. Lately his 'eidetic memory' of her seemed to be fading, something that frightened him more than the probability of being permanently blind. He had always depended on his memory to provide images of her but lately…<p>

"Penny, a stupid question but please humor me. What color were the slacks you wore the first time we met?"

Penny had to think. "Um, I think I was wearing Capri pants and I think they were light brown or beige. Why?"

"Just validating data, that's all." Penny glanced at Sheldon skeptically. Sheldon never had to 'validate data' from his amazing memory. It was always there for him to dredge up. Was something else wrong?

As they drove back to Pasadena from Los Angeles, Penny asked if he was nervous about the upcoming procedure. "Y'know, Shel, no matter how things turn out, it won't change how I feel about you one iota." 'IOTA' was her 'word for the day'. She was working on building her vocabulary so that she wouldn't sound like a hick from the sticks around Sheldon's co-workers at the University. _'Iota: bit, jot, grain, tiny portion._

Sheldon sighed and turned his face toward the car window. "I know, Penny, I know. I never considered being blind until the probability of _never_ seeing you smile again became very real. I'm sorry. I guess I'm Mr. Depression today. I'll snap out of it."

* * *

><p>But he didn't. In fact, it got worse. She tried everything she could think of to jolly him out of his funk but nothing seemed to work. Finally, she snapped at him for something stupid. He'd spilled his ice tea and just sat there. He had tears in his eyes but she couldn't see them behind his aviator glasses that he now wore constantly except in the shower and in bed.<p>

"Damn it, Sheldon, don't just sit there, help me! At least use your napkin to blot up the tea. That's what it's there for. Maybe I need to get you a sippy cup…" and she stopped talking, horrified at what she said and just leaned over the sink trying not to cry.

"Sheldon, I'm sorry. I'm just – " but he was gone. She followed him into the bathroom and sat on the commode seat and waited for him to finish showering. She berated herself for allowing her fear of the procedure to forget how _he_ must feel. She picked up his clothes and put them in the hamper and waited.

"Shel, I'm sorry. I'm just scared, baby, that you won't get some of your eyesight back. You're the most important person in the world to me and I'm so sorry I lost my temper and said those horrible things."

"S'okay. You didn't say anything you haven't thought before. Look, I'm tired and I think I'm going to call it a night. Big day tomorrow for you – faculty orientation. Sleep well, Penny," and he kissed her on the forehead like he would a child.

Penny hardly slept at all that night. Sheldon had wrapped himself in the blanket and slept, balanced precariously on the very edge of the mattress – like before. The cold space between them mirrored the emotional gulf since she yelled at him.

* * *

><p>Sheldon tried to stay out of her way as she got ready for the orientation. She had to leave the apartment no later than 6:30am in order to make the Welcome Breakfast and then registration.<p>

"I'm off, Shel. Call me if you need me, sweetie. I'll be back as soon as it's over…wait, I need to pick up some groceries so I'll call ya from the store and we can go over our list together."

She kissed his cheek and left, still feeling guilty and unsettled by what happened at dinner. Penny was determined to make it up to him and cook him a marvelous dinner and then maybe a little wine cooler for Sheldon and then she'd drag his bones back to their bedroom and really show him how much he meant to her.

* * *

><p>Sheldon waited a few minutes to be sure that Penny was truly gone and not coming back for something forgotten and then he made a phone call.<p>

"Operator, this is Dr. Sheldon Cooper and I'm blind and unable to use Directory Assistance. Can you please look up the number for the California Blind Association and dial it for me? Thank you."

Sheldon got in a van shortly before 8 and took a seat and relaxed. The van pulled away from the curb and proceeded to the Association's Learning Center. From the chatting and conversations in the van, he wasn't the only blind person in Pasadena.

* * *

><p>Penny nibbled at her fruit plate balanced on her lap while she listened to Dr. Gablehauser go on and on about the unlimited opportunities to be found in Academia. She was definitely overdressed or else the Salvation Army was responsible for dressing the faculty.<p>

She basically zoned out until she heard "our own Dr. Sheldon Cooper, winner of the Enrico Fermi Medal and primary developer of the CHMCV. He is just one example of the outstanding members of our teaching and research faculty."

"Yeah, Bat Man, as in 'Blind as a…' she hears from behind her. She turns in her seat and sees a man she would have paid to have sex with 6 months ago, a Greek Adonis.

"What did you say about Dr. Cooper?" She could play 'dumb' as well as the next person. Some would say she came by it naturally but she was smart in more ways than book learning.

"He's one of the Brilliant Geek Squad. Rumor has it he got into it with some other prof and she threw acid in his face. He must be a real loser since the fight was about him not wanting to fuck her. Like I said, Geek Squad. I have him for a seminar this semester. I'm - "

"I don't care who you are." She cut him off and turned her attention back to Sheldon's boss just as Dr. Gabelhauser was introducing the staff and he gestured for her to stand. "This is Dr. Cooper's Special Assistant, Penny Drummond, and I'd like to welcome her to CalTech." She heard the Adonis asshole behind her mutter 'oh shit' and she almost giggled.

* * *

><p>Penny was walking through the gardens on her way to her car when 'Adonis' walked up behind her and asked her out. "No, thank you. I'm engaged," she held up her hand and wiggled her fingers. "Well, take the ring off and let me show you a really good time. When we're done, put it back on. A time-out does every relationship good. Keeps it from getting stale."<p>

Old Penny would have considered it and might actually have done so, but this was New Penny and it was no contest. He took her hesitation for weakness and he pressed his case.

"So who's the lucky fella, anyhow?"

"Batman." She kept her eyes on her car and continued walking. "Batman? No, c'mon, who is he?" He grabbed her arm to stop her and she turned and smirked at him.

"I told you, Batman, as in 'blind as a…'. Now, piss off before I kick your ass. My Sheldon is more of a man on his worst day than you'll ever be on your best."

"Oh, shit!"

Penny laughed and threw him the bird over her shoulder. She felt good, damned good, and she wanted to share her mood with her Moon Pie.

* * *

><p>Except that Moon Pie wasn't home. "Sheldon, I'm home…Sheldon?" She put the groceries on the kitchen table and looked through the apartment and checked for a note or anything that might tell her where her Whack-a-doodle fiance had disappeared to but there was nothing. She checked her cell but hadn't received a call or text. He hadn't answered his cell when she'd called from the grocery store. He hadn't answered the land line either.<p>

Penny wasn't worried. He may have simply called a cab and gone…where? The comic book store was out since he couldn't see them. That left…no place. She called Howard but he was out with Bernadette and Raj sent back a text saying he hadn't seen Sheldon.

Now she was worried.

* * *

><p>Earlier<p>

Sheldon sat patiently in the lounge. The chairs were very comfortable and he could easily have dozed off but he was running equations through his head trying to isolate the quark theorems for Truth and Beauty but he kept being sidetracked by thoughts of Penny.

"Dr. Cooper?" A soft voice called out his name and he stood and waited. He had developed a way of determining where and how far people were from him by their voice volume and tenor but he didn't know the 'lay of the land' and hardly wanted to land on his ass if he tripped over a coffee table or chair.

"Hi, Dr. Cooper. I'm Emaline and I'm going to take your arm and guide you back through the office to where Dr. Joiner will interview you. So, you won the Fermi prize for physics? Quite impressive."

Her voice was soft and her vowels had a strange roundness to them and her sentences almost sung. "Excuse me, Emaline, but where are you from? I can't place your accent."

"Barbados, Dr. Cooper. May I ask, how long have you been blind?" To the point but politely. He liked that.

"Nearly 4 months. An accident with acid. There is a chance at recovering some sight after reattaching the retina but I don't give it much hope. The doctor should learn to watch his tone and word selection. From what he said, er, the way he said it, I don't give it much hope."

"Well then, there is still hope. Now, Dr. Joiner will be with you in a moment. Can I get you anything? A book, a magazine?"

"Blind humor?" She hadn't realized it but Sheldon was getting really sharp at analyzing voices. "How long have you, if I might ask, been blind?"

"Since birth. The chair is directly behind you. If you are accepted, I'll be your instructor and tutor. I understand you're engaged? Does your fiance live with you?"

"Yes. She's also my 'eyes' at CalTech. I have a teaching load as well as research grants."

* * *

><p>The van driver helped Sheldon get off the mini-bus and handed him his bag. "See ya next week, Doc. Don't forget to call and schedule your ride."<p>

Sheldon trudged wearily up the stairs to his floor. The Association had an unyielding rule: second opinions. They weren't about to invest time and money in the 'temporarily blind'. Well, apparently they were willing to invest a bit in him now.

The Association's physician was Board Certified and knew his stuff. He recommended going ahead with the procedure and hope for some return of his sight but he had low expectations for success.

He checked his Vox-watch and frowned. He wanted to be home before Penny but it looked like he'd misjudged the time – again. His internal clock had been off-kilter lately, another sign of mental deterioration?

Penny heard him outside the door fumbling with his keys but stopped herself from opening the door. She wanted him to be as independent as possible.

"Penny, I'm home." He felt her presence in the apartment and smiled.

_I'll bet she has tales from the orientation. Those things are so damned boring but at least the breakfast was decent. He and Leonard had eaten so much that the catering staff stood watch over the food to ensure that everyone had something. They'd save a bundle that morning._

"Hey, Shel. Where ya been, Moon Pie?" He was carrying a box and his messenger bag looked stuffed more than usual.

"Well, I got a second opinion about my eyes and it's no different than the first one. So, Penny, you'll soon be free of reading me those boring journals. I've enrolled in a Braille training class that meets once a week at the Association training center."

Penny almost burst into tears. He was well into accepting his disability and adapting and adjusting while she was wallowing in self-pity. _I like reading those articles and journals to him even if I don't always, okay, almost never, understand them. It makes me feel useful to him, closer and a part of what he does._

He could hear her breathing change as she walked towards him. Sheldon thought perhaps she was angry but when she wrapped her arms around him and started to cry he knew better. He knew what he had to do. He'd learned something today. Blind people need their independence more than sighted people but that loved ones found it difficult to let them go.

"Penny, there are things we can't change in life and we have to meet those circumstances head-on. Besides, you'll have your hands full with your studies and my lecture materials. I just want to free you from…"

"Free me? Free me from what? You're not an obligation to me. You're not some task or chore, you're my everything and I don't want you pulling away from me, putting things in your damned sets – this is a 'Penny set' and this set is all other things."

"I'm impressed with your argument, Penny, sets? Fascinating. You're just blossoming daily and I must say I miss seeing the look of wonder on your face at each new discovery."

Penny frowned. He was regressing back into the Sheldon who hid behind his vocabulary, his aloofness and his shyness. She couldn't allow that. She wanted him out of his shell and in her arms where he belonged.

"Cut the crap, Dr. Cooper. Are you or are you not subconsciously or consciously redefining our arrangement? Are you or are you not, consciously creating distance between us? Don't you love me anymore, Shel? I need you, baby. Please don't do this…"

"I – I want you to be able to experience everything that life at the University has to offer, both academically and socially. I won't have you fettered to me, doing tasks that I can and should be able to do on my own. I'm not creating distance, Penny, I'm creating…time and space for us. Think it through, Penny, and you'll see I'm right."

* * *

><p>Penny sighed as Sheldon ran his fingers down her naked back and then made circles on her naked buttocks. She really should untangle herself from her beloved Moon Pie and do something about dinner but she just snuggled closer to his chest and sighed again. Dinner could wait. This was paradise.<p>

She'd added a few new words to her Lexicon (her new word for the day. Lexicon: glossary or word list) of Climax Utterances.

"Shel, I was going to cook you a big meal and celebrate my first day in Academia but you decided to ravage and pillage my pussy instead and now I'm just too damned comfortable to do it. Pizza?"

"Later. I know a place that delivers well past midnight." His fingers wandered down from her ass to her inner thighs and started stroking her.

"Well, pizza for breakfast sounds good."

A/N: Aisha appears in the next chapter. Got kinda wrapped up with this scene. The asshole from the Orientation won't take no from Penny. Someone from Sheldon's past freaks him out and Penny leaerns more about the younger Sheldon than she imagine..


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: Still conventioning through Friday. Wrote this during boring seminar. Down to 117 hitson the last chapter. Sad but i will finish this because I don't ever quit.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 19<p>

You could cut the tension in the apartment the morning of Sheldon's procedure with a butter knife. Penny knew he hadn't slept well and neither had she. The operation today would either mend their world or bring it crashing down around them. She desperately wanted her Moon Pie to be able to see her, hell, see anything.

Sheldon seemed immune to her concerns but she knew from the sleeplessness that he was scared. _Who wouldn't be afraid? She was afraid for him because she knew, despite his 'acceptance', that he felt less somehow because of his blindness. Try as she might, she couldn't help him other than to hold his hand and cry silently with him._

"Sheldon, you are the most important man in the world to me and whatever happens today, good or bad, we're in it together, okay? I meant what I said, my love. 'Until death do us part'."

They kept Sheldon overnight and the next morning the doctor released him and gave Penny a list of restrictions to be followed _to the letter_, starting with 'a quiet environment' and bed rest for at least a week.

The drive back to Pasadena was marred only by Sheldon's quiet. She didn't know if 'quiet Sheldon' meant he was worried or just tired. Or thinking.

"Sheldon! Quit picking at the bandage. You only need to wear it for 3 days and then you're back to eye patches. Don't worry, sweetie, those aviators you wear hide them."

"It itches, Penny, and it's hard not to scratch."

"Suck it up, Sheldor. The time will fly."

It did. When the bandages were removed and the doctor had spent some time peering into Sheldon's eyes saying 'mmmhmmmm' a lot, Penny finally couldn't stand it any longer.

"How's it look? Is it healing okay?" She read up extensively about his procedure and knew more than Sheldon did about it.

"Yes. Looking good, Dr. Cooper. Now, Ms. Drummond, in a few months, certainly before Christmas, we'll consider the corneal transplant. The retina has fully attached and I see no signs of swelling or infection or bubbling. It's a perfect reattachment. The procedure was a success!"

The trip back was so different. They laughed and Sheldon did his impression of the doctor he'd never seen and was surprising accurate in some of his facial expressions.

"Ms. Drummond, there is a semi-formal faculty mixer this Saturday evening." He tried sounding pompous but couldn't pull it off when she laughed. "Will you be my date, Penny?"

'_My God! He's nervous? Why?'_

"I'd love to, Dr. Cooper. And then perhaps, afterwards, you might drop by my place and allow me to show my appreciation?" She already had a dress and shoes and all she needed was Sheldon in that dark gray pinstriped suit with that almost-black shirt and maroon tie. Mmmm. They wouldn't stay long if she had her way.

"Perhaps." They grinned at each other since 'appreciation' was their code word for making love.

* * *

><p>Dr. Gabelhauser must have had his Sheldar on because within seconds of their arrival he was pumping Sheldon's hand and saying how glad he was to have him back. He couldn't see her, of course, but the smile on Penny's face would have launched a thousand ships just as Helen of Troy's supposedly did.<p>

When Sheldon's boss led them over to a group of people, Penny felt a sudden chill and shivered. "Cold, Penny? Perhaps you should have worn the shawl after all." He put his arm around her bare shoulders and gently pulled her against him. "I'll warm you up later, m'lady," he whispered and she felt a warm pulse spread from her loins to her face. "You just did, stud. Boy, are you going to get appreciated tonight!"

The private tête-à-tête was interrupted by an accented voice asking, almost whispering, "Sheldon? Sheldon Cooper? Is it really you, Liebchen?"

Penny looked up in concern when she felt a tremor pass through Sheldon. "Baby, are you sick? Dizzy?" Maybe it was too soon for him to be on his feet so long.

Penny watched as his pale face lost all its color when a tall blonde about Sheldon's age came forward and placed a gentle hand on his cheek. "Mein Gott! It _is _you!" Sheldon flinched and took a step back, wrapping his arm even more tightly around Penny as if protecting her.

"Sheldon? Do you know this woman?" She knew Sheldon and his reaction was not something she'd ever seen before. He was afraid!

"Unfortunately, Penny, I do, although it has been more than ten years since I've spoken to her. Penny, this is Fraulein Doktor Freya von Marburg. She was my…my girlfriend when I was in Germany. Freya, this is Ms. Penny Drummond, my fiance and the best thing that has ever happened to me."

"Oh, Sheldonnnnn, I vas _so_ much more than a girlfriend. I vas your teacher und you had so much to learn, nein? Ve must get together, Ms. Drummond, and, how do you say it, compare experiences. There is much I could tell you about my Sheldon and his preferences."

Penny heard Sheldon's breath hitch. This was the Bitch from Germany who'd hurt her beloved Moon Pie. "I don't think so. I've no desire to engage in salacious (her word for the day) gossip nor do I have the time. I'm quite satisfied with _**MY**_ fiance's performance in _all_ the important areas."

Although several inches taller, it was obvious to those eavesdropping on the conversation who of the two was the most dangerous…the short one from Nebraska.

Dr. Gabelhauser chose that moment to introduce Freya to the attendees. Sheldon leaned down and whispered, "You could teach her a few things, Penny, about loving instead of humiliating, about being supportive instead of domineering. Let's go home, Penny. I feel in a very appreciative mood."

Freya watched as the tall well-dressed man and his short blonde companion made their way out of the library events center and out into the darkened parking lot. Her smile was cold and cruel. She was not done with Sheldon Cooper. No one walked away from her until she was finished with them. They usually crawled.

As for his blonde trollop – well, accidents do happen.

* * *

><p>THIS SECTION IS 'M'! DON'T LIKE IT? DON'T READ IT. TOO YOUNG, SKIP TO THE NEXT PAGE BREAK.<p>

Reparata*********************

Sheldon pins Penny against their car, his body somehow between her legs. She can feel his arousal pushing against her core and she suddenly unsure what's going on. She's not against having wild spontaneous sex in the CalTech faculty parking lot but there's more to it than that.

His face is buried in her hair and one hand sweeps her hair aside giving his lips access to the place on her neck that makes her knees weak. Sheldon is a strange combination of demanding and gentle and she's hot and wet and so ready for whatever he has in mind.

"Penny, that woman," he slides his lips along her jawbone until he's sucking on the spot below her ear that drives her mad, "is a pimple," his open mouth slides down until he's nipping at her collar bone and running his tongue along its length, "on the ass of humanity."

Penny starts to giggle until Sheldon slips a hand up under her skirt and begins stroking her through the damp material of her thong and then she whimpers his name and draws up her thigh and loops her ankle behind his leg, giving him full access to do whatever he wants.

"Fuck me, lover, right here, right now. Oh, God, Sheldon, I want you in me now, please, please, Shel…"

Penny has his belt undone in seconds and his trousers and boxers pooled around his ankles. He pulls down her thong and it ends up torn, looped around her ankle when he lifts her up and then guides his cock into her hot, wet pussy. She wraps her legs around his waist, crossing her ankles behind him and her arms around his neck and attacks his ear with her lips, muttering nonsense syllables as he buries himself again and again in her tight warmth. When he presses on her clit with his thumb she begins to convulse around him as her orgasm takes her. Sheldon follows in seconds and they collapse across the hood of the car.

"Wow, Dr. Cooper, who knew…"

* * *

><p>Once home and lying together, still damp from their shower together, they talk – he talks, she listens – about Germany and 22 year-old Freya von Marburg, the Vagina Odentata (she'll have to look that one up), and 16 year-old Sheldon Cooper from Galveston, Texas. They make love again, slowly and gently, and fall asleep just as the sun begins to lighten the eastern sky.<p>

Sheldon awakens at 8:30am and lets Penny sleep. He makes coffee and waits for a decent hour before calling Howard and checking on the progress of the project (almost completed) and inviting him and Raj to dinner. Sheldon has not quite forgiven the two of them for the Betrayal in the Artic but they are his friends and Raj has especially become important to him since the Duel.

Penny shambles from the bedroom to the kitchen and pours herself a cup of coffee and then plops down beside Sheldon on the couch. She's naked but figures it doesn't matter since it's just the two of them and she was too groggy to even think about something as complicated as clothing.

He rests his hand on her thigh and whispers, like it's a secret, "Penny, you're naked."

"Yep," she replies, popping the 'P' and smiling. The smile fades when she remembers some of the things he told her about Germany and the cruel slut they ran into last night.

"Shel, thank you for last night. It took a lot of courage to tell me about…about Germany." She grabbed his wrist and pulled it over her shoulders and then leaned over and rested her head in his lap. His fingers combed through her hair, massaging her scalp and Penny purred in pleasure. "I love you, Dr. Cooper."

"I know, Penny." She soon drifted back to sleep, a doze, really, and Sheldon continued his ministrations. It was very domestic and felt right. _This is how it should have been in Germany._

But it wasn't.

* * *

><p>Howard called from the parking lot and said that he and Raj had a 'surprise' for Sheldon and Penny told them to come up. She dashed into their bedroom and dressed in casual clothes taking the time to hang up the clothes they'd torn off the previous evening in their hot desire for each other.<p>

The episode in the parking lot was like a porn movie scene and Penny could hardly believe that Sheldon S. Cooper, PhD, had fucked her into senselessness on the hood of their car. No one would believe it but she knew it happened. Her torn thong was proof. She had loved every second of the brief encounter but when they each showed their 'appreciation', well, it was wonderful.

"…and so, Sheldon, all you have to do to advance the line on the web page is to hit the left button on the built-in mouse. To page down, hit the right button. You're right handed so I made all the non-reading functions on the left."

"Howard, if they gave PhD's for creative tinkering and mechanical genius, you'd have at least two. I don't know how I can ever thank you. It opens up the World Wide Web to so many visually handicapped…"

Howard is so startled by the praise that he has tears in his eyes. He looks at Penny who's just smiling and nodding her own agreement. Raj looks on, not certain if this Sheldon is not perhaps a cyborg or pod-person while the real Sheldon Cooper is moldering away under his bed.

"Howard, you _must_ patent this. If you are short of funds, I'll loan you whatever you need. Imagine, Penny, we've seen the first demonstration of the Walowitz Braille Web Reader," he looks at Howard apologetically, "but you can call it whatever you think is appropriate, Howard. After all, it's your invention. And it's so light and comfortable and the Braille 'bumps' are perfectly aligned and the perfect size. Excelsior, Howard!"

A tear ran down Howard's cheek. Excelsior was Sheldon's highest degree of praise and he suddenly felt like such a shit for helping Leonard sabotage the Arctic data. He should have stood beside his friend and not stabbed him in the back. But Sheldon, well, Excelsior meant forgiveness in Sheldonese.

While Sheldon took the daily call from Missy, Penny fed Howard and Raj brisket and honey-glazed roasted new potatoes. "Do you think Sheldon will like it, Howie? It's the first time I've tried something so out of my league…"

"My Ma needs to taste this. It's incredible, Penny. Your first try? Please, please, teach Bernadette your secret recipe?"

Raj was all smiles. He'd received a letter from Aisha that she was having difficulty with gaining an entry visa into the States but was waiting on her lawyer to petition the embassy again. Soon he would not be alone and he hoped Penny would be a friend to his Aisha.

* * *

><p>"Penny, Raj's girlfriend is planning on coming over on a tourist visa and then try and get into school here so she can stay. Do you think you might talk to her, help her adjust a bit. I think Raj's afraid she'll miss her friends and family and want to return to India." Raj's face took on a sad countenance and Penny had no choice but to agree. Dysfunctional though they were, they were Sheldon's friends and hers, too.<p>

"Of course." Later that night she told Sheldon about Aisha and the difficulties she was incurring and wondered if there was anything they could do to help.

Sheldon pressed his Vox-watch and listened to the time. He pressed another button and said, "Call Forrest. Cut through red tape."

"Honey, I didn't know it was a recording device, too! I just thought it was a cool way for you to know the time and weather. Um, you still have her number?" She felt a pang of jealousy and insecurity.

"Yeah. I don't know how to delete it so it's still on the contact list of my cell."

"Good." She didn't mean 'good' that he still had the number but rather 'good' as in 'he couldn't get rid of it'. She always felt 'less' standing next to the beautiful model/NSA Agent, especially when she saw Alex checking out her Moon Pie.

* * *

><p>It took a bit of negotiating but Aisha would be on a flight to New York and then to Los Angeles within 24 hours. The only thing Sheldon had to do in return was spend a few days working with the Troll ('Sorry, Dr. Cooper, but I really don't like Dr. Hofstadter) at the place they can't speak about – ever. "Bring Penny, Shel. I could use another girl to talk with. This place reeks of testosterone. I have to wax more often than normally and I found hair! Hair on my big toe! We'll call and a plane will be waiting for you at the usual place. Oh, same conditions apply. Talk and disappear off the face of the earth."<p>

They say their goodbyes and Sheldon chuckles. Penny looks at him with a raised eyebrow and he knows she's doing it even if he can't see it. "Alexandra has invoked her Tit-for-Tat provision and you and I must go to the-place-we-can't-speak-about in the future for a little visit. But Aisha and Raj will soon be together."

A/N: Freya stalks Sheldon, a Grad Student stalks Penny and Sheldon reacts like Sheldon. Forrest reappears for a scene or two. Oh, yeah, the elusive Aisha makes her appearance and Raj finally talks to Penny.


	20. Chapter 20

Remember – I don't believe in Unhappy endings.

FYI: I see Freya as an older Cameron Diaz or the woman who played Nicholas Cage's girlfriend in National Treasure.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 20<p>

LAX Int'l Airport

It took longer than 24 hours but as the four of them stood, sat, leaned and slouched, Raj heard the announcement that the plane bringing Aisha to him was on final approach. The dark little man positively vibrated with excitement and Penny had wisely _not_ yielded to the guys' request for Red Bull or, in Sheldon's case, Mountain Dew. It was bad enough shepherding them around the concourse and finally into the arrivals area like some damned border collie. Dosing them with stimulants was insanity.

"Y'know Moon Pie, if Raj gets married, maybe we'll get to go to India for the wedding. Wouldn't that be neat? We could see the Taj Majal, all those cool things…" Her voice trailed off as she realized the futility of 'we could see.." and how hurtful it must be for Sheldon to hear her words.

"I could pick up a copy of the _Kama Sutra_ – the illustrated version – yes, that would be enjoyable." He glided through the hurt and waggled his eyebrows suggestively at Penny.

She leaned up and whispered that they could get a copy on-line and she could provide 'hands on' body positioning. She giggled at his surprised look and kissed his cheek. "Love ya, Shel."

Howard sat back eyeballing the passing flight attendants, glad that Bernadette couldn't see him. They had hit a brief patch of ice in their relationship and were just getting their footing back and his lustful ogles would not have gone over well with the short buxom microbiologist/virologist. _She'd probably bring home Ebola and infect me._

He watched as Raj fidgeted with the bouquet of flowers he'd brought with him and wondered why he never brought flowers to Bernadette. He made a metal note to pick some up before going over to her place. Tomorrow night they were all meeting up at Sheldon and Penny's place – _Sheldon and Penny's place, who'da thought Batman would end up with Queen P and have __**their**__ place?_ – and then going out to dinner.

* * *

><p>Aisha Sanjeel was, bluntly, not what Penny had expected. Raj had walked quickly towards a slender Indian woman wearing jeans and a designer t-shirt she bet cost at least $200 and sandals. She had long shiny black hair and wore just enough makeup to look 'made up' without looking like a skank. In short, she was everything she'd hoped Raj's girlfriend would be, but never expected.<p>

'This girl is an '**_untouchable_**'? How fucked up can India be?'

The girl was hanging onto Raj and crying with happiness and Raj was almost in tears himself. Apparently she'd given up hope of ever getting to the States until suddenly she was granted a resident visa and put on a plane. Alexis Forrest had long arms, indeed.

Howard looked on with a big smile on his face. He glanced at Penny and knew his facial expression matched hers. Delighted disappointment. He had expected someone so much less than Aisha appeared to be and he was happy for his friend. _'Oh my God! It's happening! I'm – I'm growing up!'_

Raj led the girl over to his friends and introduced her as 'the future Mrs. Aisha Koothrapalli, mother of a dynasty'. "Aisha, these are my best friends, Penny and Sheldon and my wingman, Howard. Bernadette couldn't get free. Something about amoebic dysentery cultures that she needed to baby sit."

Aisha spoke better English than Raj since she was a call-center representative, one of those 'Hello, my name is Gigi…' people who interrupted dinner or your favorite show to sell you something.

Aisha whispered something to Raj and Penny knew from the sudden sad look on his face that she'd asked about Sheldon. Penny started to explain about his sight when Sheldon said something in Hindi that shocked Raj and sent Aisha into a giggle fit. Whatever he said broke the ice and soon everyone was talking.

By the time they got her luggage (only one bag) and left the arrivals terminal, Penny and Aisha were planning a shopping trip to pick up 'essentials' while Raj just smiled and laughed and agreed with everything she said, even handing over his treasured American Express Gold Card.

* * *

><p>Next morning-CalTech<p>

Freya von Marburg was waiting for Sheldon outside his office. She would have preferred waiting in his office as opposed to the corridor but the office was securely locked. Her initial intentions were to beg his forgiveness, have sex on his office desk and then inform his fiance of their actions by sending her a video from her camera phone but when Penny showed up hand in hand with Sheldon she was unprepared.

"Ms. von Marburg, this is a surprise. I wasn't aware of a meeting on Dr. Cooper's schedule. He has classes all morning but perhaps we can squeeze you in around, say, 3:45 for 15 minutes?" She consulted her iPad and said, "Um, no, that won't work. He has a conference call but maybe tomorrow?"

"Miss Drooomond, it is _Doktor_ von Marburg, and I just wanted to see if Sheldon was free for lunch." She addressed Sheldon. "Are you, Liebchen? We could have lunch in my suite at the hotel and…catch up."

"Doctor von Marburg, it's Drummond. The 'U' is short, like in 'you skanky cun – "

"Penny! Language! Lunch is not on my agenda with you today or any other day. My schedule is full as, I believe, is yours. Now if there's nothing else, please run along and prepare for your lecture series. There's a good little Nazi…"

Penny unlocked the door and led Sheldon into the new office suite and slammed the door in Freya's shocked and angry face. Muttering curses and dire predictions, she stormed off down the corridor to the office assigned to her for the lecture series.

Penny turned around to face the music. She had almost lost her temper with the blonde German bitch and had probably embarrassed Sheldon. She looked up just in time to catch the smile and then he unerringly kissed her, holding her tightly against him. She had no idea how he could home in on her lips without flubbing it up but he did and she wasn't complaining.

"Penny, please don't stoop to her level. Always remember to look down your nose at her but _never _resort to profanity when dealing with her. Now, I'm unaware of any conference call on my schedule. Perhaps you could enlighten me?"

"I made it up. I didn't want you spending one second of your time alone with her. I'm sorry."

"I'm not. Now that she's been dealt with, perhaps we can review my schedule and plan our day?"

* * *

><p>But Freya von Marburg had not been dealt with. She had already identified several possible 'assets' for her mission and saw one of them in the cafeteria sitting alone. Unbuttoning a few of her blouse buttons, she swayed over to him and sat down.<p>

Penny and Sheldon were sitting in the faculty cafeteria and Penny saw Freya von Marburg talking with the asshole who'd insulted Sheldon and hit on her. _'Maybe she can screw him up instead of Sheldon. If she's busy with 'Mr. Universal Asshole' she won't have time to hassle my Moon Pie.'_

"I have been watching you watching me. We are both adults. I know what you want and I'll give it to you gladly in exchange for a small service…" Freya said.

When she got up to leave, they'd exchanged cell numbers. 'He' was the 'Greek Adonis' from Penny's orientation session. His pride had been stung and he wanted to get even…and if he managed to bed her _and_ the older blonde professor, all the better.

Freya's plan was simple. Her boytoy would call Penny's cell phone and leave a message about being ashamed of considering Penny's suggestion that they hook up'. Simple planting of seeds in Sheldon's insecure mind.

As an 'exchange professor', she used her privileges to mine the student/faculty database and get Penny's cell number. She would drive a wedge between Sheldon and his fiance and then she'd swoop in and 'put him back together' after Penny's 'betrayal' was discovered.

* * *

><p>Sheldon always set an example for his students and so he routinely left his cell phone in his office (as did Penny after a lengthy explanation). 'Adonis' had bribed a janitor and had a master key and went in and put Penny's phone on the charger where Sheldon's normally rested and Sheldon's on Penny's desk. Since the phones were identical, no one would realize the switch and the damage would be done.<p>

When Penny and Sheldon returned from class they packed up their stuff and went home early. Tonight was the dinner for Raj and Aisha and both were looking forward to a fun-filled and relaxing evening with friends but first Penny and Bernadette were taking Aisha shopping.

Penny put 'her' cell phone in her purse and handed 'his' to him. She always smiled when Sheldon lectured her on putting her cell on the charger and she always said 'yes, dear' and kissed him. Today was no exception.

* * *

><p>The three young women had left earlier leaving Sheldon alone with his thoughts and his Wolowitz Braille Reader. He and Howard had agreed to enter into a business relationship with Sheldon being the 'money man' and Howard and his cousin, also named Howard and a lawyer, running things.<p>

Sheldon was a creature of habit and he always checked his cell phone for voice messages. He was in 'his spot' and mulling over some arcane formulae he'd stumbled on while surfing the internet and hit his voicemail playback.

'_Hey, beautiful, um, look, ah, I – I can't do it – I can't meet you. He's blind, Penny, and I know you said you're only with him because of his money and influence - but he's blind and I just can't bring myself to cheat on a blind guy like that. The sex was great but I guess I'm just not desperate enough to compromise my morals. Sorry. Look me up when you're done with Dr. Cooper and maybe…hell, I got to go. Bye, Penny.'_

Sheldon listened to the playback four times and would have listened to it again and again but Howard and Raj stopped by to keep him company while the 'women folk pillaged' the shops at the mall.

"Yo-yo-yo, Sheldor…'sup buddaaaaay?' Raj greeted Sheldon with what he thought was American colloquialisms. Sheldon didn't respond. He just sat on his spot, hunched over like he'd been punched in the stomach repeatedly.

"Afternoon, Sheldon. Raj and I came over to keep you company while the girls are – " Howard stopped when he saw the tears on Sheldon's face trickling down from beneath his Aviators. He just kept pushing the playback button on his cell phone and listening. It was on speaker and the two friends heard the voicemail.

Howard listened and then told Raj 'keep an eye on him' and went into the hallway and called Bernadette.

"_Hey, Howie, 'sup, boyfriend?"_

"Bernadette, bring Aisha and Penny to Sheldon's, right away. Something's happened. He's…he's like 'old Sheldon'. I don't want to leave him alone so hurry back."

'_But Howie, we just go here! What's – " _He cut Bernadette off and said curly to 'get back to Sheldon's. I don't think we're doing dinner tonight.'

He disconnected the call and went back into the apartment. By now, Raj was in tears, too. If Penny would do this to a nice guy like Sheldon, Aisha would do it in a heartbeat to Raj. The wedding was off.


	21. Chapter 21

One or two more chapters to go.

* * *

><p>Chapter 21<p>

It was a good thing that Sheldon Cooper had never been in Bernadette's car. Penny would have been peeling him off the headliner. First, the car was littered with fast food containers, empty water bottles, scraps of post-its with notes scrawled on them and what she hoped were empty Petrie dishes.

And then there was the basic issue of speed. Whatever Howie had said to her had lit a fire under her tail and she had dragged the two women out of the mall as fast as she could. For a little girl, she was strong. Her foot was very heavy as well.

"Bernadette, slow down! What did Howard say to you that's got your panties in a knot?" Penny was in the backseat, leaning over the front seat watching the speedometer hit 40, then 50…on a very busy commercial thoroughfare.

"He said something was wrong with Sheldon and to get back there right away!"

"Step on it! You're going too slow. Faster…faster…pull over and let me drive!"

"Raj? What's wrong? Where's Sheldon?" He saw the tears and the missing Sheldon and put 2 and 2 together. He was only an engineer but he got 4.

* * *

><p>SheldonPenny apartment

He'd only been gone a minute or two at the most. What could have happened?

"Raj, where is Sheldon? And why are you crying? It's not that bad. I'm sure Penny can explain it or…where's that damned phone?"

"He went to his room. He has the phone. All he does is listen to that damning voicemail that has hurt him. Howard, if someone as sweet as Penny seems to be could do this to Sheldon, what does it mean for me and Aisha? Or you and Bernadette? I thought what they had was 'real' but now? Women are so…so…unfathomable."

Howard just shook his head. The subject was too complex to deal with at the moment. He went to Sheldon's door and knocked.

"Sheldon, it's Howard and I'm coming in," and opened the door.

"You're in my room. No one is allowed in my room. Get out, Howard. That's a strike. No, that's TWO strikes!"

Sheldon didn't look up. He was sitting on the edge of his bed (their bed; Penny had nagged him into getting a queen sized bed), folded over on his knees with Penny's cell phone against his forehead, listening to the voicemail over and over..

"Sheldon, buddy, I need to look at that cell phone for just a second and then I'll give it right back, okay? I need to do some validation studies. Something's not right here."

"Yes, Howard. You are right. Something's not right. You are in my room. No one is allowed in my room. Here, take it and go. I've heard enough to do me a lifetime. People like me don't get women like Penny. It was an anomaly, an aberation, a one-off, and now it's over."

He tossed the phone in Howard's general direction. His friend who'd never even played T-Ball made a catch worthy of a major leaguer.

"Okay, Sheldon. I'm leaving. Don't do anything rash, okay? Just stop and think. Consider it a problem and set your mind to it. I'll be back with my findings."

He walked quickly back into the living room and opened up Sheldon's laptop and entered some code and the number of the phone that had dialed Penny's and waited. "Raj, quit your sniveling. I need your help. I have a cell phone number but it's listed to CalTech, nothing more. I need a hack, buddy."

Raj, happy for something to do with his mind, shoved Howard out of the way and started entering code and soon the screen was filled with lines of code that seemed to scroll endlessly.

And then stopped and a data field was highlighted.

* * *

><p>Bernadette, bless her heart, managed to arrive at the apartment building without getting a ticket or into an accident. Penny had leaned over the backseat and pointed out every gap in the traffic and urged Bernadette to 'stomp on it…blow his damned doors off…get me home…"<p>

The car hadn't even come to a complete stop and Aisha had the door open and Penny crawled over her and out onto the sidewalk and then ran up into the building.

'_Something was wrong with Sheldon'. Could they have been any vaguer?_

The sprint up the 4 flights of stairs winded her and she fumbled with her keys when the door opened and Raj stepped outside, putting his fingers across her lips to silence her.

"We don't want Sheldon to know you're here yet until we've completed our investigation. So far it looks like you've both been maliciously punked but we've not finished with it yet. Please, Penny, sit and don't speak. We must know the truth before you see him," he whispered and then pointed to the stairway landing and went back inside.

Inside, Howard was on the phone with Dr. Eric Gabelhauser, their boss and a willing participant in what he'd mentally dubbed 'Experiment in Payback'. He held off Raj's questions with a hand held in the universal 'stop' sign.

"Okay, then you are in agreement. This is beyond the pale and certainly warrants extreme retribution. To recap, you will handle the expulsion and the cancelation of Dr. Von Marburg's lecture series immediately. We…we'll pick up the pieces and hope Sheldon can pull it together. It was a shitty thing to do, Dr. Gabelhauser, not just because he's blind."

He hung up the phone and Raj looked at his friend with 'new eyes'.

"Howard, I leave you alone for 2 minutes and you've organized a counterstrike of such magnitude? Surely Sheldon is not the only Mad Genius in town. You've enlisted the Department Chairman? Evil, Howard, purely evil but so warranted."

"He's my friend. They both are. And it seems that there are surveillance cameras in the office…"

"Where is he? I've waited long enough out there, Raj. Where is Sheldon?" She threw open the door and stalked in, looking every inch the Queen P of Age of Conan.

Raj intercepted her and she almost punched him.

"Penny, wait! You must know what has 'gone down' before approaching your paramour. That evil woman from Germany has engaged in unprofessional behavior and she has suborned a student to aid her. It is being taken care of by my Mad Genius friend but you must sit and be quiet whilst Howard tells you all that has happened and will happen."

* * *

><p>Bernadette and Aisha walked into the apartment, huffing and puffing. Bernadette immediately demanded an explanation while Aisha simply walked over to Raj and hugged him. America was a strange land with strange people. She wasn't sure if leaving India was a good idea after all.<p>

* * *

><p>Penny stared at a spot on the carpet where she'd once spilled grape juice and forgotten about it while Howard and Raj filled her in on what had happened. She wondered how Sheldon could be so quick to believe the message until Howard played it back. Now she understood. The caller had played to his weaknesses and nailed the whole thing tight with the blind crap.<p>

Penny looked at Howard with tears in her eyes when he explained that the 'perp' had been caught on a security camera that automatically came on when either of their access codes were not used to unlock the door. Raj had hacked the university database and found out to whom the cell phone had been assigned.

Dr. Gabelhauser would do the rest. The student had been identified from the security footage and facial recognition software and the cell phone was registered to Dr. Freya von Marburg, visiting professor and lecturer – well, soon to be 'former' visiting professor and lecturer.

"Where do they live? Can you find out? I need to talk to them. I want to ask him 'why'. I already know why the Nazi Bitch put him up to it. She and Shel have history and she's trying to bust us up. Find out where they live, please? Do it for me."

Penny stood and thanked Howard and Raj and nodded to Bernadette and Aisha. "Aisha, we'll hit the malls tomorrow when I'm in a better mood. Right now I have to explain all this to Sheldon and pray he believes me."

* * *

><p>Penny knocked lightly on their bedroom door and then went in and closed the door behind her. It was bright and sunny in the room and she could see Sheldon's face and the wet tear tracks when he looked up at the doorway and her heart broke for him.<p>

Penny crossed the room and knelt before Sheldon, her hands on his shoulders and her forehead resting against his. She could feel the hitch in his breath as he tried to control his emotions.

"Sheldon, we were punked. Raj and Howard found out who switched our cell phones and why. It was the guy I blew off at faculty orientation. Freya-Slut hooked up with him and he used her cell to call my cell and leave that horrid voicemail. He broke into our office and switched phones while we were in class. It was all a lie, honey. Just a horrible lie to break us up so that woman could get her claws into you."

Sheldon grabbed Penny by the hips and leaned back onto the bed, pulling her with him so that she was laying full length against him. He nuzzled her neck and sniffed back tears.

"This is a social situation with which I have no basis or experience to aid in understandong. I thought it was true, Penny, and I'm sorry for not trusting you but he said things that I knew were true in the past. I'm sorry for doubting you for even one millisecond."

"I love you, Sheldon Lee Cooper and…and I want to be your wife. Will you marry me, Shel? Will you be my husband and the father of our children? Will you come visit me at the California Women's Correctional Center on 'conjugal visit' weekends?"

"Yes, Penny, yes! Wait! Visit you _where_?"

"I'm going to be going to jail, Moon Pie, because I'm going to castrate that sonofabitch and then I'm going to skin that scrawny blonde bitch and roll her in salt and laugh. Maybe I could plead insanity because I'm really crazy about you, Doctor."

* * *

><p>AN: Sorry for the brevity but I had issues with my Dell laptop hunk 'o junk and had to get my neighbor to transfer files to my new laptop and I got to go out of town and do a convention again. Viva Las Vegas! And no, I'm not a hooker.


	22. Chapter 22

Short but my main man is coming home from NTC and well, some things are more important. Enjoy. This chapter is all about revenge…

Chapter 22

Last time: _Maybe I could plead insanity because I'm really crazy about you, Doctor._

He stared at the beautiful blonde in his arms, catching just the shadows between sunlight and her face. At that moment he'd have given away the last year of his life to be able to see her face just as it was but all he could see were varying shades of blackness.

"I don't think the sanitary conditions of a 'conjugal visit trailer' would allow me to become aroused, unless they permitted me to bring own sheets and – "

She cut him off with a kiss and laughed. She knew he was kidding and trying to make her feel better. He always did.

"Penny, did you really mean what you said or was it just because of the emotional roller coaster you were on. I mean, I understand that overly-emotional people tend to go 'off the deep end' when confronted with an emotionally charged moment and – Ouch!"

"If you say the word 'emotion' or any of its derivatives (her word for the day: Derivative – copied, lacking originality, imitative), I'll do worse than that! Of course I meant it, dumbass. Look, we almost had 'us' torn up and thrown away by outside forces and I realize that all the fear I have of 'us' ending in divorce or worse is holding me back from being incredibly happy so…yep, I'm going to drag you to the altar and you can make an honest woman out of me."

"Dr. and Mrs. Sheldon L. Cooper…I like that. But someday I'd like it to be 'Dr. and Dr. Sheldon L. Cooper'."

"Sheldon, what are you saying?" She had a sudden image of Sheldon and a blonde registering at a fancy European hotel (to receive the Nobel Prize) as 'Dr. & Dr. Sheldon Cooper'. It wasn't a pleasant image since the blonde wasn't her.

"You have so-called 'street smarts' and I think you should go into counseling and so, even though I think it's all a bunch of 'junk science' and associated crap, I do see the benefit you bring to others such as myself and so…you should wade into that Freudian Swamp called – ugh – Psychology. I know you will be quite successful and obtain a PhD much sooner than you might expect."

"Ugh. Nice image you paint there, Shel. Why are you so certain I can help other people?" She liked the idea although she didn't think she was smart enough to ever be 'Dr. Penelope Drummond Cooper, PhD' but God, it sounded so wonderful.

"Penny, look at me and how far you've pulled me into the social world. If you can help _me_, you can help anyone. I believe in you, Queen P. Why can't you believe in yourself?"

* * *

><p>When the couple finally emerged from their bedroom, Penny swept her eyes across her friends who were all looking very solemn.<p>

In a somber and uncharacteristic tone, Penny calmly said that she needed some time alone to sort things out. Sheldon simply nodded, not wanting to ruin the moment for Penny.

"Howard, did you get me that address? And Raj? Could you be a real sweetie and find my softball bat in my old room and bring it out to me? Thanks, sweetie."

Howard had scribbled the address on a note card and looked over at Sheldon and asked, "Sheldon, considering how Penny is, Nebraska and all that Junior Rodeo Cowgirl stuff, do you _really_ want her to have this asshole's address?"

"It's her decision, Howard, not mine. I've already agreed to conjugal visits at the California Women's Correctional Center for purposes of coitus and, I might add, to ensure that her jailhouse 'tatts' are tasteful and properly done. Neither of us desires a repeat of 'SOUP'." Penny giggled and squeezed his ribs.

That much was true and anyone who knew Sheldon's twitches and inability to lie would have to believe him. His embellishments weren't part of the conditions of the question asked so - no twitches.

"Well, okay then. On your heads be it. But Penny, at least take Bernadette and Aisha with you for backup. If this butthole is as slimy as he has to be to do this to you two, I'd feel better if you had backup, wouldn't you, Sheldon?"

"I trust Penny's judgment in matters I have no experience with. Of course I would feel better, but it isn't necessary that _I_ feel better, just that she feels safe." He looked over at her, tucked as she was under his arm and said, "I would feel better but I do trust your judgment. Just remember to ask for clean sheets when I visit the 'conjugal trailer'."

"I promise, Moon Pie. Raj, what's taking you so long in there?" If it were Howard in there, she'd worry about her underwear drawer being rifled for souvenirs, but this was sweet Rajeesh Koothrapalli, not the Wolowitz.

"Penelope, if I make a suggestion?" Aisha and Bernadette and Penny were soon laughing and plotting and the two Americans knew that the Indian girl of the 'untouchable' caste would fit right in with their little dysfunctional social group. Neither of them felt the least bit 'dirty' after hugging the young woman when they heard her ideas.

* * *

><p>Aisha knocked at the door and waited. She could tell when then man inside the student apartment came to the door because the light from the peephole vanished.<p>

The door opened and 'Adonis' stood there in boxer shorts and a wife beater t-shirt and leered down at her. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

Aisha smiled and giggled and then shot him in the face with pepper spray.

Penny stepped in front of her and smacked the young man in the balls with her softball bat, (pulling the swing at the last moment) and Bernadette slapped a piece of duct tape over his mouth and then poured a bottle of water across his eyes to clear out the pepper spray.

He started to flail about but Penny quickly hog-tied him using cable ties she found in their apartment. The three women donned pairs of Sheldon's surgical gloves and surgical masks and then picked him up and dumped him face down on his bed, his wrists behind his back secured with cable ties and his feet likewise restrained.

"Scissors." Penny said and held out her hand and Bernadette handed them to her. Penny slipped the sharp scissors under the waistband of the boxes and cut them off him. She did the same with the t-shirt, ignoring the muffled protests of their target.

Penny and Aisha rolled him over on his back and Bernadette laughed softly. "It looks like someone has been using steroids." He got red in the face and started yelling but the duct tape muffled everything.

"Tongs," said Penny and Bernadette slapped them into her hand like a nurse in an operating room.

Penny used the tongs to lift and hold his small cock up and away from his ball sac. "Hmph. Sweetie, you messed with the wrong man when you tried screwing over my guy but I suppose Freya let you put this pathetic wee little thing in her as payment. Sad. I hope you enjoyed it because," her eyes narrowed and she hissed, "it's never, ever, going to happen again. Butcher knife." She held out her hand and Bernadette tried to keep from laughing but put the knife in Penny's hand but then let the laugh burst out as did the other two.

Adonis had fainted.

* * *

><p>He didn't know how long he'd been unconscious but when he awoke, he was in a bathtub filled with ice water and there was a note saying 'One word to the cops and we'll see you on YouTube!' and beside it was a bloody…<p>

He screamed and screamed and finally stood up. The ice water he was soaking in contained vegetable dye…red vegetable dye…blood red vegetable dye. It would be months before it all wore off.

* * *

><p>Bernadette drove slowly back to Penny's apartment. The three vigilantes had been laughing, drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade, and retelling their favorite parts of the Vendetta. "Did you see the look on his face when Penny said 'Butcher Knife'? My god I thought he was going to have a stroke!"<p>

"Aisha, putting that bratwurst covered in ketchup beside the tub…sheer genius! Although it was way too big…"

"I still think I should have castrated the bastard. He hurt Sheldon so bad. Well, next we go for Freya. Aisha, tell me again what the ancient rajas used to do to unfaithful women? Anyone know where we can get a cobra at this hour?"

They never found a cobra and it wouldn't have mattered much if they had. Freya von Marburg had heard what had happened to her boytoy and had left that same night for Germany leaving behind her reputation and professional future.


	23. Chapter 23

Short but sweet.

Chapter 23

Between transcribing Sheldon's lecture notes onto his laptop and creating 'Walowitz Braille Reader notes', and making slide presentations, going to her freshman classes, and spending as much quality time with Sheldon as she could, Penny's plate was full and she couldn't be happier.

Raj and Howard were busy with their own lives and Sheldon was off in theoretical physics land so she took a deep breath and opened up a file on her laptop entitled 'Wedding' and started updating her Task list.

Her guest list included some people of whom Sheldon would definitely not approve: his brother and mother. Of course, Missy and MeeMaw are on the approved listing. Penny had a backup plan if his grandmother could not attend because of health: they'd move the wedding to Texas.

The couple had not discussed who the best man would be yet and she knew that Sheldon would want Leonard even though she and Leonard had 'history'. He still considered Leonard his 'best friend' although Howard was fast approaching b/f status but he couldn't pick Howard and leave Raj in the lurch so it was probably going to be Leonard.

Speaking of Rajeesh, he and Aisha were past the mute point. Just with Aisha though. He still couldn't speak to Penny or Bernadette without alcohol but Aisha saw this as a 'sign from the Gods' that they were soul mates. Penny and Bernadette thought it was 'cute'. Sheldon thought it was just a chemical imbalance.

Penny didn't like Sheldon's choice of Leonard as his Best Man one bit but it was Sheldon's choice – one of the few he had, given the scope and detail of Penny's plan. Her choice of Maid of Honor was obviously Missy. Bernadette was just too busy and Amy was…too anal to suit Penny and besides, there was the whole Amy/Sheldon experience that neither Sheldon nor Penny wished to bring into their wedding. Amy was still bitter about their 'breakup' and still hitting on Penny obliquely (a large female hand cupping her shapely buttock was easily defined as 'hitting on me'), one of her words from last week and she found the word easy to work into conversations with Sheldon, obliquely, of course.

"Hey, Sweet Pea, got a sec?" Penny looked over at Sheldon, his fingers ghosting over the Braille Internet platform Howard had designed and built to his specifications. Those fingertips were so sensitive and so dexterous (another of her words meaning nimble and _boy-howdy_ were they ever).

"Hmmm?" Sheldonese for 'what now, Penny? I'm reading'.

"Who's your Best Man going to be?" She looked at him out of the corner of her eye and saw the sudden look of distaste. It wasn't 'wedding talk' he objected to. It was the decision of Best Man even though in his mind it was already decided.

She heard him sigh. It wasn't one she'd catalogued yet. It wasn't 'put upon'. It wasn't the sigh he breathed when she wrapped herself around him in her sleep. This one was new.

"Please find my phone for me. I can never remember where I left it. Perhaps you can find one that responds to voice commands like 'where the hell are you'?"

Sheldon takes the phone from Penny and states firmly 'Call Agent Alexandra Forrest'. Penny hears the call connect and Sheldon leaves it on speaker so that she can hear. After all, it's her wedding day. He's just a player in the great event but he's happy with that.

"Hello, Dr. Cooper. To what do I owe this honor?" Alex tried to sound so formal but soon breaks up in a laugh. "Hey, Shel, Penny driving you nuts with wedding stuff?"

"Alex, proper planning prevents poor performance and Penny is the ultimate planner insofar as weddings are concerned. I would like to talk with Leonard about being my Best Man. Can you arrange a call, please?"

"He's not a prisoner, Sheldon, although you'd think he was being held in Max Security the way he whines. Oh, when you talk to him, ask him about 'Angie'. She's a chemical engineer assigned to the CMCV project and they're cute together. She's tall and has red hair and thinks he's 'gifted'."

"He's avoiding my calls, texts and emails. Perhaps you could suggest he answer the damned phone when I call? Penny's wedding is just around the corner and I only have one task, other than standing up there like a dolt and parroting off the promissory verbiage of some anachronistic pagan ritual that – "

"Sheldon Cooper! It's not every day a girl marries the guy of her dreams. You _will_ comply with your social obligations and you _will_ smile while you do so!" She sounded like her old 'roommate self' for a moment and Sheldon smiled. He missed her but not as a roommate. He was quite content with his current one. He handed Penny the phone when she made grabbing gestures.

"Hey, Alex, it's Penny. You didn't RSVP yet…can't break free of the spy life?" She liked Alex and wanted her to be at her wedding. She was one of the reasons she was getting married in the first place.

"Hey, Penny. Well, if Leonard goes, I go. Say, can he bring his new girlfriend? Got room for another one or two?"

"Sure! You can bring someone, of course. You mentioned someone when we were at the place we never mention unless we want to go down below the earth forever."

"You've been listening to your boyfriend's conspiracy theories again. Yeah, if Leonard goes, I'd like to bring a 'plus one' if that's okay."

"Sure thing. So have Leonard call Shel and work out the details. You've got the dates but the only thing different might be Sheldon's grandmother's health. If she can't travel, we go to her, okay? I've got a contingency plan in place should that eventuality (another of her words) arise."

"Listen to you! You sound like one of those nerds at CalTech. Is higher education corrupting the Nebraska farm girl?"

"Blame it on living with a genius who doesn't believe in single syllable words."

* * *

><p>"Hello, Sheldon. I'm kinda busy what with the CHMCV failing every stress test in the new configuration." He made it sound like it was Sheldon's fault. He knew that was being childish. Sheldon had shared credit for the discovery when he didn't have to and had even forced the awards committee to jointly award the Fermi Medal to the former roommates. Still…<p>

"Leonard, I am in need of your help. It will only take a day of your time unless the venue moves to Texas and I pray almost hourly that it doesn't."

"Okay, spill." For the great Sheldon Cooper to profess the need for his help was a milestone. He was all ears.

"I need my best friend to be the best man at my wedding." Blunt, to the point, totally Sheldon.

"So ask him. Look, Sheldon, it was nice to hear from you but I have test results to analyze and then there's the – "

"Leonard, I just did but maybe you missed it so I'll repeat it in a more direct and less ambiguous manner: You are my best friend. Please be my best man at my wedding."

"I can't, Sheldon." He was still stung by his loss of Penny to the tall socially-retarded mantis-man, even though he and Penny had been splitsville for months.

"'Can not' or 'will not', Leonard? Are you physically _unable_ to attend my wedding and be my best man or are you _unwilling_ to do so? I think an answer is dictated by social protocol, don't you?"

"Will not. I just find it too painful to see her marry such a…"

"Thank you for your honesty. Be well, Leonard. I hope you're as honest with the tall redhead as you were with me. Perhaps you can avoid the destruction of yet another relationship because of your uncontrollable insecurities. Penny was _never_ yours. She is not some _thing_ you own. She is someone you love and cherish and hope that you never awaken from the wonderful dream you're having."

He hung up the phone, totally disgusted with Leonard Hofstadter. He'd burned that bridge, torn down the end dams and salted the earth. He sighed wondering if Penny would be angry with him.

She wasn't. Penny had been eavesdropping on the conversation when she heard Leonard say he couldn't be Sheldon's best man.

Her happy mood darkened and she once again regretted ever allowing Leonard to touch her, be in the same room with her, the same state, the same…and then she heard Sheldon's beautiful description of her and their relationship and everything got better and brighter.

Penny walked into the room, glad for once that he couldn't see her tears, even if they weren't tears of sadness. He would feel immediately guilty even after she told him they were 'happy tears'.

"Hey, lover. I – I heard Leonard turn you down. It's okay. I'd rather not have him there if it means sullying our union with his presence." 'Sully' was one of her newest words and she'd never quite found a use for it until now.

"I couldn't agree with you more. I suppose…can one have two Best Men at a wedding? I mean, I have no idea of social convention."

"How about just one Best Man – the groom?" Her lips were against his ear and her whispered words went right to his groin – just as she intended.


	24. Chapter 24

In Pensacola today working a Sports Injury Conference. Might get 800 words or so out of it. HE is mightily p/o'ed at me but hey, a girl's got to eat. It's warm and muggy here and there are no snow-capped mountains to wake up to. Refreshing.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 24<p>

Alexandra Forrest slammed down the headphones and let out a strangled scream of rage and frustration. She was trapped here, in this underground facility, because she'd screwed up and now she was about at the end of her wits with Dr. Leonard _'O' woe is me'_ Hofstadter. He'd just alienated the one man who just might be able to get the project off the dime and into the air.

She sent an email to her boss asking for a special assistant for a week or two, someone who just might be able to 'motivate' the little pity-pot into thinking outside the box. She cursed her boss silently (because you never knew who might be listening) for not 'selecting' Sheldon Cooper in the first place. She thought better of it and deleted the email without sending it.

* * *

><p>Leonard sat in his apartment feeling sorry for himself. He was lonely, but only because he allowed himself to be. Considering his childhood and his deep-seated and all encompassing sense of inferiority, he felt safer 'alone' than with a crowd. He thought that if he isolated himself from the Pasadena crowd he could find a way out of the miasma of heartbreak that seemed to cling to him whenever he was around <em>her<em>. Penny. The unobtainable…_his _Nobel Prize.

He grabbed a hoodie and walked down the corridor to Ten Forward, the bar where all the 'special projects' people like him congregated and talked and plotted and wallowed in the mires of various types of self-pity.

Angie DiSantos sat at the bar and he debated joining her. He liked her and he thought maybe she saw him as something other than 'Alexandra's little troll doll'. He had heard that label bandied about before by the 'permanent staff' and it stung. Every scientist here had a handler and he never heard of them being described in such a disrespectful manner.

He sat down next to the tall redhead and ordered a beer and said hello. She was obviously a few drinks ahead of Leonard and her smile belied her watery eyes.

"Leonard, what's wrong with me? I know…too tall, red hair, right? 'Red on the head?' 'Fiery tempers?' I've heard all of them. Why – why can't any guy get past all that and see me for who I am? Sure, I'm emotional, I get mad and frustrated easily but that's part of the passion I bring to my work and – ", here she stared down at him, "that I would bring to your bed."

Leonard inhaled a swallow and spent the next few moments hacking up a lung and wiping his face and shirt front with a napkin.

"Would - would you repeat that?" He was squinting up at her in disbelief. Sheldon had Penny, Raj had some girl from a Hindu ghetto and even Wolowitz managed to get a honey like that blonde microbiologist. Maybe…

"I like you, Leonard. You're kind and you haven't once made a smart remark about how easily I blush and you even help me clean up after I lose my temper and no one has ever been so nice to me without wanting to get into my pants. Is it because you're gay?"

He inhaled a sizeable amount of beer and wheezed and coughed while she pounded his back and wiped his mouth with another napkin.

"I – I'm _**not**_ gay! I'm just…getting over someone. I loved her but she didn't love me and now she's getting married to my best friend and he asked me to be his best man and I refused. I think I need another beer."

Angelina DiSantos smiled and if Leonard had seen it, he might have reconsidered his decision to come to the bar. It was the smile of a sexual predator who had finally found her first and probably only victim. Because Angelina DiSantos was in love.

"You don't need another beer, Leonard. You need a woman who loves you and cherishes you and would do anything to make you happy."

Leonard was slow on the uptake and so he responded in his usual manner, trite and tinged with bitterness.

"Know anyone like that around here?" Their eyes met and when she slipped her hand between his legs and massaged his crotch, he was squinty-eyed and speechless.

"Yeah. Let's take this conversation back to your quarters. I've never been in one of the 'special' ones before. I'd take you back to mine but we lesser beings have roommates."

The next afternoon Leonard called Sheldon and apologized for his comments and said he'd be delighted to be Sheldon's best man and that he would be bringing his 'girlfriend' along if that was okay.

* * *

><p>In the 'Hole' where all audio and video surveillance was conducted, Alexandra whooped with joy, tossed the headphones into the air and began making arrangements for security and travel. Then she made a personal call from her quarters and arranged to meet her 'plus one' in Pasadena. She had nearly two months to find the perfect dress but began searching online the moment she had free time.<p>

* * *

><p>"Sheldon, I'm thinking about getting my hair cut for the wedding."<p>

Sheldon was sitting at his desk, 'reading' a paper written by an acquaintance at MIT arguing against the existence of monopoles when Penny interrupted him. He sighed and stopped his fingers from interpreting the bumps on the pad and waited for her to continue.

"Not a lot, Shel, just a couple of inches. I'm getting split ends." She toyed with a long strand of hair, trying to focus on the tips. She wasn't intending to cut off much, just enough to allow the hair to…

"What are split ends, Penny? The human hair is…"

"The ends of the hair become…I don't know, _split_, and they tend to snarl more easily. You know how when you run your fingers through my hair when I'm going down…"

"Penny! We agreed to keep the office unsullied with our biological…"

"Ha! I seem to remember someone sullying his desktop earlier this month. And the guest chair and his own chair and…"

But Sheldon wasn't listening. He was having a 'Eureka' moment. Split ends. Strands of hair. Strings. Strings getting 'split ends' and entangling themselves, one with another and another until…

"Penny! Quick. Get out the recorder. Split ends prove String Theory! Oh, Penny, you and your 'split ends' have proven String Theory! And no, I don't want you to cut off your beautiful hair. A trim, perhaps, but certainly not _inches._"

She laughed at the look on his face when he said 'inches'. A stranger would think she'd suggested shaving her head for the wedding. She'd let it grow to the floor if she could always see his face light up with the thrill of discovery.

Penny turned on the digital recorder and sat back and smiled as Sheldon dictated strings of equations and logically developed the mathematical proofs of 'Split End String Theory'.

_'Maybe we can honeymoon in Stockholm when my Moon Pie receives his first Nobel Prize. I'll need new shoes, boots, most likely, since it's way up north and it snows all the damned time...' _

First they had to get the past the corneal transplant problem. Their appointment next week was something she knew they both dreaded.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter25

Sheldon submitted his final draft of the 'Proof of String Theory' to his boss for approval via email. It was something he rarely did but felt it very appropriate considering how accommodating Dr. Gabelhauser had been to him and Penny. He was learning to play office politics and he brought his laser-like focus to it. He didn't need Gabelhauser's approval to publish but he wanted him to have the 'advanced copy' for his own purposes.

Penny was studying for her first set of semester finals and Sheldon gave her time and space to do so. At first he thought she was pulling away but soon enough, when she asked for his help in going over possible test questions she'd devised, he knew it was because she was terrified of falling short of some invisible mark she'd set for herself. After that, they worked out a schedule of work, study, and fun and stuck to it.

When Penny studied, Sheldon would either surf the net or he and Howard would work on the patent application for the Wolowitz Web Reader or work out bugs and glitches Sheldon had run across. There were some modifications to the surface of the reader board that Sheldon thought would make it more 'user friendly' and some of their 'discussions' grew quite heated – meaning Wolowitz moaned about the additional time delays and costs while Sheldon guilted him into making the modifications.

* * *

><p>One night a week was set aside for dinner out with their friends. Raj and Aisha were still working on getting her into school and Raj was dealing with the possibility of having their wedding in Pasadena as opposed to returning to India for the marriage.<p>

"Sheldon, my mummy and daddy are intractable with their objections, still contending that this is nothing more than a harmful infatuation and they keep sending me email addresses of 'good Indian girls' for me to consider for marriage. It is very stressful and I am feeling like I am being torn in two by elephants."

"Raj, only you can make this decision. Tradition-bound parents are a plague on us scientists. My own mother would rather I suspend my studies and return to Texas. She wants money, of course, and keeps calling Penny, asking her to 'talk some sense into her wayward son'."

He snorted a laugh. Penny's last conversation had ended with 'all you want is to get him and Missy back under your thumbs' and then 'Shel would be crazy to consider throwing away his career so that you could give Memaw's money away to your church'.

Penny even went so far as to block his mother's telephone number in her cell phone.

* * *

><p>The three couples had agreed to meet at Raj's apartment for a traditional Indian meal. Aisha wanted to impress Raj's friends with her cooking. Penny told her that the only person she had to impress was Raj and not to worry about what anyone else thought.<p>

"Sweetie, you have got to remember that this is America and we don't have 'castes'. Most people judge people on their character, not their social standing. Just be yourself and let Raj worry about his parents. Raj loves you and that's all that's important."

Penny talked to Sheldon about Indian traditions and cuisine. She wanted to make sure that he didn't freak out about eating with his fingers or sitting on the floor.

"Please, sweetie, do it for Raj. He's under enough pressure from his parents hassling him about Aisha. He doesn't need you wigging out and making a scene."

She needn't have worried. Howard's mother taught Aisha how to make brisket since it was 'that poor little Hindu boy's favorite food' since a camping trip a few years back.

Neither of them knew about the group's case of the raging munchies after eating some cookies baked by two grade school teachers who were unreconstructed hippies. All Mrs. Wolowitz knew was that Raj had raved about her brisket and that was approval and incentive enough.

So, when the Sheldon and Penny arrived for dinner, the smell that greeted them was brisket and broasted potatoes instead of curry and meat of questionable origin.

"Penny, I thought…"

"Not a word, honey, not – one – word."

* * *

><p>"I'm scared, Shel. What happens if this doesn't work? What happens to us?" She was standing between his legs as he sat on the edge of the vanity chair in the bathroom, shaving him as she did every morning.<p>

The couple were getting ready for the drive down to L.A. for Sheldon's pre-operation exam and consultation. Penny had scoured the internet for any and all information regarding cornea transplant surgery and she could quote doctors, medical journals and statistics that would leave lesser people in a daze.

"Penny, considering how far we've come since I got this way, I'd say that nothing will change…unless me being blind and a little crazy changes your feelings or intentions regarding our planned marriage. Does it? Are you having 'buyer's remorse' about 'hooking up' with me?"

He never pulled punches and that was one of the things that she both loved and hated about Sheldon. He never said anything he didn't mean but sometimes he was brutally economical in his word choices.

"No. I just want you to be able to see, that's all. I've got new nighties and a new bikini and…"

"Penny, you sleep in the nude and covering your beautiful body with flimsy cloth is totally redundant and unnecessary. It would be like having the Mona Lisa and keeping it covered with filthy canvas."

She smiled and drew the straight razor down across his cheek. Somehow in all the times she'd shaven him she'd never nicked him once, not one time.

"Quit talking, honey. I don't want to nick you. And I think that's a beautiful image you have of me. You do know that I've died my hair mousy brown and I don't bother shaving my legs or even painting my nails."

"Liar. Your legs are as smooth as marble and your hair is still blonde otherwise it would be like straw. As for your nails…you never painted them, simply putting on a coating of something to keep them from chipping or breaking. I know you, Penelope Drummond, better than you know yourself."

"Yeah…you sure do, honey," she whispered somewhat breathlessly. _'How does he do that? How does he make me so damned aroused with just a few words? Jesus, we don't have time for a quickie…tonight, though, tonight I'm going to rock his world.'_

* * *

><p>"Dr. Cooper, things are looking good. We'll schedule the transplant for after the first of the year if that's convenient. Hopefully by next Christmas the healing will be done and you'll get your sight back as a Christmas present."<p>

Penny knew from her reading that the doctor's 'estimate' was generous. There were a myriad (her newest word, myriad: countless, innumerable, many, a lot) of damned possible complications.

"I've already submitted paperwork to the National Eye Bank Registry and it's just a matter of time now. We'll call when we have a donor match."

The drive back was quiet, each lost in their own thoughts. Penny knew that Sheldon knew the same statistics that she did and she knew he was afraid although the big weenie would never admit it. She was afraid, too. There were so many things that might go wrong and she was so hopeful that he might regain at least partial sight.

"Penny, do you think we ought to postpone the wedding until I get my sight back?"

"No! Absolutely not! I've waited all this time for the right man to come along and now that I've got him, I'm going to tie him up legally and marry his skinny butt. I want you to see so bad, Shel, but not bad enough to postpone our wedding. I'm selfish and I want you and me joined together. I don't trust this new crop of grad students at all…"

It was a joke between them. Penny pretty well let it be known that 'Dr. Cooper is taken' to the incoming graduate students. A few didn't seem to get the message and once or twice she'd had to make it physically obvious that he was hers.

He had a hatred of PDAs but it was the only way she knew to stake her claim when the grad students came sniffing around her man. She couldn't drop her panties and pee a circle around him but she could kiss him, hold his hand, stroke his thigh and play footsie with him whenever one of the poachers came around.

It drove him nuts and although he knew why, he couldn't understand the _why_. "Sheldon, these bitches have itches and they see you as a way of scratching it and getting ahead academically. You just don't know how far some women will go to get ahead."

"Penny, you know I have no interest in any other woman so why bother?" Sometimes Sheldon was denser than lead.

"Because I don't like seeing you being pawed at and ogled like some…piece of meat. You're going to win the damned Nobel Prize for Physics and you're above such things."

"True, but…"

"Shut up, Sheldon. The matter is closed."

"Yes, dear." He could play the game as well as she could but sometimes it just wasn't worth the hassle.

* * *

><p>"Sheldon, I can't believe you're going to London and I have to stay here and take my damned exams! It's not fair. Could you, please, use your not inconsiderable influence and see if you can get my tests moved back a week? I mean, God, Shel, <em>LONDON<em>!"

"Penny, it's just for two days and then I'll be back. I promise I'll take you to Europe someday but I can't just call your professors and say, 'Please allow my fiance and companion to take her tests later. I'm going to London to defend my paper on Split End String Theory and I need her'."

"Why the hell not? That sounds perfectly logical to me." She wanted to go with him. She had a bad feeling about this trip and after all, he was blind and traveling alone in a foreign country…

"It's unethical, Penny, and I won't do it. There's always Stockholm, my love." He never used pet names, ever, so Penny figured it was final. Damn his ethics.

That night Penny told Sheldon she had a headache and went to bed early. He finished reviewing his notes, double-checked his paperwork and took a shower. He knew she was disappointed but they'd never gone to bed on an argument – until now.

* * *

><p>"Hold still, Sheldon. You need to – " A nick. She had watched his eyes while they <em>didn't<em> talk about last night and she lost her concentration and now he sported a Batman Band Aide near his carotid. She didn't think about the band aide. She was too upset to think. This was an omen of huge portent.

"I don't want you to go. I'll make up some excuse. Illness. Everyone knows you get sick at the drop of a hat. Your germ-o-phobia has finally proven to be well-founded and you're deathly ill."

"Penny, I'm going. I need this presentation to go well and, quite frankly, it won't if you continue to pester me with your own insecurities. Your horoscope is wrong. You are being deliberately, I believe the term is 'catty', and mean. This is so unlike you."

* * *

><p>She <em>dropped him off<em> at the departures terminal, not even bothering to get out of the car. She'd called ahead and arranged an escort for him. He took his bag from the car and waited for her to give him a goodbye kiss but she reached over and pulled the door closed and sped away from the curb, never looking back, furious that he was so damned stubborn.

His presentation went superbly. The Q&A session had been grueling and he was tired but immensely pleased. Considering the comments of the committee and offers to guest-lecture at several European universities, he cut short his attendance and hurried back to his hotel room to call Penny.

His calls went directly to voice mail and after the fourth call, he quit trying to reach her.

* * *

><p>Penny was sitting for her Physics 101 test. It wasn't difficult and she was through with it in less than half the time allowed and was slowly checking over her work just as Sheldon had taught her to do. She smugly turned the worksheets into the exam proctor and started to leave when Dr. Gabelhauser came to the door.<p>

"Miss Drummond…Penny…please come with me. I need to speak with you." He looked ashen and her stomach clenched and she felt faint for a moment. Howard and Raj were standing behind him looking close to tears. Howard blurted out "Sheldon's plane broke up in a storm over the Atlantic. They are searching for survivors but…"

Penny didn't hear anything else he said. She walked away and then sat down, suddenly boneless, on the floor of the corridor and started to cry.

* * *

><p>The world descended on apartment 4B, or so it seemed. Friends from the Cheesecake Factory, Sheldon's friends and colleagues and people she didn't even know came by to offer their condolences, bring food, and talk quietly about Sheldon.<p>

She sat on the couch, greeting people she wouldn't remember because all she could think about was how distant and cold she'd been to him.

Raj noticed that the message light was flashing on their home answering machine and he pressed play and then started to laugh. He yelled at everyone to 'be quieting yourselves now and _listen_!

"_Penny, this is Sheldon Lee Cooper…I…I missed my plane, Penny…Penny, please pick up…Penny?'_


	26. Chapter 26

When I'm in a raunchy mood I write raunchy stuff occasionally. This is one such occasion. Nothing here is important to the overall story line so kiddies, hit the back button and read something else. This is definitely 'M' for Mature and raunchy and totally inappropriate but then I'm in a mood.

Reparata

* * *

><p>Chapter 26<p>

The only flight he could get from London to D.C. had only one available seat – in coach. He tried to upgrade to First Class but was told there were no seats available. Grumbling, he tried to book another flight but it was full. Apparently there was a dying need amongst the English to visit Washington, D.C., named after one of the few generals to ever best the British Army in the field.

Consulting his memory, he figured that Boston was as good a destination as D.C. and secured a First Class seat on the next plane leaving Heathrow. He spent the night in a quaint little boarding house near the airport and had dinner alone but was soon joined by a young woman who was on her way to Boston to visit family. She'd spent the last 2 years in Ireland. Her name was Jean Marie.

Logan Int'l  
>Boston, MA<p>

"Well, Sheldon, it's been real. Now, you remember what we talked about and I really think you need to consider one of those 'marriage encounters'. They have them for engaged people also. Anyhoooooo, I see my sister so I'll be running along. Bless you, Sheldon."

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek and then skipped down the concourse, her habit sailing around her and her mantissa threatening to render her airborne. Sister Jean Marie was home at last.

Sheldon chuckled when he thought about Jean Marie…she'd only let out her great secret when the plane was hooking up to the jet way on arrival.

"Sheldon, it's been enjoyable. I don't think I've had such a non-religious good time since I was 12 or so. Now, you couldn't possibly know because the Lord chose to take your sight, but I'm a nun and you're a decidedly good looking man that I might even have considered…well, be that as it may, remember our conversations and follow your heart."

Sheldon was so shocked that he turned the wrong way and tried to walk off the plane through the pilot's cockpit – a really big no-no. "Honestly, Sheldon, for a future Nobel Laureate ye can't find yer arse with both hands." Her Boston accent was colored after the time she spent in Ireland. "Now, put yer hand on my shoulder and I'll deliver ye from the evils of the Customs Service and get ye to yer next flight."

"Sheldon, do you know what the Bishop told the priest when he asked if he could date a nun?"

"No. I didn't think priests and nuns…"

"The Bishop answered, 'Surely, my son, so long as ye don't get into the habit!'" Sheldon wasn't sure if he should laugh but her laughter was so infectious that he couldn't stop it.

Sheldon forgot his nervousness and followed the small woman through the airport. He had rarely enjoyed a discussion about philosophy and the debate that followed as much as he had with this…nun? He couldn't wait to tell Penny…if she was still around.

He slept most of the flight from Logan to LAX. The time difference had caught up to him with a vengeance.

Since his flight arrived early in the morning West Coast time, he decided to simply take a cab back to his apartment. He didn't want to piss her off even more. The Irish Linen shawl and the hand-tooled Moroccan Leather purse he bought for her in duty-free were poor substitutes for a trip to London but her exams were more important, at least in his opinion.

His damned cell phone was either on the fritz or out of juice. He hadn't been able to charge it since leaving the U.S. He'd forgotten to pack his charger. Was it a subconscious desire to avoid speaking with Penny? Or was it more deep-seated than that? He would think about it 'in background' but for now, he needed a shower and a change of clothes and about four hours of uninterrupted REM cycles.

He trudged up the stairway to his apartment and fumbled for his keys. He had just managed to get the key in the lock when it was torn for his grasp by the door being flung open. He was shocked for an instant but then he was enveloped in vanilla-scented Penny.

"Don't say a word, baby, not one word. I need to talk and you need to listen." She had him in a death grip, her arms around his neck and her face buried in his neck. She awkwardly drew him into the apartment and then maneuvered him to their couch, all without removing herself from him.

"I was so hateful to you and I was childish and thoughtless and immature and I don't blame you for not taking my calls and I'm so damned sorry I acted like a bitch, Sheldon, but I didn't want you going alone and I was so damned mad at you, me, our situation that I just…"

"Take a breath, Penny, and please, release the choke hold you have on me. I can't breathe, woman."

"And then Dr. Gabelhauser told me that you died in a plane crash and I just fell apart. Sheldon, I don't ever, ever, want you to be apart from me. No more trips without me. No more conferences that I can't attend with you because of my studies. No more! I almost died…I felt my heart beating faster and harder and I thought it was going to break…and you didn't answer your cell phone and you didn't call…"

She was crying and her nose was running and he could imagine the germ-laden mucous smeared all over his clothing. Imagine it, he could. Repulsed by it…not this time. Probably later when he thought about it but not at the moment. He was more interested in the warm bundle of vanilla-scented squirm that he was holding.

"Penelope, I would be a fool to die and leave you behind. I'm a possible, no, make that _probable_, Nobel Candidate; do you think I'd miss that? That I'd miss our nuptials, our honeymoon in Stockholm, our river cruise down the Danube?"

"Take me to bed, Sheldon. I'm so damned tired and horny and I called every airline but couldn't find your flight and then the airline called and said you never made your flight but I already knew that and…"

"Shh. I'm home, obviously, and I'm in need of a shower also. I've spent 48 hours in these clothes and I can't imagine what horrible diseases I picked up in England and on the airplane coming back– oh – I got you something…"

"Shower, Sheldon, then bed, then sleep and then I'll check out the goodies but first, please, kiss me and tell me you love me and forgive me for being such a…"

"Sheldon!" He stood up, taking her with him and walked deliberately into the bathroom. "Sheldon Lee Cooper – don't you dare!" He reached in and turned on the cold water and then the hot, barely constraining her, as he struggled to hold her and still adjust the water temperature.

"Sheldon, put me down!" Her actions belied her angry words. She had her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist with her ankles locked and her mouth nibbling at his ear and neck. He had one hand on each of her thinly-clad buttocks. She was wearing only a t-shirt and the thin cotton yoga pants she favored for sleep when on her period.

"Don't you dare…" He stifled her idle threats with his lips and he managed to get his shoes off before stepping into the tub. Her tongue was dueling with his and he fumbled with his tie but she made quick work of it, tossing it over the shower curtain onto the floor.

"Suit coat…" he mumbled into her mouth and she pulled it off him with one hand, hanging onto his neck with the other. It went sailing over the shower rod to land somewhere in the bathroom. Next went his shirt and then she pulled his belt through the loops and tossed it out of the shower. "Hang on," he whispered and let go of her ass and opened his trousers and let them pool around his ankles. His boxers were next and he pushed the soaking mass out of the way with a foot.

"Penny, I need you naked. Coitus is impossible when you're wearing sleep pants." The pedantic manner in which he stated the obvious made her giggle and she unlocked her legs from around his waist and stripped off the pants and panties that were wet from her arousal and the hot shower cascading around them.

Sheldon turned them around so that her back was against the shower wall and his reached behind her knees and brought her up against his stomach. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and her legs around his waist and he stepped away and she slid slowly down until the tip of his cock was against her lips.

"Yesss, that's what I want. I want that big cock in me and I want you to fuck me so hard for being so mean to you. I've been a bad girl, Shel, and I deserve a hard fucking."

"So be it."

He bit her, hard enough to hurt but not hard enough to break the skin and she yelped in pain and surprise but then he slipped into her and she clenched her muscles at the suddenness of his invasion but relaxed and allowed herself to slide all the way down his length until they were joined.

He began to fuck her slowly by lifting her up by her ass until just the head was engulfed in her warm wetness and then allowing gravity to reseat her tightly against him, her clit mashed against his pubic bone.

He sucked on her neck and she reveled in the pain and pleasure as he continued to plunder her.

"I'm close, Sheldon, close. Please, cum with me, baby. I'm so sorry and I want…"

"You want. You need. You gotta have. Well, maybe you won't get it this time…" He chuckled in that low demonic way that sent shivers up her spine and Raj and Howard looking for a hiding place. Evil Sheldon was out and about.

He stopped moving and she clenched her vaginal muscles around him and began to slowly move up and down using her arms and thighs. She knew what she wanted but this…this was an incredible turn-on for her. He was making her pay for her pleasure and this was a new Sheldon, one she hoped she see again.

He was close, so close and he wanted to just let go but he held on, enjoying the feeling of her milking his cock until finally she buried her face in his neck and bit down hard enough to be felt but not mark.

Sheldon pulled her up and off his cock and then let her down slowly and his climax nearly made him fall. She was getting frantic and close but she just couldn't…and then he touched her tight rosebud and pressed inward and she fell apart.

The water was turning luke warm and they just held on to each other, leaning against the shower wall, not saying anything. Sheldon's legs began to quiver with near muscle fatigue and he lowered her down onto her feet.

"Wow…just…wow. That…what you did…I never did…not until now. Shel, I'm sorry for being a jerk. I never should have just dumped you out at the airport but I wanted to go with you so bad, baby and I just got mad and I promise it'll never happen again."

* * *

><p>The clerk at the dry cleaners gave Penny a strange look when she dropped off his wet suit coat and trousers the next morning. "What? He was in England and it rains in England. A lot."<p>

Penny had spent most of the night awake and plotting. Not revenge, oh, no, never. She was rearranging activities and dates and making mental lists of things to do.

She was planning on getting married the next weekend in Las Vegas. She couldn't wait and didn't see the need. Missy and Memaw would be okay with it since her health was nearly back to pre-stroke quality and her folks always wanted to see Las Vegas. Howard and Raj regularly went to Vegas for weekends so she knew they wouldn't object.

The problem was Sheldon and his damned schedules and plans.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

"Hello, Ms. Drummond. To what do I owe the pleasure?" Alex Forrest was bored and dealing with squints all day drove her quietly crazy by the end of the cycle.

"Got plans for the weekend? Can you make it to Vegas? I'm getting married. The groom doesn't know it yet and I'm trying to get all my ducks in a row before springing it on him." She filled her in on the past few days and how she'd almost lost Sheldon.

"I'll run it by the boss. What about the reluctant Best Man?" Even with all commo monitored, she wanted confirmation.

"He told Sheldon he'd do it. I – I don't want to call him, Alex. Can you – "

"Consider it done if the boss has no objections. Now, what about the honeymoon?"

"He's a shoe-in for the Nobel Prize so we'll combine the award trip with a honeymoon. He's all set on a cruise down the Danube but I want to wait until after his surgery and recovery period so it'll be _at least_ next Xmas before we do the river cruise. I want him to be able to see what we're floating through not just have to imagine it from my crappy descriptions."

"There may be conditions, Penny. You know that the project here isn't getting off the launch pad and we may need Dr. Cooper's insights but that would be after the wedding, of course. A day or two, no more. Dr. Hofstadter is very frustrated with some aspects of the thermal control issues and our models suggest that SuperHydrazine may not be a stable propellant because of it. Think Sheldon would be okay with a little 'consulting'?"

"I think, with the proper motivation, he'll be more than willing to help out his old friend. Just make sure nothing happens to him."

They talked logistics ('What are you wearing, Penny?') and transport and lodging (We're renting a van. I'll drive. Lenny and Squigy will probably spend the drive up making out with their dates and the drive back sleeping) and then said their goodbyes.

* * *

><p>Penny checked her list and found only one item unchecked: the Groom.<p>

Sheldon had just returned from his weekly 'blind training' session and was tired and a little cranky. Even though it was just a temporary stop-gap measure, they avoided talking about it unless he brought it up. She knew her whack-a-doodle boyfriend always had a 'survival' plan and the training sessions were his way of amending his plan to include transplant failure.

"Sheldon, I've checked your executive planner and, unless you're holding out on me, we're free for the next five days, right? So, tomorrow we're going to head back East to Las Vegas…"

"Ooo…we can play blackjack if they don't crap their drawers at having someone tell me my cards. Penny, get us a small suite at the Luxor or one of the upscale hotel/casinos." Sheldon would never admit it but being left behind when his friends went to Vegas always hurt the feelings he never admitted to having. His one and only trip to Las Vegas had netted him a cool $800 profit on his initial stake of $20 and he was anxious to test his counting skills against the 5-deck shoes.

"Actually, Honey Pot, I was thinking that instead of playing blackjack we could get married."

"But Penny, our families and our friends won't be able to be with us and…" Penny smiled. He hadn't said 'no' and she felt better about sneaking around behind his back.

"Already taken care of, Shel. Your grandmother and sister will be with us as will my Mom and Dad and Raj and Aisha and Howard and Bernadette. I talked with Alexandra and she'll have Leonard and his new girlfriend in tow. Um, I hope you don't mind but I already booked us a suite at a regular hotel. We can play cards after we get married, okay? Marriage then blackjack."

"No, Penny. Wedding then a nice meal and maybe a little dancing. Then we slip away to our suite. Blackjack will be the last thing on my mind."

She got flustered and then remembered the 'conditions' regarding Leonard's appearance.

"Shel, Leonard's being sprung to be Best Man but you'll have to agree to go to the place we-never-mention-because-we-like-sunlight and help out on a problem. It'll just be for a day or two at the most. Please?"

He'd never tell her 'no' but did enjoy making her grovel and beg in her own way so he was prepared for her tongue in his ear and her breathy voice describing just how much she was looking forward to trying some 'new and innovative' things in bed. 'Innovation' and it's derivatives (another word from her vocabulary builder) had been yesterday's word.

"Penny, I must acknowledge your growing vocabulary. It's always a surprise hearing you use new words. However, I don't think 'felate' is a 'derivative' of fellatio."

Penny grinned and smacked him lightly on the shoulder. She also made a mental note to check her on-line dictionary for the proper term and its spelling.

"So, will you marry me, Moon Pie, in Las Vegas, on Saturday?"

"Any time, any place, Penny, but don't call me Moon Pie!"

* * *

><p>AN: Short but I have to find a new home for my stuff so bear with me. I'll post my new 'literary home' for my stuff if I still can access my account. Thanks for reading.

Reparata Briggendiola  
>614/2012


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